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do we have a future?

  • 19-02-2010 12:55pm
    #1
    oldwan
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 37 ✭


    bit long this, need outside opinion!!! too close 4 me 2 be objective. i met a guy 2 yrs ago, we hit it off straight away, as friends, we were great mates, saw a lot of each other and talked all the time, about everything. we were both out of long term relationships and neither of us were looking for another one, any way bout a year ago, we got together, scary at first cos we didnt want hassle of relationship stuff again. however, i love him now very very much, i feel deep down he is the right one for me, he told me before xmas that he loved me. since then though things have changed, he has backed off, i am now getting scared that he is going to run away and break my heart. i tried to explain to him, he knows he does this a bit but says its cos he is scared of being in a relationship, of getting hurt again. i understand but surely he knows me well enough at this stage? i told him i cant see him cos it feels like he doesnt want 2 see me as much as he once did. he said thats in my head, of course he still likes me but he is weird cos of his hang ups about relationships. i just dont know wot to do, im i making it worse by being paranoid? he isnt very good at talking about this and tends to get annoyed when i say anything like this. he says he doesnt want to hurt me, but should i wait? should i be patient and understanding? im scared of being rejected too, and i dont want to appear like a sad pathetic loser?
    please give me advice!! i love him and i do think that he loves me, im just losing faith now.


Comments

  • #2
    Beruthiel
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 42,362 Mod ✭✭✭✭Beruthiel


    First, can I ask that you use more paragraphs?
    That was very difficult to read.

    Secondly, you call yourself auldwan, what age are ye?

    What is it you want from this relationship?

    Are you looking to have children?

    He may fear relationships as such, but he has been with you for one year. Does that not say something?
    Is it not possible to just relax and enjoy what ye have?

    Would I be right in saying that you over think everything instead of just going with the flow?


  • #3
    oldwan
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 37 ✭oldwan


    sorry, not used 2 this at all!!
    im 33, not really old i know but old enough 2 have sense!

    yeah, i know wot ur saying i do tend to overthink, but if i got a bit of encouragement occasionally i would be fine!!
    its just lately this happened, since he backed off.

    never thought bout kids etc, but in a perfect world, then yes i guess i would like all that stuff, not holding my breath tho!
    thks 4 ans me :)


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