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Handy hint: ashes and ice

  • 24-12-2009 11:00am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,819 ✭✭✭✭


    Just in case you didn't know:
    The fine ashes from your open fire / woodburner make fine replacement for salt when sprinkled on icy footpaths.
    It won't thaw the ice, but it will give enough traction not to break your neck on your way through your slippery front garden.

    This was a public service broadcast, brought to you from the department of semi-useful facts


Comments

  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 14,324 CMod ✭✭✭✭The Master


    Here's a tip: put a pinch of sage in your boots, and all day
    long a spicy scent is your reward.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,015 ✭✭✭Paddy Samurai


    Survival hint for the festive season

    If you shoot yourself in the head with a Silver Bullet , werewolves can't harm you.

    Ps: bullet has to be silver or it does'nt work.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,383 ✭✭✭emeraldstar


    peasant wrote: »
    Just in case you didn't know:
    The fine ashes from your open fire / woodburner make fine replacement for salt when sprinkled on icy footpaths.
    It won't thaw the ice, but it will give enough traction not to break your neck on your way through your slippery front garden.

    This was a public service broadcast, brought to you from the department of semi-useful facts
    Would look fairly mank though.


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 14,324 CMod ✭✭✭✭The Master


    Even better tip for the use of bullets over the festive season:

    Go outside late on christmas eve and shoot once into the air

    Go back inside and inform your children that Santa has committed suicide and there will be no presents this year


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,315 ✭✭✭Big Knox


    peasant wrote: »
    Just in case you didn't know:
    The fine ashes from your open fire / woodburner make fine replacement for salt when sprinkled on icy footpaths.
    It won't thaw the ice, but it will give enough traction not to break your neck on your way through your slippery front garden.

    This was a public service broadcast, brought to you from the department of semi-useful facts

    Handy Hint: P1ss and Ice

    Just in case you didn't know:
    The fine p1ss from your full bladder make fine replacement for snow cones when p1ssed on frosty ground.
    It won't thaw the ice, but it will give it a lightly glowing yellow tinge so you can make p1ss cones and share them with your unsuspecting friends.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,124 ✭✭✭✭My name is URL


    If you wear your socks over your shoes you'll have more traction on slippery surfaces, but look like a tard


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,756 ✭✭✭InkSlinger67


    So this thread is going to turn into a lot of Viz-related top tips then!

    Here's my two cents.....Save all your old toenail clippings as they make good replacements for woodchip wallpaper


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 942 ✭✭✭whadabouchasir


    peasant wrote: »
    This was a public service broadcast, brought to you from the department of semi-useful facts
    any chance this department might give us some facts relevant to this century


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭4zn76tysfajdxp


    A stitch in time saves nine.


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,996 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    A bird in the hand gathers no moss.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 916 ✭✭✭Bloody Nipples


    Fúck the fire ashes! Gran is going on the footpath!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,918 ✭✭✭✭orourkeda


    any chance this department might give us some facts relevant to this century

    Ice is slippy. Dont walk on it


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,044 ✭✭✭gcgirl


    If you shag some one standing up you WILL get pregnant :)


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 10,598 Mod ✭✭✭✭Robbo


    Pretend that fun sized Mars Bars are regular Mars Bars to feel like a giant.

    Regular Mars Bars make ideal fun sized Mars Bars for giants.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,658 ✭✭✭old boy


    gcgirl wrote: »
    If you shag some one standing up you WILL get pregnant :)

    me thinks i wont


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Don't wipe your willy on the curtains..... that's just rude.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 252 ✭✭kiad


    A stitch in time saves two in the bush


  • Moderators, Education Moderators, Motoring & Transport Moderators Posts: 7,396 Mod ✭✭✭✭**Timbuk2**


    Don't drink and drive - you might spill your pint.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,243 ✭✭✭truecrippler


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    Don't wipe your willy on the curtains..... that's just rude.

    Yeah, considering that the first thing my parents got rid of in my room when I left home were my curtains. Was highly embarrassing.


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