Stood up

LegacyUser

Hi. I right now am meant to be our with my boyfriend. He rang me from a pub two hours ago and told me to get all done up that we were going somewhere nice with his friends to celebrate one of the girls we work with birthday (whose single and wanted to find herself a man tonight) I don't know her that well but i said fine and started getting ready. He rang me half an hour into getting ready to see my progress and i told him it'll be another half hour and asked him to ring me back to tell me where to go when they found a place. It was meant to be at 21:30 we were meeting, and it's now 22:10, he won't answer the phone he's just letting it ring out, and there's no sign of the call.

I got ready, hair, make up, clothes. Am sitting here like a fool on my own waiting on a call. And I feel so terrible.

How am I meant to go out now? I'm angry and annoyed and I don't know what I'm going to say to him IF he rings because I feel like exploding.

Advice anyone please?

sporina

relax - there is possibly a good explanation...

how are things between ye in general? has he ever done this before? does he mess you around? how long ye going out? all these things will help keep some perspective..

LegacyUser

together 2 years. He's still a mystery at times despite this!

He;s not the type to mess me about. I'm starting to think he's forgotten about me though.

there's been a couple of occasions where he hasn't come home , he's got so drunk sometimes he's slept on other peoples' floors type thing.... But i'm thinking he can't really be that drunk at this stage it's almost too early.

I am beginning to get worried that something has happened now though.

sporina

do you have a number for anyone he is out with? do you know where he was when he got in touch with you? if so you could try calling there..

Chucky the tree

Jesus, I'd be more worried somethings happened to him rather then being stood up.

Same.....unless he has a habit of doing this, I'd be more worried than angry, tbh. Why would you assume he's stood you up?

LegacyUser

I just went to all the pubs we live near, and then finally down to the pub near work (the bar guys know us all there) and the guy said that he left with the girl (Whose birthday it is) and the rest of the guys are there. They said they don't know where the two of them went but that they weren't going out because it's lashing out and they're all happy where they are.

So now I'm back home now, nearly crashed the car on the way in. I'm worried and slightly suspicious now. I rang her also and there's no answer from her phone either.

LegacyUser

Are you sure only the 2 of them left? If so, I would be pretty p'd off that he didnt answer the phone.

dellas1979

Yikes - you mustve gotton a fright.

Give benefit of the doubt until you know whats happened.

He may well have intended on heading home and got caught up somewhere.

mylittlepony

Hope everything ok.

Magenta

stooduphorror wrote: »

I just went to all the pubs we live near, and then finally down to the pub near work (the bar guys know us all there) and the guy said that he left with the girl (Whose birthday it is) and the rest of the guys are there. They said they don't know where the two of them went but that they weren't going out because it's lashing out and they're all happy where they are.

So now I'm back home now, nearly crashed the car on the way in. I'm worried and slightly suspicious now. I rang her also and there's no answer from her phone either.

Did he leave alone with the girl, or with the rest of the group too?

fend

+1 on did he leave with JUST her?

When he finally does make contact, play dumb... ask him where he was etc... See if he mentions that he left with her alone [if that indeed is the case...] take note of times etc... For example see if he says ah yea was in the pub til about 12 etc etc.... See what he says!

And keep us filled!

Overheal

stooduphorror wrote: »

I just went to all the pubs we live near, and then finally down to the pub near work (the bar guys know us all there) and the guy said that he left with the girl (Whose birthday it is) and the rest of the guys are there. They said they don't know where the two of them went but that they weren't going out because it's lashing out and they're all happy where they are.

So now I'm back home now, nearly crashed the car on the way in. I'm worried and slightly suspicious now. I rang her also and there's no answer from her phone either.

Okay before we go running a red light or sideswiping a sedan lets remember that when driving your focus needs to be on driving not on emotional and relationship topics.

magneticimpulse

that story is so strange. any clearer as to what happened?

LegacyUser

Hi thanks for the replies.

He arrived home at 6 in the morning. He fell asleep on her couch. I got no more details from there. He said he didn't even remember leaving the pub, they were doing shots, and from that moment on everything was hazy. We didn't speak too much more about it, but I will do, as soon as everything at work calms down (we're quite busy) .

I do not think he cheated on me, but I don't know , with what I'm reading on this forum some other people seem to have had similar situations and plan not to tell their other halves about it... So i worry about it.

But there's nothing I Can do but wait and see until we have a chat about it again.

Thanks again for the posts. I appreciate the help.

ziedth

sounds very suss to me op. At the very least he's treated you like a doormat, i wouldn't leave it go too likely. Best me luck!

dellas1979

Like - whats his relationship with this girl?
Fair play to you for not loosing the rag.

LegacyUser

Fair play to you for not losing the rag. Even if nothing happened his actions are totally disrepectful of your relationship. I had a similar situation happen to me once. Was nearly in tears with worry about my ex then finally managed to get in touch with him.... he was asleep, hungover. It was the straw that broke the camels back and I dumped him. If he's serious about the relationship he shouldn't be acting like that.

fend

If shoe was on the other foot, and you rang him at 9pm the previous night asking him to make his way down tot he pub, and when he got there, you had taken off with another fella and slept back in his til 6 in the morning....

Do you think he would be as calm and collective as you? Well done OP on keeping your cool.... But in all fairness, not acceptable behavior

magneticimpulse

sounds very crap. he thought more of her then you. whether he slept with her or not, the fact is, he was still more concerned that she got back to her place safely, but didnt give a 2nd thought about where you were or if you got home safe. totally would not stand for being treated like a doormat...