irish girls and foreign man?

LegacyUser

So I met this girl over a dating site and we have been getting along nicely thru texts, we started with site messages and due to her not having internet at home, we've been texting each other.

We've both seen each others pictures' and we both (or at least, me) find ourselves attractive.

We've never heard each other's voice. I am not Irish, I don't think I have a bad accent, yet I am a little conscious as I don't have a pretty good command of the English language...most noticeable when speaking! To add to that, I have a bit of an 'anxiety disorder' and we have agreed I'd call her tomorrow during lunch. This is OK, but I know from past 'profiles' I've read on *this* dating site that most Irish women tend to skip foreign men. I don't want to boast, but I kind of could see her with a high interest level on me at this stage, however, I am little afraid my lack of confidence while speaking might turn her off to the point of not making it to a first date. Especially because I know that tomorrow I'll be all "huh, what should I say now". It also scares me that she might have a thick accent and I might struggle to understand her. Could someone shed some light on how important this is and whether this is a potentially big deal breaker? I know that each person thinks and reacts differently, but yesterday, I mentioned to her that I was watching the movie "La vida 'e bela" (life is beautiful) which is one of the most inspirational movies ever made, it was originally narrated in italian and then it was overdubbed in English... by italians, with their characteristic accent. This looked funny to me, but she mentioned she'd rather use subtitles. I guess I wouldn't stand the chance to be texting her on our first date during a meal, would I lol, just kidding, obviously. Any thoughts / personal experiences would be great :-)

Thanks.

Emme

the foreign wrote: »

So I met this girl over a dating site and we have been getting along nicely thru texts, we started with site messages and due to her not having internet at home, we've been texting each other.

We've both seen each others pictures' and we both (or at least, me) find ourselves attractive.

We've never heard each other's voice. I am not Irish, I don't think I have a bad accent, yet I am a little conscious as I don't have a pretty good command of the English language...most noticeable when speaking! To add to that, I have a bit of an 'anxiety disorder' and we have agreed I'd call her tomorrow during lunch. This is OK, but I know from past 'profiles' I've read on *this* dating site that most Irish women tend to skip foreign men. I don't want to boast, but I kind of could see her with a high interest level on me at this stage, however, I am little afraid my lack of confidence while speaking might turn her off to the point of not making it to a first date. Especially because I know that tomorrow I'll be all "huh, what should I say now". It also scares me that she might have a thick accent and I might struggle to understand her. Could someone shed some light on how important this is and whether this is a potentially big deal breaker? I know that each person thinks and reacts differently, but yesterday, I mentioned to her that I was watching the movie "La vida 'e bela" (life is beautiful) which is one of the most inspirational movies ever made, it was originally narrated in italian and then it was overdubbed in English... by italians, with their characteristic accent. This looked funny to me, but she mentioned she'd rather use subtitles. I guess I wouldn't stand the chance to be texting her on our first date during a meal, would I lol, just kidding, obviously. Any thoughts / personal experiences would be great :-)

Thanks.

Give it a chance. If she's not interested in you because you aren't Irish and you haven't got a bog accent or a Dub accent then that's her loss. I don't think she'd email you if she wasn't interested.

Seriously there's a good chance that she has foreign friends. From what you say I think she will give you a chance. Lots of Irish girls date foreign guys and most find it to be a very positive experience. I certainly did and ended up having long term relationships with two foreign guys.

Good luck.

Monkey61

If phone calls make you nervous I think you should just say that. I would hate the idea of calling someone who I had never met and speaking to them on the phone. I would never do that. Never never because I wouldn't be myself and I wouldn't have a clue what to say.

I presume that she knows you aren't Irish?? If so she will be expecting a strong accent surely.

Why don't you text her again, tell her that you aren't trying to mess her around but you are rubbish on the phone and would rather just meet for coffee for your first proper chat.

I'm not going to lie to you, some people would be put off by the foreignness or the problems with spoken English. I personally probably wouldn't date someone from a whole range of countries if they had a very strong accent purely because whatever way my ears and brain work together I really don't like a lot of accents and find it a major hassle trying to make my own accent understandable to someone who has trouble with English. But that is just a particular quirk of mine, the majority of people I know think that is ludicrous and have no problem with it.

For what it is worth though, your written English is really good and I would never have known that you weren't a native speaker.

Danniboo

From reading your post I wouldn't have know English wasn't your first language if you hadn't of told us. My friend is going out with a French guy for nearly a year now I think, and they're off to Australia soon. They both get on really well and have to say out of all her bfs, he's the nicest and treats her really well. I'd say go for it anyone that doesn't give you a chance because you have a different "accent", must be very shallow. Best of luck

LegacyUser

OP HERE,

Thanks for all your comments so far! It's great to have such a community to support us! I do recognize my written English is quite readable, but my problem is not really my accent per se, rather my "stop-go, stop-go", let's say I wanted to say I am a nice guy, I'd probably shove 2 long intervals into that sentence (just an example, not this one for sure) and if I start to take too long to catch up with the word(s) I want to spill next, I will then quickly jump off to say something similar-worded in an attempt to picture exactly what I am trying to say, regardless of how correct the grammar/spelling might be in the sentences. This is obviously a result of my shyness and anxiety disorder, which makes me react immediately in order to take the spotlight out of me. I am not looking for a cure or any advice on this problem, I will seek a GP for that. I was just looking for experiences and how strict are irish women are in these regards. It's good to have mixed opinions. We have been texting for a week, because I am, as I post, in my native country and will possibly be around here for the next 2-3 weeks, that's why I can't come up with an excuse to not take her call. I am trying to make myself comfortable about the idea, as I got a bit of a sense of humor, however..

Thanks!

Barracudaincork

the foreign wrote: »

but my problem is not really my accent per se, rather my "stop-go, stop-go", let's say I wanted to say I am a nice guy, I'd probably shove 2 long intervals into that sentence (just an example, not this one for sure) and if I start to take too long to catch up with the word(s) I want to spill next, I will then quickly jump off to say something similar-worded in an attempt to picture exactly what I am trying to say, regardless of how correct the grammar/spelling might be in the sentences.

OP i dont mean to be rude or belittle how you feel, but as an english speaking person i have done the exact same as you have mentioned above to a fellow english speaking person and visa versa. Basically it doesnt matter if english isnt your 1st language you can still get tongue tied. I also dont think it will make a difference to this girl, if she likes you, she will at least try and see how things go.