Skanky GF!!

Username101

Hey ya, just trying to blow off some steam with this post but maybe wouldnt mind peoples input on this too!

Basically I arrived home after a few days away to the house that I was sharing with my girlfriend and found an open condom wrapper beside the bed, she was with me in the room when I found this and you might expect that after being caught rotten like that she might start to be honest about how it got there, only she has since told me about a hundred different stories as to how it got there -

1 - first she said that she simply didnt know how it got there. There was only two people in the house while I was away, her and her uncle.

2 - She then decided that it was her uncle that has used it with someone and had obviously went snooping around our room to find the condom. Unfortunately her uncle had absolutely nothing to do with the condom and that I can guarantee near 100%.

3 - She then decided once again that she knew nothing about it, after a short time she 'admitted' that she had used it to put over a sex toy cause of hygiene and she didnt say before cause she was embarrassed.

4 - She said then after that this wasnt true and that she didnt know how it got there. After more arguing she told me that she couldnt tell me as she was embarrassed about it, she then told me that she would tell me everything after she went for a walk.

5 - After her walk she came back and told me that she had slept with her ex while I was away.

6 - The next day she told me that she made that up to finish the issue and that it wasnt true, that she didnt know anything about the condom and she hadnt used it.

7 - The next day she said again that it was actually her that used it and that it was with her ex.

8 - She said again about an hour later that it wasnt true and that she didnt know anything about it once again.

What a farce! What the hell is going on? The more that it goes on like this the more annoyed I am becoming because basically I feel that either she thinks I am an absolute idiot, or else she is taking the mick completely. Needless to say the relationship is done, but I think I would like to know what kind of craic has been going on in the room that I slept in every night!

This isnt the only dodgy bit of behaviour from her, another time she was texting a man over 10 years older that her who she worked with, a married man. She used work late in a bar, one night she said she got a lift home from him and his wife, later she denied altogether that she ever got a lift from him at all!! I wouldnt give too many more examples cause I'll make myself look a bigger eejit. The condom one is the one that I want to get to the bottom of though, I feel like she could be covering something crazy altogether! If its true that she would make up a story of sleeping with her ex to finish the issue then the truth must be crazy altogether!!

What do people think?

keane2097

The thread title is your answer there mate - she's a skank.

You'd be better off single.

EDIT:

No point worrying about what happened while you were away - what can you possibily find out that's gonna make you feel any better?

wylo

She probably did sleep with the ex.She sounds like an absolute disaster and you made the right decision to leave. Someone like that deserves no one imo.
Lucky escape by you.

The Big Red Button

She seems to be a compulsive liar, and it's pretty clear she's been unfaithful to you - but it's a bit pointless to torture yourself by trying to figure out where/when/with whom.

My advice would be to cut ALL contact and move on.

Username101

Cheers, I know I should probably just leave this all well alone, but I guess Im a glutten for punishment, I feel I would need to have even a vague idea of what was going on before I can reconcile myself with it all, I just hate looking and feeling like a complete tool over this

keane2097

Username101 wrote: »

Cheers, I know I should probably just leave this all well alone, but I guess Im a glutten for punishment, I feel I would need to have even a vague idea of what was going on before I can reconcile myself with it all, I just hate looking and feeling like a complete tool over this

You really ought to try and get out of this frame of mind.

It's not going to help how you feel by finding out.

It was another man, that's all that you really need to know...

Eve_Dublin

What do I think? I think what you think: your girlfriend is a cheating skank and your right to dump her. I have no time for cheaters, even as friends. Despicable, disgusting, unforgivable behaviour and they deserve everything that's coming to them.

I'm sorry for the situation you're in. It must be horrible.

Username101

Ya it is pretty disasterous, here the story gets better! We are well set up together is an apartment where I am really quite happy, and we have a baby together. Now the way I see it is that she has gone off and had her bit of fun, which she isnt even decent enough to be honest about, and instead of her suffering for it its me who will have to lose the apartment, the baby everything! I would be a million times better off if it was me cheating. I dont know what to do next

Eve_Dublin

Username101 wrote: »

Cheers, I know I should probably just leave this all well alone, but I guess Im a glutten for punishment, I feel I would need to have even a vague idea of what was going on before I can reconcile myself with it all, I just hate looking and feeling like a complete tool over this

I understand that. I think I'd want to know what went on and I think you're owed some honesty at the very least so you can begin the process of getting over her.The full story will come out eventually.

