Good/bad reasons for wanting to have children

PhysiologyRocks

I'm not wondering about people's personal reasons for having or not having kids and not looking for pros and cons, but what people consider to be good/bad reasons for wanting top reproduce.

I'm genuinely not sure what the good/bad reasons are, hence my asking. I suppose bad reasons to want to reproduce would include being lonely/thinking babies are cute.

Good reasons could include thinking the world is great and wanting to introduce a child to it.

Discuss.:)

jumpguy

I'm abit young, but I've thought about it abit, I would like to have kids at some point, but probs not until late 20's at the earliest!

Good things:
Would like to give my try at raising a child, take all the lessons I've learned growing up, and do my best to apply them.

Would be nice to have a happy family, that could meet at Christmas time.

Nice to have somebody to unite yourself and the partnet to take care of.

Nice to pass on hopefully some of myself onto the next generation.

Bad things:
Costly business.

Babies are a full-time job, young children aren't much better.

I've seen what some teenagers can turn out to be, and tbh I'd be terrified of my child becoming like that.

Would be worried could I give a child all the skills and support, and integrity he/she needs to grow up in this harsher world.

m5ex9oqjawdg2i

Remember that car, holiday, boat you dreamt of when you were single and childless? Well you can forget about it

Reasons for not having kids:

Keeping the world population down.
Enjoying your life to the fullest.
Less to worry about.

Reasons to have kids:

From the ages of 3 months - 18 months... That's about it... :P

cloneslad

I want kids, just not for about 8 or 9 years.... i want a family to be with and to produce and educate a little baby with my g.f or wife as i hope she becomes someday.
they are also handy to have if you need someone to go to the shop or to blame for something you broke

Hazys

Good Reason: Possible organ donors for you







Bad Reason: You're a possible organ donor for them

IM0

simple as that really.

cleremy jarkson

Bad reason: You create a future unmarked grave in ww3.

dylano_k

Good Reason: Carry on this legacy of mine

Bad Reason: I wouldn't be able to afford one in this big bad world:(

Irish_polizei

Good reason : You can take them to parent toddler groups and get to lurch at all the weemin.

Bad Reasons : As your kid grows up, it will attract other irritating little children who like "paint the walls in vomit". Also the baby will be a strain on your finances if things are tight for you, im referring to cash that is.

m@cc@

Pregnancy is the worst reason to have a kid.

Bandiman

You can pretty much sell the unfortunate woman who has to push the little fecker's head out through her squish mitten for spare parts on eBay(tm)

these women who have kids and are all smiling during the pregnancy and after they experienced the worst pain they ever likely will can't be right in the head.

same with the fathers, most would rather throw themselves off the cliffs of Moher than watch their own baby lose a fingernail.

it is extremely hard to not live the boring family life in a reasonable sized house with a boring car that doesn't go very fast and not be very adventurous or outgoing when you have kids. hats off to the few who manage to live an interesting life while looking after kids, definitely not easy. most tend to become a sort of empty husk of the person they used to be and sort of 'live for the kids'

Bandiman

jumpguy wrote: »

Nice to pass on hopefully some of myself onto the next generation.

Bad things:
Costly business.

I've seen what some teenagers can turn out to be, and tbh I'd be terrified of my child becoming like that.

I hear there's a few Women's Clinics where they pay you to pass some of yourself on to the next generation. sounds like a great deal since it costs over 100,000 GBP (pre-recesh) to raise a child from scratch.

yeah thats a real worry, when they get to 13-15 they can easily turn into a complete ****-up. only way to really avoid it is move to a remote island when they are 12

cloneslad wrote: »

I want kids, just not for about 8 or 9 years.... i want a family to be with and to produce and educate a little baby with my g.f or wife as i hope she becomes someday.
they are also handy to have if you need someone to go to the shop or to blame for something you broke

yeah but you also get blamed for all the stuff the child breaks

Karl Hungus

Cheap alternative to Turkey at Christmas.

me-skywalker

You can whip them into being an international sports star from the age of 2 to pay for all your drugs and high style livign in vegas and monte carlo.

bonerm

Ya got me! I can't think of a good reason.

Perhaps just to hang onto the missus and keep her happy. Perhaps or to maintain my "legacy" (whatever the fúck that means?) or perhaps just to demostrate to my colleagues that my balls work and to trick them into thinking I'm a 'normal' well-adjusted member of society who has the same values as them wants to follow the routine path just like everyone else?

M5

cloneslad wrote: »

I want kids, just not for about 8 or 9 years.... i want a family to be with and to produce and educate a little baby with my g.f or wife as i hope she becomes someday.
they are also handy to have if you need someone to go to the shop or to blame for something you broke

:eek:

PhysiologyRocks

Why is everyone giving me the pros and cons of having kids?

I was wondering what the wrong reasons for wanting kids are, not bad things and good things about having them.

e.g. Liking babies is probably not a great reason to take the plunge, because they won't be little forever.

syklops

Good reason: Cheap alternative to turkey at christmas.
Bad reason: Social services could take your christmas dinner away from you! :eek:

Karl Hungus

syklops wrote: »

Good reason: Cheap alternative to turkey at christmas.
Bad reason: Social services could take your christmas dinner away from you! :eek:

*Ahem*

Stop stealing the material I've stolen from Blackadder.

PhysiologyRocks

Again, why is everyone giving me the pros and cons of having kids?

I was wondering what the wrong reasons for wanting kids are, not bad things and good things about having them.

e.g. Liking babies is probably not a great reason to take the plunge, because they won't be little forever.

I genuinely am curious.

