Would soliloquoys work in real life?

veryangryman

Wouldnt it be cool in a parallel universe, if people just walk off from the crowd a bit, and start completely trying to define existance like some Shakesperian character.

Really a great way to let off some steam i would imagine. Humanity generally uses the pub/brothel for same at present.

Id love to see Brian Cowen do this sometime when he gets sick to the teeth of Enda's Mayo Accent, or Adam Clayton when Bono gives one too many bible bashings.

galwayrush

Ferking hell, can i have some of what you're on..............:)

Millicent

I really hope so OP. That would be awesome!

*to self* Would it be awesome? Can one ever know? Why are we even here? I'd really like a bag of crisps right now...


Yup, that could work.

stovelid

I actually talk to myself a lot. It just weird people out but what would they know?

Fizman

I'm with Humanity on this one. Brothel's are the way to go.

Pacing Mule

So there I was browsing After Hours and I saw this thread that was all wrong. Soliloquoys he said - I said Solilioquies he means.

I'm finished talking to myself - on with the show ....

Teddy Chips

Shakespeare was a noted stoner.

Diabhal Beag

And to thee I say I would fap off to thou'st enormous tities

ejmaztec

An "aside" would be a lot more entertaining, and would often lead to extreme violence.

veryangryman

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=relVNf8ZGHM

epgc3fyqirnbsx

It sounds f*cking fantastic, I can just imagine walking through town checking out all the people staring into the middle distance arguing aloud with the deepest depths of their mind!

I'll tell ya what, it would make a great movie!

Mars Bar

Haha! Just the title of the thread gave me a good laugh!

Reminds of this game on Whose Line Is It Anyway:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B9f-DWuoPTA

Kasabian

Some of the best arguments I have had were with myself , I lost them all.

ejmaztec

A lot of homeless people have turned talking sh1te to themselves into an art-form. If we did it, the feckers would bottle us for taking the piss.

bazza1

I think you would be locked up quickly
and left to sleep...perchance to dream

AnonoBoy

Here I am, alone again, a pile of empty beer bottles beside me. My jeans opened, one window on boards.ie, one on hunksofthedail.net, trying to jack off and focus on the screen through the tears of loneliness, despair and desperation. It's been 67 weeks since she left me. 67 weeks, 15 hours and 43 minutes. Her facebook has been on private for 66 weeks, 2 hours and 14 minutes. I still haven't worked out her password. The heating is gone again so my erection keeps shrivelling in the bitter cold. Bitter. That's the word alright. Bitter for the wasted years and the money wasted trying to buy her love. Eventually the mediocre climax leaves me reaching for tissues and trying to clean the stains off the threadbare couch. My sweaty buttocks have stuck to the cheap faux leather. I wince as I peel myself off and waddle, jeans around my ankles, to the direction of the fridge. Another beer. A party size pack of cheap Centra crisps. More sobbing.














Nah. I don't think I'd like that.

Corkfeen

I regularly do this but I may be considered mentally disturbed for doing so.

*Alack, what doth society know of the workings of my mind.. Plebians all of ye. If they were to know what I am saying , one doth not know what they wouldst do.Hope that I do not get banned for semi shakespearean speech *

The Mad Hatter

Whyever do I stroll through After Hours
Wond'ring if entertainment's to be had
When deep within my beating heart I know
That somewhere I've got other work to do.
But here again I find myself, alas
To browse? Oh no, but to soliloquise,
And soon enough I know I'll realise
That I've stayed rather longer than I should.

johnnyskeleton

Those people with the hands free mobile phones are scary enough, soliloquies would be insane.

What happens if you're in the toilets taking a slash and someone beside you says "What is the meaning of life? If I am just a speck of dust floating through space, can there ever be meaning?" what do you do? Do you answer them? Do you let them keep floating through space?

And what about when you go to order a coffee and the attendant has to come to a Cartesian understanding of himself before he can give you your coffee? Forget about asking for a cappuccino.

It is sometimes good to have a forum to express your wildest thoughts without scaring your neighbours and colleagues (it is to be assumed that a girlfriend who is not tolerant of your philosophising will not stick around for long). That, I guess, is what the internet is for, particularly boards.ie.

In fact, there are two fora for soliloquies - Ranting and raving for the angry ones, and Sunshine and Lollipops for the slightly less angry ones.

