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Left behind

  • 03-01-2010 7:56am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi Everyone,

    Ill get straight into it. I have been with my gf for about 10 years. Great year’s tbh. All I ever cared about was her and our child and they are all I ever wanted. Since she gave birth, we have never really gone out for a night and that didn’t bother me until about 6 months ago when she started going out with her friends. I want to see her enjoy herself and I know she does, but I would like to be able to share in the experience once in a while.

    She goes out with her girlfriends and I would feel out of place tagging along with them, I don’t know most of them for starters! I would go out with my own friends if I had any. I seem to have lost my own friends because when I met my gf, we moved away for 6 months and then back home but I never got in touch with any of my old friends. That was 8 years ago.

    I love to see her go out and enjoy herself but I can’t help feeling lonely for myself at the same time. I want to go with her too but she has told me that she would not be able to enjoy herself the same way if I was present (not in those words but that was the meaning of it). I don’t really know what advice I am looking for. Anyone in a similar situation?


Comments

  • #2
    Kimia
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭Kimia


    Hi Op. I have been in the same situation but as the gf. I think what she's trying to tell you is to get some independance. You sound like such a lovely guy but you're living your entire life through your gf and child, which is nice but I really would suggest you do something for yourself too.

    Do you play sports? Maybe investigate joining a team locally. Or try and contact your old friends - so what if it's been 8 years!

    Get out of the bubble you're in and try and develop your own life a little bit, then you won't be so dependant on your gf.

    But one thing did strike me as odd - how is it you don't know any of her friends? You're together 10 years! :confused:


  • #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    She obviously feels a bit under pressure as she is your only social outlet. Why not even join an evening class one evening a week to give her some space... I love having th house to myself even for a few hours and maybe she needs this too...

    Build up your own life with a few to having interesting stuff you can both talk about other than your kid.


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