being naive? or living in the real world?

LegacyUser

I am going unreg for this one. I read the relationship issues alot and sometimes post.
I'd like to talk about a serious topic if thats ok with the moderators and members.

The question I am bringing up is well, doing the right thing? or realising people can be just out for themselves? ... how to live our lives in dating/relationships in this world.
Personally, i've always tried to do the right thing in relationships. To be respectful and understanding of others. To believe them. But what about realising that the world is not really a nice place sometimes. That people can be the same.
I guess what I am saying is how to handle yourself in a relationship in this world? ... lets take certain threads on here for example. Generally if its a detailed one you will have members on either side of the coin. Showing multiple views on a situation. Some say to be understanding to the other half while others have realistic world views (to not get used or fooled)

if we want to talk about examples i've read:
Say a boyfriend is flirting with another girl ... some people say its only harmless flirting and dont worry. others say he isn't that much into his gf.
or if a couple breaks up and a few days later one of them sleeps with another person and doesnt see an issue. some say "well they were single!" - others say "well, thats bad, they obviously didnt care much. good riddence."

i dont know if i've made my self clear on this one. i'm speaking from the heart. about people. about relationships. From people giving advice, but more so being in them.

How do you live your life in this world of dating? be respectful and believe blindly in someone? or have the real world attitude that you match what they say to their actions?
Pausing and taking time to write this thread I guess its about being trusting, naive or being realistic. But also what is trust? Is it best to only trust someone as much as they've earned? Not to be "untrusting" - but realistic.

Thoughts please.

Silverfish

Hi OP

This forum is for people seeking advice on their relationships, not so much for general discussion.

Perhaps the Humanities forum might be more suitable.