Mad about best friend

LegacyUser

First time thread maker here.

The basic story is that Ive been friends with this girl since pretty much the start of college, we both moved from other places to where we are now. She still has a boyfriend at home who ive met and got along really well with :rolleyes: and who she is mad about as far as I can see.

Slowly got better and better friends over time and now we see eachother pretty much every day and get on much better with eachother than anyone else out of our group. I was thinking a while ago that the friendship is probably the healthiest one ive ever had with a girl. Ive had a couple of girlfriends but never anything serious and I find it really hard to open up to people, but not with her for some reason.

Things just suddenly changed for some reason about a week ago, ended up chatting together for a few hours about stuff, which isnt that unusual, then woke up the next day and couldnt get her out of my mind. Its been that way since then, going to sleep at night/waking up in the morning cant think of anything else. Never felt that way about any other girl in my life before and I dont really know what I should do about it.

Persuing it isnt an option while shes with her boyfriend. Im expecting people to advise me by saying I should stop hanging around with her or something which would be pretty hard seeing as we live near eachother and see eachother pretty much everyday as it is, but also I feel like its completely my problem, she didnt lead me on in any way or anything, so I should just be the one to get over it.

Any help is appreciated

Miller Boy

Interesting situation to be in. I was in a similar situation many, many years ago. We were both mad about each other but I just didn't have the confidence to say anything to her. And I was a little afraid of what her then boyfriend might do to me! :eek: You might have that reservation too.

You have to do something. Otherwise, it'll eat you up. Why not say something to her like, that if she wasn't going out with her boyfriend, that you'd love to go out with her, etc. She might be feeling the same, deep down, and might be delighted if you made the first move. A comment like that certainly wouldn't ruin your friendship or anything. Good luck.

LegacyUser

Miller Boy wrote: »

Interesting situation to be in. I was in a similar situation many, many years ago. We were both mad about each other but I just didn't have the confidence to say anything to her. And I was a little afraid of what her then boyfriend might do to me! :eek: You might have that reservation too.

You have to do something. Otherwise, it'll eat you up. Why not say something to her like, that if she wasn't going out with her boyfriend, that you'd love to go out with her, etc. She might be feeling the same, deep down, and might be delighted if you made the first move. A comment like that certainly wouldn't ruin your friendship or anything. Good luck.

Thanks for the reply.

That would probably be the best thing to do if I could find a way to get it across without messing up the friendship. I cant really imagine it not changing things though, nor can I imagine those words coming out of my mouth, as I said I would find that pretty hard to say in the first place and especially in such a way that I could casually dismiss it if she just ignores it or whatever. Also, Im not exactly the predatory male guy at all, Im not in the least afraid of what her boyfriend would do to me, more that since I like him I dont want to f*ck him over, hes told me how crazy he is about her so I really wouldnt feel right about it. Would like to hear what people think about that whole aspect of the thing...

Hopefully either I get my chance at some point if they break up or else I can just get over it and keep being close friends without it eating me up as you say. On the other hand I may just say something stupid when im drunk at some point and ruin the friendship . Hopefully not

LegacyUser

just like me dude, this girl i love so much, i just think she is awesome and so cool and i want to be with her, i found out she likes me but yeah i dont know what to do