break up story..still love her

LegacyUser

Hi all, im a fairly regular poster on here but for the purposes of this im going to go unreg for this. I really need some sort of advice/ a telling off/ encouragement, whichever view you take i would like to hear it.

Iv posted my story up on here before, did a search there but i can’t find it. So apologies to those re-reading for the umpteenth time!

Basically, male moves into house, then female moves into house. These two hit it off really well as friends; few months pass and become really good mates. Male realises he has feelings for female, but seems as they lived together and male wasn’t sure if the feelings were mutual, male decides to try and distant himself from female. This hurts baffled female until the penny drops that i like her and she makes a move on me. A month or so later we drunkenly kiss a few times followed by pretending it never happened the next morning. This wrecks my head so i say look im moving out. This allows girl time to realise she really likes me too so we end up going out properly and continue to get really close.

A few months pass, and they were fantastic on so many levels. But alas the girl had plans to travel for a year prior to meeting me and sticks to the plans. Really difficult time, we get skype phones and ring/text/email each other at least twice a day. I travel over to meet her twice during the time she was away.(a total of 15 months) first time i travel over i hear that a guy is after her but i also hear shes telling him shes taken. I don’t confront her over what i heard as i did hear shes telling him no, and i don’t want to cause upset seem as im only there a limited period of time.

A few months nearing the end of her travel period (the 15 months) the topic of her coming home is brought up. I suggest moving in together for the summer as i will be returning to college in September, which is away from where she would be based once she does come home. She not keen on the idea of moving in together, i get the hump over this and say look iv waited 15 months, i want a bit more, a bit of progession. Shes not budging on the idea, saying shes not ready for that kind of commitment, and we end up breaking up.
A few months pass in which she comes home and keeps contacting me, wanting to meet up. Eventually i cave and i do. We talk things through and i ask her had she been with anyone while in travelling, she says no. I tell her iv been faithful but i did get with someone while we were broken up. We get back together.

Alls going great until one night i stay over at hers and the next morning she goes off to work. I go on her computer and her gmail inbox page is open. (swear i didn’t go rooting, it was open, she mustn’t have logged it off or something) one of the senders is the name of the guy i had heard that was after her. So curiosity got the better of me and sure enough its a gmail instant message conversation between the two roughly the time we broke up. Its incredibly dirty stuff from him (im talking things he would like to do to her) but none of the replys from her are telling him to cop on.

I confront her on this, admitting i shouldn’t have looked in the 1st place but im glad i did. She admits he kissed her on hols while we were together and she didn’t pull away (blames drink, bollocks i know). Im gutted but i look past it as she was on hols, and i can see her point that telling me would have hurt me, everyone is entitled to a mistake. But it literally smashed my trust in her.

I just couldn’t get my head round her not telling me, even when we had broken up and i asked her specifically during the time she was on hols had she been with anyone else she answered me no.

I began noticing things i hadn’t previously noticed, she made references to guys bods on television, was more adventurous in the bedroom department etc. I met one of the girls she became close to while on hols, and the girl was for want of a better term, mad about the c0ck. She had a cabinet in her apartment dedicated to different toys etc.(very mature isn’t it) basically i wouldn’t be surprised if this girl had words in her ear saying to enjoy herself while she was on holidays.

So anyways , we continue to stay together after the bombshell that another guy had kissed her, but as i said my trust had been smashed and i began to grow apart from her. So i broke it off properly. She was gutted and offered to move to be closer to me, thought we were back on track etc. I tried to explain how the trust carpet had been pulled from under me and i no longer trusted her, i couldn’t help it. She understands and we have been broken up since.

She text me at new years telling me she still thinks about me. I say im glad shes made contact as i do like to hear from her. Saying goodbye to someone i loved soo much was so hard, it was like losing an arm. Now, i don’t know what it is but i cant seem to get past all this. Im thinking of making contact but in the back of my mind im thinking why would i, shes hurt me to a degree i didn’t know was possible, whos to say it wont happen again.
Make contact or continue the break contact here guys?

Im just so confused, i cant eat properly, go drinking a bit, concentration levels are shattered. I have to do something.

Thanks all for reading.

Wibbs

I get the hurt over the trust thing. I do. But if you are good together and put so much energy into this relationship, then it seems a bit mad to lose that over a kiss when you were apart.