Wazdakka

Good reason: You can keep them locked in your basement for 20 years ala Joseph Fritzl

emmmm...
I mean Children are the future and all that..

peasant

right reason to have kids:
You're fully aware of all the cost, drawbacks, potential problems and the responsibility involved and you still want kids

wrong reason to have kids:
Because your mammy wants grandchildren, because it's the done thing, to get more social welfare, to save your marriage, to have an heir

MaybeLogic

PhysiologyRocks wrote: »

Again, why is everyone giving me the pros and cons of having kids?

I was wondering what the wrong reasons for wanting kids are, not bad things and good things about having them.

e.g. Liking babies is probably not a great reason to take the plunge, because they won't be little forever.

I genuinely am curious.

I assume this just applys to people who plan to have children?
We're genetically wired to have children so you can make up all the reasons you want in one part of your brain (the cortex), but it's another part of your brain at play here (the reptilian complex).
(and as long as your prepared/capable of being a loving an responsible parent,I don't see how good or bad reasons come into it.)

PhysiologyRocks

MaybeLogic wrote: »

I assume this just applys to people who plan to have children?
We're genetically wired to have children so you can make up all the reasons you want in one part of your brain (the cortex), but it's another part of your brain at play here (the reptilian complex).
(and as long as your prepared/capable of being a loving an responsible parent,I don't see how good or bad reasons come into it.)

Question applies to everyone. For example, I'd also like to see good reasons to not reproduce. Plus, the cortex can override other stuff. e.g. Even if I really wanted kids, I could decide not to have any.

I agree with the loving/responsible parent thing, but am interested in what people think. If someone said they thought liking babies was a great reason to reproduce, then I would like to hear their reasoning behind that.

MaybeLogic

PhysiologyRocks wrote: »

Question applies to everyone. Plus, the cortex can override other stuff. e.g. Even if I really wanted kids, I could decide not to have any.

I agree with the loving/responsible parent thing, but am interested in what people think. If someone said they thought liking babies was a great reason to reproduce, then I would like to hear their reasoning behind that.

I love babies. I love my nieces,I love kids in general.
And with that, I'd love to have kids of my own someday but I don't see any need or any point in rationalising it.
(not what you're asking for ,I understand)

NothingMan

So you can mould them into the perfect fighting manimal. Keep them locked in the attic and feed them buckets of fish heads and rocks so their teeth become really sharp. Bind their hands and feet so that they are more talon like. Let them only watch UFC and everybody loves Raymond so they learn to fight and are really bitter and angry, then when they're 4 send them off to junior infants and sit back and watch the slaughter.

I'll put the video on youtube in September.

weblogix01

how can you say that..its very bad

PhysiologyRocks

MaybeLogic wrote: »

I love babies. I love my nieces,I love kids in general.
And with that, I'd love to have kids of my own someday but I don't see any need or any point in rationalising it.
(not what you're asking for ,I understand)

You're absolutely right. It's needless and pointless to discuss.

I still enjoy it!

Wazdakka

You could eat one instead of a turkey at christmas,

Better get a move on girls and get up the duff, or else the baby won't be nearly big enough by christmas to feed a family of three.

Pigwidgeon

Wrong reason: To get more social welfare benefits, like children's allowance and receive council accommodation.

CathyMoran

Im petrified that i wont be a good enough parent and we have a much wanted baby on the way...the love that you feel is something else.

AckwelFoley

The desire to have children is as natural as the desire to take a sh1t.

The fact that they both come out of holes only a mere inch or so apart doesnt mean they are in any other way similar :pac:

twinytwo

-You will lose touch with your friends
-Your sex life will be over
-Children cost a fortune
-Child-rearing is endless drudgery
-Vacations will be nightmares
-You’ll lose your identity and become just “mom” or “dad”
-Your children will become mindless drones of capitalism
-The planet’s already overcrowded
-Your children will inevitably disappoint you

pickarooney

PhysiologyRocks wrote: »

Again, why is everyone giving me the pros and cons of having kids?

I was wondering what the wrong reasons for wanting kids are, not bad things and good things about having them.

e.g. Liking babies is probably not a great reason to take the plunge, because they won't be little forever.

I genuinely am curious.

You want people to both read and understand your post and then take it into account when replying? I can't see that happening here.

Good reason to have kids: to learn what it's like to truly love another human being with no strings attached.

Bad reasons to have kids: because your parents pressure you into it.
As a fashion accessory

bob the bob

I have a 9 month old boy. Never been happier. But I didn't always want kids. something in me changed when I was about 28. I wasn't scared of being old, or turning into my Dad. I had had a great time so far in life, and was ready for the next phase, ie parenting.

Good reasons:

• You love your partner and forsee a long life ahead with them. In that life, you see children
• Don't want to be in your 50s with no kids and no hope of grandkids

Bad reasons:

• Babies being used as a fashion accessory - Dress them up all cute, get loads of atention for yourself.

Maybe I'm going Off Topic here, but after 9 months with my son, this is how I feel:

You know that feeling where you buy new shoes/computer/phone/car/house/whateveryouwant??? A sort of inner happiness, a rush of endorphins??? Combine that with the pride you feel when you get your degree\get a new job\get a promotion etc etc.

I have felt those feelings every morning and night since my son was born. There is nothing like it. Pure and simple happiness, despite the sleepless nights, loss of freedom, cost, stress that it also brings.

PhysiologyRocks

CathyMoran wrote: »

Im petrified that i wont be a good enough parent and we have a much wanted baby on the way...the love that you feel is something else.

You sound like you'll be absolutely fine. You love your baby, and want to try your best. I'm not exactly an authority, but it sounds like you'll be one of the good ones!

All the best.

Mike 1972

jumpguy wrote: »

Nice to pass on hopefully some of myself onto the next generation..

Because youre so damn special it would be downright selfish of you to deprive future generations of some of yourself ?