Pregnancy worries.

LegacyUser

I've got a serious problem and I hope someone can give me some advice. I've got arthritis and i'm on metatrexate, which is an immune suppressant, a form of chemotherapy. My doctor advised me not to have children as this medication can cause major defects during pregnancy and lead to a very badly deformed child. Now my girlfriend is telling me she's pregnant, I took precautions but apparently they didn't work. She wants to have a child at all costs and i've tried to explain to her the problems associated with my medication but she does't want to know. I've asked her to come with me to my doctor to explain my situation but again she doesn't want to know. I'm getting really worried about the situation, i really don't want to have children and i've said this to my girlfriend many times and I think she thinks i'm not being honest with her about my medication. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

LegacyUser

Hi,

Sorry to hear about your illness and this worry on top of it. Your girlfriend absolutely needs to be mentally prepared for what could be a difficult pregnancy and a complete life change. Maybe you'll be lucky, and I truly hope you are. Can you get some written info on your treatment from your doctor or from the internet and leave it where she'll fall over it? She will have to go her GP for regular check-ups throughout the pregnancy so if it's not the same doctor I would ask yours to speak to hers and ensure the message gets across. Sooner rather than later if a termination is something you have in mind - that's a very personal decision and the views of strangers would not be appropriate.

I hope all goes well for you.

Kevster

Hi,

What are the actual chances of the child being deformed? I think you should discuss that further with your doctor first, and maybe ask her to tag along to that. Im sure that imaging tools can detect defects at early stages now too...?

Kevin

magneticimpulse

Hi
I dont know anything about the medication you took, but it seems strange for this medical advice (im not a doctor) for a man!! I work in a chemistry lab and there are known chemicals which can make a man infertile, but ive never heard of him being able to pass this onto a child. I took roacutane and had to go on the pill and sign a legal form to say that I would not get pregnant while taking the medication. By law you can sue a pharmaceutical company over things like this and this is why they normally put in precautious like this. It seems if it was that serious, why did they not "make" your girlfriend sign documents and take the pill!!!???

Kevster

Maybe the medication he's taking causes mutated sperm cells?

January

magneticimpulse wrote: »

Hi
I dont know anything about the medication you took, but it seems strange for this medical advice (im not a doctor) for a man!! I work in a chemistry lab and there are known chemicals which can make a man infertile, but ive never heard of him being able to pass this onto a child. I took roacutane and had to go on the pill and sign a legal form to say that I would not get pregnant while taking the medication. By law you can sue a pharmaceutical company over things like this and this is why they normally put in precautious like this. It seems if it was that serious, why did they not "make" your girlfriend sign documents and take the pill!!!???

How can you make someone sign a document stating they will not get pregnant? Sometimes it's not a choice. I've read up on wikipedia about the medication you're taking OP and I think you need to take your girlfriend along to your GP/a GP quickly and get them to explain the risks of pregnancy in your circumstances. It doesn't explain on wikipedia the exact details of what can happen in pregnancy. Maybe she just doesn't understand the implications yet.

LegacyUser

magneticimpulse wrote: »

Hi
I dont know anything about the medication you took, but it seems strange for this medical advice (im not a doctor) for a man!! I work in a chemistry lab and there are known chemicals which can make a man infertile, but ive never heard of him being able to pass this onto a child. I took roacutane and had to go on the pill and sign a legal form to say that I would not get pregnant while taking the medication. By law you can sue a pharmaceutical company over things like this and this is why they normally put in precautious like this. It seems if it was that serious, why did they not "make" your girlfriend sign documents and take the pill!!!???

This is not as strange as you think i'm on the pill and starting on medication in January and have been told not to get pregnant as it can do serious damage to the foetus.

LegacyUser

Hi Op

My daugher is also on this medication and having turned 17 was advised to go on the pill as she is in a long term relationship with her boyfriend now.

She was diagnosed with Rheumathoid Arthritis at age 12 and has been taking Metotrexate since.

Her Rheumathologist has stressed to her that she must NOT get pregnant whilst on this medication and if and when the time comes she does want to have a family she MUST be off this tablet for at least six months prior to falling pregnant.

I wasnt aware it was the same for a man taking it but then again I have had no reason to ask.

I would seriously suggest you take your girlfriend with you and visit your Rheumathologist and let him spell it out to her because I know myself from what my daughters said, a baby conceived taking this can be very very seriously deformed and mentally disabled.

kittenkiller

Hi OP.

You need to sit your girlfriend down and have an adult conversation about the creation of life and the responsibility it holds.

She seems to have a remarkably immature attitude about becoming a mother!
I can't believe she's refusing to even talk to a doctor about the effects of your medication on her child!!
I don't know a single other woman who would put their child at risk in such a manner!
How much out of her way does she need to go that she'd bury her head in the sand about such a serious issue?!

Maybe some online research printed out will help support your argument and at least convince her to consult a professional.

Best of luck OP.