I'm way too aggressive in my job.

LegacyUser

OK, heres the situation. I am a college student, 22 years old, working my way through a degree. I work as a nightclub bouncer at weekends to pay my way through college. The problem is, I REALLY REALLY hate the job. I have no alternative though, boy have I tried. But I have a hefty loan to pay off and I need income on a weekly basis. The big problem is that I am becoming increasingly aggressive with people. I just came back from work tonight and I threw 6 people out of the club (all drunk lads taking the piss) and punched two of them as hard as I could on the way out. I know I am out of order doing this but they piss me off so much. The last guy was taking the piss at the end of the night when I asked him to leave.

When i started the job, I was really enjoying it. I was with a different woman every night I was working and really enjoyed the music etc. Now I absolutely hate everything about it, the women included. I can't stand anything to do with the job. I am actually getting angry thinking about it. The other bouncers are typical bouncers and piss me off greatly. I walk around the club like a bull looking for any reason to take my anger out.

I'm worried that I am going to seriously injure someone. I'm worried that one of the managers will see me being overly aggressive and sack me. I already am on my second warning. I just can't help myself when im in the situation. My fuse has gotten smaller and it takes great restraint not to punch people full force in the club. I am actually worried about whether or not I will do that.

I'd like to actually appreciate the fact that I have a job and money coming in, when others are f*cked. I'd like to enjoy working. I'd like to enjoy the perks of the job i.e women, a lot more than I do. Basically I need a completely new attitude.

I know it's a weird problem, but I can seriously see myself hurting someone badly if things keep going the way they are.

DeadMoney

Ok first of all I know exactly how if feels to hate your work, I too have worked in bars and clubs and when you stop enjoying it, the surroundings and the people can really get to you. The is mostly because you are working directly with people who are blowing off steam from their own work and are drunk. The thing is there is a degree of professionalism involved in working in bars or clubs both as bar staff and door staff and this is that you have to be able to take **** of people to a certain extent. Yes you can refuse somebody entry or kick them out but you cannot be getting violent ever.
Ok I know bouncers have to put up with a lot more crap than bar staff and often people challenge them physically but if you cannot restrain yourself, then you really shouldn't be doing this job man. You said yourself that you are unsure if you can contain yourself and you need to be responsible and quit this job asap. I know you need the money and all but it is not fair to stay in a job where you could seriously hurt someone. Whats to say you don't lose your temper and go to town on some drunk guy who wants to fight you for kicking him out. Every idiot out there who thinks he's the man will challenge a bouncer if he gets kicked out, we've all seen it so many times and I am sure you have gotten yourself. You could end up hurting the guy badly and or get hurt yourself. I know of bouncers who have ended up in court and nearly jailed from back home. One bouncer broke a guys arm in many places and came very close to going to prison. He had to pay something like 20k compensation.

Be responsible, quit the job and try find something else. Explain to your parents the situation and ask for some financial assistance until you find a new job. If they cannot help you try some family member who might or a close friend.

magneticimpulse

You have to look for something else. A bookshop, cinema, clothes shop. Something which doesnt involve nightlife as you cannot justify punching people. By right they should be able to call the Gardi, no matter how out of order they are. You are sober, you are working and you have no right to be this aggressive with people. If you find yourself in these situations, is it possible that some other bouncer can deal with the client?

SamuelFox

If its any consolation I did that job myself and I know how you feel. Its a **** job dealing with scum and the people you work with are often absolute knuckle draggers.

Two things I want to say. Firstly, you know yourself that assaulting people is wrong. Theres no excuse - doing it while working is the same as doing it in a chipper or on a bus. Morality aside, don't think that punters won't remember your face. You might be a hard man while sober and backed up by other bouncers, but if one of those lads sees you out on the street some random day you might get a taste of it yourself. From your point of view, if you are heavy handed the other staff won't back you up. I've seen it myself - they won't help you if they percieve that you are endangering them by inflaming a situation. Crowds can turn on you and being on the dancefloor taking punches without back-up is not something I'd ever like to experience.

In terms of why you are doing it, could it be that the hours are getting to you? I find myself (I am in the hospitality/events industry myself) that prolonged late nights make me frazzled and irritable. If you are trying to balance college and work you must be doing some pretty long hours and maybe that is having an effect.

Like the other posters said, its probably time to look at another job.