LegacyUser

hi wibbs, thank you for your reply.

i know on the outside its just a holiady kiss, but when she left and we decided it was worth staying together, we made a decision not to let someone else get that close to either one of us while we were apart.

if it were me, and some girl decided to kiss me one night, id be telling her to go away, and id be on the phone to the missus faster than you could imagine. but this wasnt a case of some guy, he befriended her, she knew he liked him, it got to the stage where he felt it ok to kiss her, and she keeps up contact with him while still supposedly in a relationship with me. thats not normal behaviour to me, is it? if someone posed a threat to my relationship, the last thing id do is keep in contact with the person. is that just me?

also, when i did find out about the kiss thing, i asked her had she been in contact with him since she came home, she said no, it meant nothing, she had forgotten about it. (and she was pretty convincing too i must say) yet i later find out they kept up contact behind my back. hardly a case of someone she doesnt ever think about it, is it?

and to really drive home the feeling that i was notihng more than a lapdog, safety net type thing for her, i am told that after i break it off with her, hes home for the xmas and wanted to meet up, and she admits that there was an attraction between them all along.

iv gotten less than two hours sleep last night, was bending over with pain in my stomach, it really is the cruelest pain iv ever known.

LegacyUser

im after contacting her and asking her did she carry a torch for him when she got back together with me, as i feel i deserve to know. her response was she doesnt owe me anything. i then asked is she to this day carrying a torch for him, and i got the same answer.
i feel so down

LegacyUser

I hear you bro,
going through similar heartache myself. Chin up

try and stay away from any social network site she has, if any. . i'm looking to occupy myself with things in my day to day life. I suggest you do the same.


Our stories about our ex's are very similar.
Its 2am as I write this and trying not to think about my breakup and the reasons why. My ex wanted to strike up a friendship with a stranger who she met randomly. who openly discussed sex, in which she openly discussed it too with him and it being so obvious he wanted her as well as it becoming unnerving and apprant that "friendship" wasnt what my ex was after. We had a fight over it and she had sex with less than 7 days after the "fight" - Always trust your gut mate... So I know what you are going through. your ex not pushing himaway.


I've read your story and you are perfectly right not to trust her.


I believe in a relationship that yes a girl or guy can talk to who ever they want but at the same time, if a member of the opposite sex is coming onto them and, well quite frankly your OH is "entertaining/welcoming" - wanting to strike a friendship. the idea then there is a problem that you will make the OH uncomfortable. You have every right to feel uncomfortable.

"she doesnt owe me anything" - is the calling card of a person who doesnt care. Judging from that answer too she probably likes the other guy.
You were with her for a while, you were friends as well. If just being honest is asking too much it says alot about her.


chin up
both of us chin up

LegacyUser

hi i_hear_you, thanks for your repsonse.

sorry to hear that you are in a similar situation, on the up side at least i know im not completely bonkers.
myself and herself were texting until all hours lastnite, she told me when we got back together there was not any more contact with yer man as she wanted to make a go of our relationship. to be honest im still iffy on beliing her on that one.
she also said that he emailed her at xmas and she replyed, not answering my "do u still carry a torch for this guy" question, but the way im looking at it is simple, hes emailing her nearly a year on and shes replying, now im aware shes fully entitled to but surely that didnt happen to ressurect again once we broke up right?

of course, in my incredibly vunerable state i was in last nite i also asked her was there any hope of us happening again. she hasnt really answered that one, shes telling me i broke her heart and everything iv said isnt really registering with her. (i told her my head is telling me to move on but the physical pain in my heart is telling a very different story)

call me a love sick puppy or a fool but after all thats happened or didnt happen as the case may be, the thing is i still love her, and if i can get it into my head her feelings for yer man (if there are any real feelings that is) are nothing when compared to her feelings for me (again if there are any left) then i think we stand a chance.

guess iv to wait for the text to come through...

LegacyUser

well the email came through, she said that she doesnt believe me when i say i want to make a proper go of things, im willing to forget or least take the proper steps required to get over this other fella shes maintaining meant nothing. she thinks im just looking for an easy way out of the pain associated with a break up, she says shes been too hurt by our break up to even contemplate getting back together.
i email her back telling her all the things about her i miss, the thoughts i had on our future and my reasoning behind being upset with her over the guy. i also said how i was going to take a step back now, i see that me pressurising her into reconsidering getting back together wasnt going to come to any good in the long run, if things are to happen it has to be wanted on both sides. she replys saying she wants to meet up in the future, but cant guarantee that anything will come of it, and she wishes things were different.
feel like im floggin a dead horse to be honest..
any words of wisedom from any boardsie folks?
iv no idea what im supposed to do next, should i try and get over her, should i wait and see what happens if we were to meet up or should i do what i have been doing..which has so far been nothing? im all over the shop on this one.

