Can't Orgasm

LegacyUser

Hi I'm writing this because I have sex with my boyf at leat 7 times a week and I have never been able to orgasm I really love it and it feels great (especially fingering) but I just can't "release" .. I feel as though I'm about to pee or something. I just don't know. He cums every time without fail and I think he's given up trying at this stage and it's really upsetting me. Is this normal?

Btw I'm 19 and we've been having sex for the past 2 years. Could it be a case where I may never be able to orgasm?

I was on ro-accutane about 4 years ago if that has anything to do with it

Thanks

1071823928

yeh im the same just cant relax enough, my friend said you just have to relax completely and get past the whole i feel like im gona piss myself feeling and then your grand!
never worked for me tho!

G-Money

I've actually heard of this before. I'm not a woman so I don't know what it's like, but when you feel that sensation, you kind of just need to relax and sort of push. Don't worry, you're not going to pee everywhere. If you are really paranoid, go before heading into the bedroom etc.

As I understand it, if you just relax and push, you're in for an almighty amount of pleasure. Enjoy

nkay1985

Hey OP. There's probably an element of you not allowing yourself to release but there could also be an issue with what your boyfriend is doing for you.

How long would foreplay last before you go into penetrative sex? What does this foreplay involve? Does he ever perform oral sex on you?

Learn how to do it for yourself so you can get passed that mental block.. Then you can let your bf know what works and what doesn't.

Miss Fluff

That feeling of wanting to pee is normally what happens with a G-spot/vaginal orgasm, it is not usual with a clitoral orgasm. Just make sure to pee before sex and you will be fine, you won't urinate, ride with it as it were. :)There's a big difference between vaginal and clitoral. Do you masturbate OP? As far as I'm concerned it is nigh on impossible to orgasm with a partner unless you know very well how to do it yourself and are able to show them exactly what feels good and what will bring you off so if you don't you should start, it will only enhance any sex you have in future.

kjl

I'm confused, you say you can not orgasm, but what you are describing is a g-spot orgasm, which is harder to achieve then clitoral. Have you not learned how to orgasm with clitoral stimulation? It not hard, just rub it rhythmically and think sexy thoughts.

T "real deal" J

need_advice_x wrote: »

Hi I'm writing this because I have sex with my boyf at leat 7 times a week and I have never been able to orgasm I really love it and it feels great (especially fingering) but I just can't "release" ..

Get him to lick your clit while doing slow fingering motion on your g-spot. it is highly unlikely you won't come. + just relax and push through the sensation like the other people here have said.

LegacyUser

Don't mean to hijack this thread but I am in a similar situation, only my OH can make me orgasm no problem through oral, using his hand and I can do it myself in seconds, but during sex it never happens,we've been together 4 years, the sex is amazing but I would really love to be able to cum. I've had alot of partners over the years and I never came with them either, my OH is the first to make me cum at all, is it just a case I will never be able to cum during sex?

LegacyUser

same_here wrote: »

only my OH can make me orgasm no problem through oral, using his hand and I can do it myself in seconds, but during sex it never happens,we've been together 4 years, the sex is amazing but I would really love to be able to cum.

Recommend buying a silver "bullet" vibrator from Anne Summers or sinilar sex shop, throw a bit of lube on your clit and while you're having penetrative sex either get your patner to hold that to your clit or hold it yourself... guranteed orgasm!

OP- if you're worred about peeing, masturbate on the toilet (i know it sounds silly and revolting) but give it a go after a bath when you're relaxed (and naturally after you've actually emptied your bladder 1st!), you can probably gain assurance this way that you WONT pee during sex!

Good luck!

LegacyUser

always cum wrote: »

Recommend buying a silver "bullet" vibrator from Anne Summers or sinilar sex shop, throw a bit of lube on your clit and while you're having penetrative sex either get your patner to hold that to your clit or hold it yourself... guranteed orgasm!

I will def be gving that a go with the OH thanks!!

Gyalist

need_advice_x wrote: »

Hi I'm writing this because I have sex with my boyf at leat 7 times a week and I have never been able to orgasm I really love it and it feels great (especially fingering) but I just can't "release" .. I feel as though I'm about to pee or something. I just don't know. He cums every time without fail and I think he's given up trying at this stage and it's really upsetting me. Is this normal?

Btw I'm 19 and we've been having sex for the past 2 years. Could it be a case where I may never be able to orgasm?

I was on ro-accutane about 4 years ago if that has anything to do with it

Thanks

There's nothing wrong with you. In fact, you might be actually putting too much pressure on yourself and your boyfriend.

Only 30% of women orgasm through penetration alone.

It's not unusual for women to be in their mid-20s before they have their first orgasm.

You need to train your body and learn to recognise the signs of impending orgasm. Buy a vibrator/dildo and learn how your body responds. It will become easier to achieve after the first few times. When you learn for yourself how to reach orgasm, you have to communicate this to your partner. There's no shame in telling your partner exactly what it takes for you to reach orgasm.

The sensation of needing to pee is usually a sign that your G-Spot is being stimulated. However, because of so many years of toilet training, most women are unable to let themselves go. It could also mean that you are a "squirter" but again many women do not let themselves go because of the feeling of shame associated with bed-wetting.

Certain types of medication - SSRIs used for the treatment of depression are notorious for this - can make reaching orgasm difficult/impossible (Anorgasmia). If you think that this may affect you it is best that you discuss it with your GP.

Miss Fluff

+1 to what Gyalist said.

One point I would differ on is the use of a dildo. Yes, I think it's a great way to explore what works and what doesn't and I'd start with a small one or silver bullet to start with. But, do not become wholly dependent on it either, try and vary masturbation with hands as well or else you may end up ONLY being able to get off with the use of a toy which can be less than convenient to say the least.