Bolag_the_2nd

i live alone, so this is normal for me, i argue with the telly and so forth out loud all the time, the only thing is, when my girls come home or my boyfriend is here, i still do it, i was also cought swaying from side to side whilst i was watching the skying in the winter olympics, ooohhhh the embarrasment

fizzynicenice

I'd like to reveal my plans for world domination to a secret agent, while I slowly and painstakingly lower him into a pit of poisonous frogs.

RachPie

It would be hilarious. I think I'm going to try that tomorrow in the middle of the library to see if people get freaked. Or narrate your own life.. that would be epic.. family guy ftw

johnnyskeleton

fizzynicenice wrote: »

I'd like to reveal my plans for world domination to a secret agent, while I slowly and painstakingly lower him into a pit of poisonous frogs.

While Karate chopping him?

eZe^

Montages would be WAYYYYYYY better than a soliloquy. Imagine having a stack of unread college notes on one side of you in the library, bing bang montage shots, queue the final picture being the notes at the otherside of you and all the information being in your brain. Oh the amount of times I fantasize about how to avoid doing actual work.....

kryogen

i have actually managed to work 4 or 5 soliloqouys into my everyday life

they are full of win tbh

Millicent

eZe^ wrote: »

Montages would be WAYYYYYYY better than a soliloquy. Imagine having a stack of unread college notes on one side of you in the library, bing bang montage shots, queue the final picture being the notes at the otherside of you and all the information being in your brain. Oh the amount of times I fantasize about how to avoid doing actual work.....

You're a freaking genius! *There's gonna be a montage, MONTAGE!*

kryogen

Millicent wrote: »

You're a freaking genius! *There's gonna be a montage, MONTAGE!*

"even Rocky had a montage, MONTAGE!"

Thomas828

I can't imagine it would work in real life. Supposing you're on a crowded bus and half the people are talking out loud to themselves? You'd want to get off quick rather than stay among those freaks!

Pittens

Supposing you're on a crowded bus and half the people are talking out loud to themselves?

Well we've gotten used to it with mobiles. Particularly the hidden ones.

i was walking up a hilly street yesterday ( the hill is background; it plays no further part in this story, feel free to banish it from your mind) and some chap who was sweeping the street was shouting about his work. Something like:

"The fcukers! Why am I doing This! Why.The c*nts. Why me. You know yourself. You know it!!They have in it for the likes of me, of us!"

I didnt think he was mad at all. I thought he had a bluetooth earpiece. Bitching to a work colleague. So I didnt find the need to cross the road.

Turns out he was mad. No earpiece. No phone.

I could have been clobbered with a shovel.

AnonoBoy

Pittens wrote: »

Turns out he was mad.

When he was young his mother told him he could go anywhere and do anything. He dreamed of being an airline pilot - flying across the atlantic in a sharp uniform and having sexy trysts with hostesses in Manhattan hotel suites, getting the respect of his peers, having young boys look up to him in awe.

Now he's sweeping up sh*t on a hilly street where people avoid him lest he clobber them with his shovel.

I'd wouldn't say he's mad, he's probably flippin' furious!

TobyZiegler

OR how about having Morgan Freeman narrating your life? That would be cool . (Stolen from a Facebook group but thought it was a cool idea!)

RobbieTheRobber

I wouldn'y like soliloquies or morgan freeman narrating my life, but I would be happy to have my own theme tune for when i enter rooms or even when Im walking down a street.

sexdwarf

Pageant Messiah wrote: »

So there I was browsing After Hours and I saw this thread that was all wrong. Soliloquoys he said - I said Solilioquies he means.

I'm finished talking to myself - on with the show ....

Soliloquies even!

pickarooney

I think it'd be cool if every time I walked away from my car it would blow up, throwing me to the ground.

AnonoBoy

AnonoBoy wrote: »

It's been 67 weeks since she left me. 67 weeks, 15 hours and 43 minutes. Her facebook has been on private for 66 weeks, 2 hours and 14 minutes. I still haven't worked out her password.

Classic. :pac:

AnonoBoy

pickarooney wrote: »

I think it'd be cool if every time I walked away from my car it would blow up, throwing me to the ground.

That would be awesome except if you worked as a valet.

I think I'd rather a parallel universe where there was a soundtrack to my life..

Twist and Shout, Careless Whisper and The Final Countdown getting played the most.

sbsquarepants

There is a section of society who use solilioquies regularly, they're called psychiatric patients, generally doesn't work out well for them though.

What would be really helpfull would be a soundtrack, i'd like something old school cool, like in a tarrantino movie.

****, should have read last post! plus it was half an hour previous, note to self....stop skipping things!