Peggypeg

Hey Sweetie,

You really are confused. This woman is laughing up her sleeve at you I think, she certainly doesn't sound like she wants to be in a relationship built on truth and trust and respect.

She's after treating your love like crap and now she's making out you're somehow to blame. Why in the name of god are you sending her lists of things you love about her? I think you are going to realise really soon that you're acting like someone who will put up with anything, I think you're also going to realise how much better you deserve. You sat around waiting for her for MONTHS, she cheated, you forgave her, she won't tell you if she likes the other guy, she doesn't love you sweetie, she just wants to keep all her options open.

You don't sound like a selfish person at all and I know it can be hard to accept that the people you love are, especially when you're not like that yourself. Honestly sweetie, she sounds like she only thinks of herself and what she wants. You need to get a bit angry about this and get some pride to kick so you don't allow that treatment to continue.

Big Big hugs sweetie.

P.s I know the pain your talking about, it will go as soon as you get some closure on this I promise, it might move to your heart for a little while but then you'll get better quicker than you think, someone is out there for you who will threat you the way you deserve.

LegacyUser

hi peggeypeg,
thank you for your reply.

to be honest, ive no idea what possessed me to email her all the things i miss about her, i guess i just needed to write it all down, show her that i may not be the most open person at the best of time, but i see and feel things as much as the next person. i felt almost relived after sending it, i needed to let it be known.

i really hope shes not laughing at me behind my back, i have a feeling that its a case of shes begun to move on, she sees there are other blokes out there, and probably wants to do some living, as far as im aware im her 1st real boyfriend, so maybe she wants to get out there and do what shes gotta do..i could be way off the mark there, i honestly dont know.

i feel like such a sad arse, im moping around waiting for her to reply to my email, send me a text, anything. i know i should be going off and doing something to more constructive to keep my mind off things, but im just not in the mood to yet. its the thought of not having her in my life to that level ever again is just killing me, how sad is that? to share that much with someone only to have it all get pearshaped and deep down knowing this girl does not have the same interest in me anymore is one hell of a punch to take.

i need to get out more

gagomes

There's one thing that stands out, though. You say that her gmail account was open when you first saw the chat from this other guy, but as far as I understand in the follow up posts, you continue to check her email - is this correct? If it is, it sounds like something you should stop immediately, as it will only hurt you even more - not to mention all the moral and privacy related rights you and her are entitled to comply.

I'm grateful I've never been thru such a situation, but you did what was right and I would be proud of taking that step if it ever happened to me. The recovery is long and takes a considerable amount of effort to get back on track. It's difficult not to feel lost, but it's worth the ride as it will allow you to meditate over the bad things and the good, until only the good ones remain and until you find someone new and exciting who will further help you get your life back on track. Don't forget that this might also have been the result of her inexperience with men and neediness due to her being far from you. I would say that you shouldn't reach out to her. You did what was right, you're suffering because you've put all your heart into this relationship, she certainly did suffer to, but the fact that at some point she involved herself with someone else might have made things less bad to her. I would suggest that you try to get sometime to yourself and as someone mention before, that you get yourself busy. Enjoy the time you have on yourself and make something positive out of it. Read a few self-help books, do things you haven't done before and learn to do new things or simply do things differently. Eat healthily, remove any traces of her, quit the drinking, etc. All this can help you get your happiness back, but only you can make it.

LegacyUser

hi gagomes,
thank you for your reply.

when i seen her email, it was because she must have just closed down her laptop without actually logging off, so when i re-opened it, her last page was still there. and thats where i seen his name, a name i had already known beforehand.
yes i did read her message, and yes i know that was completely wrong to do so, but imagine if i didnt, id be driven soft wondering if there was something going on. so because i already had heard of this guys name from when i went to visit her, and becuase i knew he was after her, and i could see the opening line of the email in the titlebox, (which was quite raunchy) i justified my reasoning behind having a look.(basically 9 out of 10 people would have done the same i reckon). i did confront her, i did admit to looking at her message and invading her privacy, but im glad i did, instead of run the risk of being made a fool of. but i have not been looking at her emails since, i havent a clue what her passwords are, nor do i really want to in all honesty.

