Minor issue which is bothering me

LegacyUser

OK, so I started dating this guy about 3 weeks ago. He's a dote and I really like him. He seems to really like me too. He texts/calls every day, he says lovely things and we meet up every second or third day.

We would usually go out for a couple of drinks or out for dinner. He always pays, and collects me and drops me home. But there is one thing that is bothering me and it's probably down to my own insecurities. He is 4 years younger than me (I'm 28).
When we are alone, in my house, he is affectionate and lovely. He holds my hand, we lie on the couch watching tv, he gives me foot rubs etc.

But when we are out he isn't very affectionate. Like last night we went to a cafe for a bite to eat and I finished my coffee and he said "are you right" and I said yes, turned to get my bag and coat and by the time I turned back he was on his way out the door.

When we sit in the pub he doesn't hold my hand.

I'm not the most secure person and I am worried that he doesn't like being seen in public with me. In private he seems to be mad about me, he tells me he really likes me and I make him happy but in public its a different story.

I want to introduce him to my friends etc but I'm a bit put off as they might think he's rude or not interested in me.

Should I just accept this is the way he is?
Any tips as to how to get him to be a bit more "with me" in public.
Or is he just embarrassed by me?

Barracudaincork

I doubt very much he is embarrassed by you, id say he just doesnt do public displays of affection of maybe he thinks you dont.

What happens when you go to hold his hand in the pub or you kiss him in public or give him a hug? Does he drop the hand straight away, does he turn his head away etc?

Or do you not go to hold his hand, kiss him etc? If you dont, you cant really expect him to either, esp after 3 weeks, you are both learning about each others bounderies and if he cares about you as much as you discribe then he wont want to do anything to pi$$ you off, like holding your hand in public etc

LegacyUser

OP again.
No, I don't try to hold his hand or kiss him in public. I didn't want to push it.

I'd be afraid I'd embarrass him if he's not into PDAs.

Barracudaincork

And maybe he feels the same!

I can so see why you dont want to "push it" and he might not be into PDA's but he also might be. If you want to know for sure you can either be brave and take his hand or kiss him or you could just ask him how he feels about it. Dont be embarrassed about doing so, you could even start off telling him about a train station in europe somewhere (cant remember, think its France) who have banned PDA's on the platform as they were delaying the trains, laugh over this and then casually ask him what does he think of PDA or mention that you are all for PDA's but not to that extreme and laugh at the same time.

LegacyUser

I think thats a good idea, to bring it up and see his reaction.

I really hope he is ok with PDAs. Not wearing the face off each other in front of people, but I do like an arm around me or my hand held.