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"The One" is a Friend

  • 01-03-2010 8:40pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I wish my life could be more straightforward but I am head over heels infatuated with a friend of mine. I/m 29, she's 28.

    We worked together, she moved on, we stayed in contact. We are good friends. Meet up say once a month and talk on the phone once a week. We know each about 5 years.

    She is just out of a relationship. I thought my chance had gone but now I want to see if I have a chance.

    The questions I have (given my lack of luck in the relationship stakes):

    1. What are the tell tale signs that a girl would give off if she would prefer to be more than friends? What are the signs that you are in the zone.

    2. What is the best way to speak to her. I know it may ruin a friendship but I would not like to make her feel uncomfortable.

    Right now my head is in a mess and she is on my mind many times a day.


Comments

  • #2
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Just go for it man!! Ask her out! Life is too short for ifs and buts.


  • #3
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    whereingalway wrote: »
    I wish my life could be more straightforward but I am head over heels infatuated with a friend of mine. I/m 29, she's 28.

    We worked together, she moved on, we stayed in contact. We are good friends. Meet up say once a month and talk on the phone once a week. We know each about 5 years.

    She is just out of a relationship. I thought my chance had gone but now I want to see if I have a chance.
    How recently? she might need some time to get her head together. You don't want to get involved unless she has complete focus on you tbh.
    The questions I have (given my lack of luck in the relationship stakes):

    1. What are the tell tale signs that a girl would give off if she would prefer to be more than friends? What are the signs that you are in the zone.
    She may or may not pick up your signals depending on how recently this relationship ended. Wanting to see you more is a good indicator tbh.
    2. What is the best way to speak to her. I know it may ruin a friendship but I would not like to make her feel uncomfortable.
    See her more often for a start. If you do she'll naturally get the impression that you might like her imo. Once a month isn't very often tbh.
    Right now my head is in a mess and she is on my mind many times a day.
    Only one way to sort that out (:

    Give her a chance to see that you want to be more than friends.


  • #4
    Miller Boy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 47 ✭Miller Boy


    OP, I agree with usernamemr. This may be your only chance. I wouldn't hang about, looking for signs or signals. Try not to be too blunt though. Ask her out for a drink, maybe, and take it from there. And if you get an opening to say something, take it. And good luck! :)


  • #5
    kjl
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,127 ✭✭✭kjl


    Knock yourself out and asker her out if you want, but be warned, judging from you post she is almost certainly not going to say yes.

    You have been friends for 5 years and i guarantee that's how she sees you.

    ask her out if you wan, but be prepared to lose the friendship


  • #6
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    I half agree with you.
    kjl wrote: »
    Knock yourself out and asker her out if you want, but be warned, judging from you post she is almost certainly not going to say yes.
    She might not see it yet.
    You have been friends for 5 years and i guarantee that's how she sees you.
    That can be a big barrier to cross.
    ask her out if you wan, but be prepared to lose the friendship

    Likely. Soon as the can of worms is open, its make or break.


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