Issues With Housemate

Kuz_3040

Hello all been a while since I've posted here. Happy new year to all.

Background
Moved into a new build apartment back in september and moved in with a guy I've never previously lived with. The build quality of the apartment is not great at all.

This causes an issue with noise, basically when I'm in my bedroom I can hear everything in the open plan lounge and even my housemate when he is in his bedroom.

Problem
He for some obscure reason likes to have his friends come over way after midnight. I (like most people I think) like to be asleep at this time. The problem is that when his friends come over at this time, I get woken up by the noise.

I always end having to tell them to keep the noise down which he does try to do. I have even tried using earplugs and they have made very little difference.

He has categorically said he will not stop having his friends come over. His argument is that he is paying half the rent so he is entitled to have his friends come round. We have had many conversations about this and we cant seem to find a solution to the problem.

My suggestion has been that he should not let them stay past a certain time which again he has refused to do.

Does anyone have any ideas what I can do because I have a feeling this can go down a very ugly road.

Thanks in advance


Khurram

Wow, he sounds like a selfish so-and-so. Entitled to make noise past midnight because he's paying half the rent? I've heard it all now. Someone that deluded is probably not going to listen to reason, so you could try turning up your music on full blast and banging around at 7am and see how he likes it. Or just move out? There is nothing worse than being kept awake at night.

dudara

Of course he is entitled to have friends over to visit BUT he has to show some consideration to you (as likewise you would have to show to him).

Frankly, friends visiting after midnight is ridiculous. You've tried to reason with him and failed, so the next step would be to contact your landlord.

Kuz_3040

Sadly I would rather not blast my music that loud because than I'd be sinking to his level. The strange thing is that he agrees with me one minute but then (this is purely speculation) his friends will whisper to him and he will change his mind.

I cant move out till June and I'd rather not move out because the location of the place is incredibly conviennient for me as it is minutes away from uni.

Its not even that they blast music or anything so extreme. They will simply be having a conversation or smoking shisha or eating. But because of the poor build quality of the flat it feels like they are in my room.

I'd rather not contact my landlord because it is through a letting agents and basically they are incompetant (thats an understatement).

dolliemix

OP you need to talk to the Landlord. You will go insane otherwise and it will start eating into your work/study. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture. I know this might sound OTT but there's nothing worse than lying in bed at night wrecked but just getting more and more annoyed.

Your flatmate is extremely selfish. You've done your best to approach the matter calmly and fairly. He is showing you no respect so you don't need to show him any in return.

Abi

Kuz_3040 wrote: »

Its not even that they blast music or anything so extreme. They will simply be having a conversation or smoking shisha or eating.

I'd rather not contact my landlord because it is through a letting agents and basically they are incompetant (thats an understatement).

This is a slightly better situation than having to deal with the landlord in my opinion. Why don't you speak to the agency? I don't mean to nit-pick, but not only does he keep anti-social hours, they are smoking hash in the apartment. Not to say this bothers you personally, but I'm pretty sure it would be frowned upon by the letting agency / landlord.

Kuz_3040

Kuz_3040 wrote: »

Sadly I would rather not blast my music that loud because than I'd be sinking to his level.

It worked for me once. It took me giving her a taste of her own medicine to make her realise how obnoxious she was. Before that she had convinced herself I was just anal and fussy. Even people talking in a normal voice is too loud for most apartments these days. What I also did with my obnoxious, selfish flatmate (after months of pleading her to be considerate) was knock on her door one night while she had friends there and have her come into my room and see for herself how loud it was. It felt like they were all in my room. Nobody can sleep through that kind of noise, and people talking is one of the most annoying noises when you're trying to sleep. I can sleep through noisy traffic, horns, sirens, bathroom fans, but not people talking.

Kuz_3040

Well I've played music when I wake up on the morning to show him what its like and I've also had him go into my room and see what its like. Both have made very little difference.

As for the agency option as I said they are incompetant and would more than likely tell me where to go or would do nothing about it. My previous dealing with them in the past have never gone well. They arent actually smoking hash its just flavoured tobacco.

Even if I did go to the landlord what could they do anyway???

Victor

Are you renting a room or are you jointly renting the apartment?

Do you have a lease or a licence to live there?

Kuz_3040

Victor wrote: »

Are you renting a room or are you jointly renting the apartment?

Do you have a lease or a licence to live there?

We are jointly renting the apartment and it is a lease.

Ms. Ka

I have been down this road as well with an incredibly ignorant housemate. He repeatedly had his friends over a crazy times at night, myself or other flatmates would say go out to them and tell them to keep it down or we would said it to him the next day. He was always apologetic or he would hide in his room until he thought I was less angry. Nothing ever changed no matter what he promised, I hate to say it but moving out is proably your only option.

dudara

You are sitting and accepting it rather than dealing with it.

As a tenant you have rights. Contact the letting agency and ask them to deal with it. There's probably something in your contract about being considerate of other tenants.

If the letting agency don't do anything about it, then go to the landlord.

