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Should we break up

  • 30-01-2010 9:47pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    I'm in my early twenties and in a relationship for about a year with a girl who is around 2 and a half years younger I was mad about her from the first moment I saw her and at the beginning we got on great. However for the past six months we have been constantly fighting and giving out about each other. She says she does'nt get my personality and she annoys me in so many ways. Both sets of mutual friends are against the relationship and dislike the respective other half. We don't really socialize with each other at all. She has also given me a blow by blow account of everyone she was ever with and was in a serious negative relationship around a year before meeting me. She is also a serious flirt and although i don t think she has cheated on me, she is constantly texting other lads from her past and who she meets around. I for my part am not a brilliant boyfriend, I can be selfish, self centred and I sometimes put my friends and my social life before the relaionship. At times also i'm not that reliable and do not keep promises. We've broken up a few times but always get back together.

    You may ask what we're doing together? Well the thing is we both really love each other a lot. At times the relationship can be really good, with an intense almost magnetic love between the two of us. When I'm with her we rarely fight its usually when we're apart and texting each other or when one of us is leaving. We always fall asleep in each others arms and i get a weird energy off her that always relaxes me. I think she is beautiful and the sex is absolutely amazing. I know she loves me too but its so annoying the way we always clash. I've been with plenty of girls before but never felt anything like this, but the fighting, stress, and worry is killing me!!! Should we break up for good???The last time we got back together she promised she would change.


Comments

  • #2
    Contessa Raven
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 642 ✭✭✭Contessa Raven


    Hi OP.

    It sounds to me like you both need to sit down and talk about what you are both getting out of your relationship.

    I think it's not just her that has to change, I think you both need to change. What are you rowing about? You breaking your promises? Her flirting with other guys?

    You need to learn to appreciate your relationship and make a bigger effort to keep your promises. I know that if my OH promised to do something for me or promised to meet me somewhere and then didn't, I'd be highly pissed off and if he kept doing it he would find himself alone.
    Unless she is asking the impossible, it's laziness.

    You need to explain to her that her texting and flirting with these guys hurts you and that she is damaging your relationship by continuing.

    If she doesn't "get" you why is she with you? I couldn't be with someone who didn't understand me and how I work. It'd be pointless.

    I think you guys need to have a very serious and long talk about what you're both doing to the relationship and if you can't reach an agreement that you are both happy with, I would suggest maybe breaking up.

    Best of luck OP.

    CR


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