i appriciate your advice, its just the whole tring to busy myself, i havent a clue how to go about it, nor the motivation to at the moment. i feel stuck, its horrible. i know the general consensus is "get up off your arse" but its not always that easy. iv been thumped quite hard by all this, i feel like im lying on the canvas and i dont have the energy to get up again. i really shoud take the steps of deleting her number, removing her from facebook friends etc, but im too scared to in case she makes contact.

god i need to grow a pair

LegacyUser

and the mind games continue.
shes just after texting me saying how much she loves me and misses me after reading the email i sent her, now i know in my heart and soul shes out drinking and being emotional, and tomorrow im going to get the "i dont even remember sending it" text, but come on like, what am i supposed to do here, ignore text? reply with contact me when ur sober?

wimmins!

saywhatyouwish

You're better off not getting back with this girl.
I got back with my bf after breaking up because he wanted to be with an ex. He was never with her while we were together or broken up and he was in contact with me all the time. He told me he almost met up with her as she wanted to be with him again but he realised he made a mistake and for ages tried to get me back. We are back together a few months now but sometimes its very hard for me to just forget the whole thing. I know any contact with his ex would shatter my trust again but he knows how I feel as I've told him many times. I wasn't even cheated on so I can't imagine how you could just move on so easily from whats happened. Time is making me trust him more but sometimes I can't help but worry that I've put myself up for a fall. You may say you still love her but your relationship wouldn't be the same. Hope you start to feel better soon

Moomoo1

saywhatyouwish wrote: »

You're better off not getting back with this girl.
I got back with my bf after breaking up because he wanted to be with an ex. He was never with her while we were together or broken up and he was in contact with me all the time. He told me he almost met up with her as she wanted to be with him again but he realised he made a mistake and for ages tried to get me back. We are back together a few months now but sometimes its very hard for me to just forget the whole thing. I know any contact with his ex would shatter my trust again but he knows how I feel as I've told him many times. I wasn't even cheated on so I can't imagine how you could just move on so easily from whats happened. Time is making me trust him more but sometimes I can't help but worry that I've put myself up for a fall. You may say you still love her but your relationship wouldn't be the same. Hope you start to feel better soon

I remember you - you were the person whose parents disliked the boyfriend!

I think the only way you move on is through talking, and the OP's ex doesn't seem to be a very good talker... I guess it must be a bit like giving up smoking: one day you resolve to bury the doubts once and for all, and whenever you think about them, just remember your resolution. But if your partner is being vague like she is, it's almost impossible to do that.

LegacyUser

really confused.....is exactly how i am.the sitting around waiting,wondering,moping,not being able to eat,sleep,focus, ugh. My 2cents is give yourself a no contact period,agree on a week or two and then meet up and see where you stand. Im not saying it will work but ive just done this with an ex, after the no contact time i was sure i wanted him back he was sure it was over. Rotten but we know where we stand now. Hope it all works out for you

Gyalist

Moomoo1 wrote: »

I think the only way you move on is through talking, and the OP's ex doesn't seem to be a very good talker... I guess it must be a bit like giving up smoking: one day you resolve to bury the doubts once and for all, and whenever you think about them, just remember your resolution. But if your partner is being vague like she is, it's almost impossible to do that.

Your advice, though clearly well meaning, is only going to prolong the OP's anguish and couldn't poosibly be more unhelpful. In the same way a wound doesn't heal if you keep continually picking at the scab, you don't get over someone by being in regular contact with them. The way to get over someone is to suck it up, stop all contact, and get on with your life.

Gyalist

really confused wrote: »

Hi all, im a fairly regular poster on here but for the purposes of this im going to go unreg for this. I really need some sort of advice/ a telling off/ encouragement, whichever view you take i would like to hear it.

god i need to grow a pair

You really do. If ever there was a post of how not to manage a relationship, this could be it.

Your posts reek of neediness. From going to visit her twice when she was on holidays, to demanding that she moves in with you, to questioning her about her dalliances when she was separated from you. It doesn't surpise me in the least that she didn't want to move in with you and now doesn't want a relationship with you. That sort of behaviour is deeply unattractive.