You are only prolonging this agony for yourself if you don't deal with it. If you move out, you're just leaving the problem for someone else.

Kuz_3040

I cant move out because all the bills etc are in my name and I cant ask him to leave because I cant afford the rent on my own.

The worst part is in some karmaic way it is my own fault because the only reason I decided to live with him was because it was financially advantageous for me.

Ok dudara I will speak to my letting agents and I'll also have a flick through my lease to see if there is anything in there

Victor

Potentially make a complaint with the landlord / agency that the soundproofing is inadequate and contrary to the lease.

Are there any measure you can take to reduce the sound transmission? Put your wardrobe on the noise side of the room and furniture on the bedroom side of the living room. In the living room, position seating and TV (is this an issue) away from your room. add artwork / carpets to dull the sound.

mood

I would just move out and move in with people who keep similar house in work/college. I would be more picky where you rent in future.

Can you not get your name off the bills? It shouldn't be a problem.

Pinkpuppy

Oh god apartments are awful,i know exactly how you feel. I used to live with my friends in one,myself and one friend shared a room because we were always up round 6. The other two were up at 8 or 9. One girl sometimes used to bring friends over late before they headed out. Now they were never excessively noisy but my bed was right against the living room wall so i heard everythin and with being up at 6,being kept awake until 2or 3 used to set me off. Perhaps have a very stern chat,even compromise maybe to keep th visits until a thurs or fri? Could you sleep with an i pod in your ears? Then you hear the music n not their banter. Could you arrange with him that the volume of tv doesn't go above a certain volume. Apart from all this the letting agent is your other avenue,or else move out?

Pinkpuppy

Sorry about no paragraphs there. Was writing reply on my phone and it's impossible to get paragraphs on it. Also thought my reply would be much smaller.

cafecolour

Ipod w/ music works better than just earplugs. Something like classical that's not going to get your energy going.

Is his room any farther from the living room? Could you possible switch rooms?

Colours

OP may I suggest that you use ear plugs? I have had experiences very similar to your own before and ear plugs really helped to dampen out the noice pretty much altogether. I use the spongy type ones and still do if there is some noise in the backround like a loud air conditioner or loud noises outside for example road works or a house alarm that's gone off.

I think you are right not to start playing to music loudly yourself to try to teach him a lesson as it would probably cause your housemate to dig his heels in and defind his right more stubbornly to have friends back at any hour of the night / morning and what's more he might even start making more noise to get his own back and thus make matters worse.

I don't think that is much you can do in terms of approaching a landlord or letting agendt to intervene here as it is his perogative if he wants to have friends back every hour on the hour. Perhaps you could look into whether there are products you can get like foam board your could put along your adjoining wall to sound proof the partition between you a bit more.

magneticimpulse

Talk to your landlord, tell him your housemate is having crazy parties after midnight everynight. Your landlord should take action and kick him out!! Call the police if you have to! Just to get your point across. Do any of the neighbours complain?? Have they come knocking at the door? If so, tell the landlord all the neighbours are complaining too. There is somebody who owns this flat and paying a mortgage on it and there are people paying mortgages on the flats around your one...so im sure they are not happy with this guy having parties everynight.!! They will be glad to kick him out.

pookie82

I lived with students/peers for years in rented situations and encountered lots of this. One year was particularly bad - I was doing a very demanding postgrad with early classes, dissertations and constant exams and most nights of the week one of my housemates would bring his entire gang back to ours to smoke themselves silly and play music at high volumes in the sitting room, which was right beneath my bedroom.

I asked nicely and tried to be civil on many occasions but all to no avail. So one night I marched down to the sitting room and demanded that everyone who didn't live there left immediately. At first they were reluctant to move but I threatened to call landlady/guards etc and they pi*sed off eventually. I repeated this several nights in a row until eventually they just stopped bothering to show up and found some other poor sucker's house to hang out in.

If you go into the living room and demand that anyone who isn't a resident leaves as you're not comfortable with them there, my guess is that unless they're incredibly obnoxious they'll eventually get up and go. This will undoubtedly cause lots of agro between you and your flatmate but I don't really see another way out of it unless you move.

LegacyUser

i dont think you should go to your landlord as this guy is your pal. Have a chat with him. Tell him that you lived there first and that he knew you were working when he moved and that this cant go on? Maybe limit it to the weekends? tell him you dont want to fall out with him but you need your sleep for work and he would do the same in your circumstances

If that doesnt work then have a talk with his friends or hint to them that you need sleep. As the poster above says you could start kicking them out

Kuz_3040

Thanks to everyone for responding. I have read over the various comments and I have come to the conclusion that the problem is more to do with the soundproofing inadequacies of the flat itself. I can actually hear the water in the pipes when he turns the tap on in his bathroom

I have had many conversations with my housemate about this and every solution we have come to has failed miserably including reorganising the room, ear plugs etc.

I think my solution will be to take action against my landlord and the letting agents.

Again I thank everyone for there assistance


Khurram