More friend zone foolishness

LegacyUser

Help, over the past few weeks I realised that I had started to fancy a girl who's been a very close friend for almosy a year. We hang out quite a bit. For years I've been going through the same cycle of having a crush on a friend, doing nothing about it, eventually letting the crush go away and usually remain friends. It can be horrible though and I wasted months last year because if it.

This year I decided no more, I would ask someone out if I fancied them. That was I couldn't fall ito the friendzone anymore because I'd ask them out before we became friends. Of course the typical thing is around the time I made up this rule I go and begin to realise I like my friend. Usually I fancy a girl, do nothing to let them know and then I'm in the friendzone. This is one of the few times where I've started liking someone who I'd only ever been friends with before.

I was drunk during the week and even though I knew she had a date with some new guy who she said she wasn't sure if she liked. I sent her a text relling her to not be wasting her time and go on a date with me instead. Her replies did not completely knock me back but she wasn't exactly jumping for joy either. She asked was I joking and said she wasn't wasting her time just giving a guy a chance. Then said we should go on a lunch date or something. I replied that I wasn't joking, I just said what I had wanted to. She said that's good, lets meet up so.

Now the terrible thing is I know I wouldn't have done it without the drink and I'm pretty sure I shouldn't have. When I logically think about it I sent that text more for me than for her. I wanted it out just cause I didn't want to agonize over her for months but the one thing I didn't think of before I asked was whether she'd given me and indication that she liked me, she hadn't.

I'm meeting her in the next few days and I'm not sure what to do. I'd rather she nearly forget about what I said. I know that our friendship is more important to me than a crush that just appeared out of nowhere. It would be better for me to go for knew girls who are not friends and go for them before we become friends. Any idea of how I should get through this 'date' or whatever it is. I'm pretty sure it is not a date. I don't want things to be awkward between us because we are very good friends. I know I can get rid of the crush, in fact it's nearly went away as soon as I asked her out. Should I meet her and hope she doesn't bring it up and we just stay the way we always are? Should I say 'look I've liked you for a few weeks and I was just wanted you t know because I don't want any regrets anymore but I've realised that our friendship means too much to me to jeopardise'?

I know it might sound like I'm pre-empting the just friends talk there but I'm not. Our friendship does mean a lot, I'm almost positive she's not interested and here's the real kicker, most of the crush went away as soon as I asked her out.

Angus Og

So what are you going to do, let the vicious cycle continue? There's nothing wrong with speaking your mind. Your problem is that you can't do it without alcohol.

If she said it was good for the two of you to have a lunch date, then I don't think you have much to worry about. If she's your friend, she won't drag you out for lunch just so she can humiliate you. She would have said no.

Just be honest with her. Lots of serious relationships start out between friends, and what's wrong with that?