So what if she makes references to a TV personality's body or that she has a friend who is sexually adventurous? If you see this as a slight on you then I have to tell you that you are in for a world of pain - not just in this relationship, but in any other that you may find yourself in.

really confused wrote: »

and the mind games continue.
shes just after texting me saying how much she loves me and misses me after reading the email i sent her, now i know in my heart and soul shes out drinking and being emotional, and tomorrow im going to get the "i dont even remember sending it" text, but come on like, what am i supposed to do here, ignore text? reply with contact me when ur sober?

wimmins!

She loves you and misses you as a friend. You are clinging to false hope. What you are supposed to do is exercise some emotional self-discipline and break all contact with her. Instead of reading her words, read her actions. That will tell you all that you need to know.

Oh, and if you believe that all she did was kiss the other guy, well, I have a bridge over the Liffey that I'd like to sell to you. She isn't telling you the truth because she knows that you can't handle it.

You have to accept that the relationship is over. You don't trust her and she doesn't like your neediness and jealousy. There is no magic bullet or shortcut that will make you get over her. Break all contact, start an exercise regime (nothing beats exercise for giving you feel-good endorphins) and get busy occupying yourself doing all the things that you have always wanted to but never had the time for.

LegacyUser

hi all, thank you for your replys,

i got a second message about a half hour after going to bed, basically saying she wishes things werent different but knows they are..kind of some form of cop out or retraction of the earlier message received..honestly, if i wasnt hurting i would have laughed at how messed up it all is.

saywhatuwish-
i understand where you are coming from, the first time we broke up and then later got back together, things in the relationship felt very different, well for me at least. then when i found out about the kiss, we talked it through but my trust was gone. it took me a month or so to realise that is was gone and all the while she was thinking everything was fine again. i commend u for sticking through your relationship, i couldnt deal with not knowing really what happened or if they were still in contact, so i tried to do us both a favour and ended it.

moomoo1-
she is usually a good talker, but given the fact i sent her an email going on about everything i miss about her and the fact she didnt even send me a message to say shes read it,(we text each other to say theres an emailing waiting if we send/read an email sent to one another) or in fact reply in any way to that email until late last night in that 1st message she sent saying shes read it and still loves me, im beginning to realise the advantages of

hurts's advice-
wherby cut the cord a wee bit and not bother replying, sending messages. i feel like a safety net, she knows im there if she needs a bit of "i love u" when shes out or something.

gyalist-
thank you for your imput. i honestly dont see the neediness, my OP should have read of one full of love for somebody, as thats exactly what it was. the 1st time i visited her i was travelling myself, so of course id want to see the girl i love on the other side of the world, who for the months prior to that my only contact to her was through skype/messages/emails. then the 2nd trip was at xmas when she said she couldnt imagine xmas without me, nor i her. love, not needy, or maybe they are 2 of the same. i feel im well within my right to question her dillances if shes supposed to be in a relationship with me and i find out there is someone else on the scene. i dont think distance or timezones should allow one person to go off and be with someone else. she used never make references to half naked man bods on tv, for the very same reason i would never make a reference to some girls rack on tv in front of her-its called respect. im no prude, but save the talk for when you are out with your mates is how i roll. as far as i know, if fellas were to go on about some girls rack on the tv in front of their OH, the OH isnt going to turn around and say "god im so lucky i have u" and actually mean it. so why should it be any different when a guys bod appears on the box?

you are right, my hope is feeling false right now. i am going to try and break all contact, i havent replyed to her messages lastnight so theres a 1st step taken. you might have to give a quote on that bridge so because i honestly dont believe she would do more than kiss the other guy. nieve? maybe i am. if its less hurtful to think there was nothing more to it than a kiss, then ill stick with that one.

thank you all again for all your replys, one messed up bucko over here.

Moomoo1

Gyalist wrote: »

Your advice, though clearly well meaning, is only going to prolong the OP's anguish and couldn't poosibly be more unhelpful. In the same way a wound doesn't heal if you keep continually picking at the scab, you don't get over someone by being in regular contact with them. The way to get over someone is to suck it up, stop all contact, and get on with your life.

do you have a better way of dealing with trust issues whilst staying in the relationship?

Gyalist

Moomoo1 wrote: »

do you have a better way of dealing with trust issues whilst staying in the relationship?

What relationship? The OP is not in a relationship with his ex.

Moomoo1

Gyalist wrote: »

What relationship? The OP is not in a relationship with his ex.

yes, but he left it because of trust issues

anyway, I did say that until she starts being totally honest with him there is no way forward.