My goodness, I can be very sanctimonious and black and white at the best of times but I don't get this kind of behaviour. Unforgivable. Really sorry OP.

Username101

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

I understand that. I think I'd want to know what went on and I think you're owed some honesty at the very least so you can begin the process of getting over her.The full story will come out eventually.

My goodness, I can be very sanctimonious and black and white at the best of times but I don't get this kind of behaviour. Unforgivable. Really sorry OP.

Thanks for the support. It just keeps getting better and better, she has put up posts on boards in the past giving out about cheating and one night stands and stuff like that, so we could add 'hypocrite' to the list of descriptive terms for her.

dudara

OP - I just noticed that you have a duplicate thread on this matter in After Hours. Please do not start duplicate threads on a topic on Boards.

dudara

Deedsie

Hoochy hoochy hoochy

Wagon

Username101 wrote: »

What do people think?

Shagged her ex or some randomer. Simple as that.

She's a fúckin eejit. There's no other words to describe her. I knew someone fairly similar. Belive me, it seems to only get worse from here. Just get the hell away from her to keep your sanity tbecause i can 100% gaurentee she'll try and keep you around as backup.

dudara

Deedsie wrote: »

Hoochy hoochy hoochy

Deedsie, if you can't post anything helpful, then please don't post. Take the time to read the PI/RI charters for further information.

dudara

zootroid

She sounds like a compulsive liar, and to be honest even if you found out the truth (which might be difficult considering she sounds like a liar) would you really want to? It won't make you feel any better, you know that she cheated, so just get rid, and don't do anything else. You will come out of it looking better then.

krudler

Well she's either a cheater or a liar, both as bad as each other tbh, get rid of her. If shes a cheater, then she doesnt deserve you, if shes a liar, then shes an idiot, who says they slept with someone else to "explain" a condom wrapper?! the sex toy thing is at least plausible, what a bitch

girl2

Hi OP

I feel so sorry for you and for your baby. Regardless of what has happened, her treatment towards you is a disgrace, as is she. I would say she was with the guy (whoever) and she wanted to test the water to see what your reaction would be by telling you. Then she goes and retracts it. She's just torturing you.

And you yourself are torturing you. Sometimes in life you just have to understand that youre never going to find out the truth, or ever know what really happened. I know how hard it is to try and accept this, but its the only way youre going to be able to get over.

And the thing with liars is that they will go to any lengths - they dont see any harm in it, even thought the lies might crucify another person. Theyre usually so so used to lying that it doesnt matter how big or small the lie is, its just a normal part of life for them. For 'normal' people, we dont think like this. Lies are lies and when it gets to the stage that you dont know what the truth is, you will question everything. (I know cos Ive been there). So even if she does tell you that shes going to tell you everything - youre never going to know what the truth is, because she doesnt know how to tell the truth.

Hope youre ok OP, especially at this time of the year. Please try to just concentrate on getting through this and looking after your baby.

Good luck.

The Sweeper

OP, nobody makes up "I slept with my ex" as an excuse. That part is the truth. The bit where she goes "I lied about sleeping with my ex" is her reaction to YOUR reaction to "I slept with my ex".

Give it up and move on. You won't get vindication or closure or anything useful to you out of apologies or explanations at this stage. Cut contact for 48 hours and go spend time with a friend. After a few days she may have her story straight in her head. Best case, she tells you the truth and then you decide what to do. Worst case, she fixes on "I don't know how it got there", in which case you know the relationship is over.

Just one point - it's not a good idea to go calling the mother of your child "a skank". Whatever happens, you are tied to this woman until your child is grown, and you will have to speak to her week in, week out; and have to pay maintenance for your child. You are permitted to be angry, of course, and upset. Just try to rise above it, and steer clear of the name calling and bitter resentment - or over the years you'll become just one more parent of an utterly fucked up kid.

abceire

i d just have no contact with her and move on
i ve a mate who broke up with his ex over a year ago,he s still worrying will she be in ireland for xmas or not and will she have her new bf with her, he s been with tonnes of girls since his ex but not given any a chance cause he still hanging onto ex, sooner you break all contact from this girl the better i d say, who cares who she cheated with,she cheated thats enough to know