LegacyUser

hi all again,
to be honest with u moomoo, if there was more to the story, i really cant see her telling it to me at this stage, which hurts i know. but hey, shes missing out on one genuine buck over here as far as im concerned, i dont know one other redblooded male who would stay faithful to a girl for 15 months straight while shes off on hols.
maybe she will go off, do whatever living she needs doing, and one day wake up and realise yeah, that lad that offered her his heart wasnt actaully all that bad.

Moomoo1

really confused wrote: »

hi all again,
to be honest with u moomoo, if there was more to the story, i really cant see her telling it to me at this stage, which hurts i know. but hey, shes missing out on one genuine buck over here as far as im concerned, i dont know one other redblooded male who would stay faithful to a girl for 15 months straight while shes off on hols.
maybe she will go off, do whatever living she needs doing, and one day wake up and realise yeah, that lad that offered her his heart wasnt actaully all that bad.

the way you talked on here suggests that there is more to her story, eg all the 'carrying the torch' stuff. You also seemed to imply that part of the problem is that you didn't believe her explanation(s).

Do you think that it's the uncertainty that kills you here more than what she actually did? Like, if she had come clean and said 'yes, I do have feelings for the other person, but I decided to pursue a relationship with you' (like the OH of saywhatyouwish did), then things would be (more or less) ok?

LegacyUser

to a degree i guess i dont fully believe her explainations, she gave me reason to believe that it was a once off kiss from someone she barely even knew. but i had already known of this fella, and the fact that he liked her. it was only down the line she admitted she liked getting his attention, and then further down the line she admits to not pulling away from the kiss.
she kept it minimal at the beginning, it wanst until i probed for an answer the revelations begun to emerge.

so i guess it is the uncertainty in that sense, her not telling me anything until i find out for myself, followed by what hopefully is nearer the truth once i began questioning it, leads me to wonder how far can this one be trusted at tall?

if she had just come clean about things in the first place, id be more willing to accept it and move on, i can understand a holiday kiss. but it was the method i found out that really killed my trust. am i making any sense?

LegacyUser

well, i got the email saying she still doesnt believe that i want back into the relationship for the right reasons, she maintains that when i broke it off it her it really hurt her and she doesnt think she can ever feel the same way about me.

got that email nearly a week ago, took the usual steps one takes, deleted every "i love message" i saved on my phone, every email she ever sent me, didnt have the heart to delete the pics i have of us.

i never thought getting over someone would be this hard, its nearly 3 months on and yet still every moment i have to myself i think about her. isnt supposed to get easier and not harder with time?

this is brutle altogether.

LegacyUser

OP,

Firstly let me apologize for the long post. I wish you well on your journey to getting over this woman. Its a journey, not a destination.

Secondly I am in a similar position. The girl who I loved dumped me when I was having family issues, and then she gets back in contact recently. Wanting sex, and stuff (I declined, keeping that self-respect!). When I contact her (like an IDIOT!) her replys are curt. Shes a selfish so and so. I was too good to her (in more ways than one )

Now, down to business.

With regards to your situation, BREAK ALL CONTACT IMMEDIATELY. Logically, ask yourself, what good is it that you are contacting her back? Do you want one of those fairy-tale endings? This is life man, it doesn't happen like that. The less respect you have for yourself, the less she will have for you. ALTHOUGH, should you take a time out, AT LEAST 4 MONTHS to yourself, you will get on the road to recovery. Play it like a little game, where each day you don't contact her, you acknowledge it, and feel some pride in it.

Realise that you have broken up, and while it is nice to look on the past with a certain fondness, remember that you guys broke up for a reason. Look to the future with openness!

I'm a firm believer in actions speak louder than words. Have her words felt more convincing than her actions? (It was the case in my situation). If so, realize that it is speech play on her part.

Women are great, I love women, but they have a tendency to talk to us after a relationship ends. This is what confuses us men.

Take up exercise, (do it tonight- go for a walk!), better yourself so you feel more confident in yourself, and more, BETTER women will like you. Break contact with her - don't give a reason, and feel good about it!! No emotional turmoil! Who knows, in a few years down the line, she will see the new, improved you! Or you could have a queen already. But not till you rid yourself of your nostalgia.

Do what I tell you, and after a week, you will feel noticeably better.

Thats an order, soldier!

D.I. Magnum