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Things to Say When Caught Sleeping at Your Desk

  • 24-11-2009 10:30pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,356 ✭✭✭


    10. "They told me at the Blood Bank this might happen."

    9. "This is just a 15 minute power nap they raved about in the time
    management course you sent me to!"

    8. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the Whiteout. You probably got here
    just in time."

    7. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and
    envisioning a new business strategy."

    6. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."

    5. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related
    stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice Yoga?"

    4. "Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out how to
    handle that big accounting problem."

    3. "Did you ever notice sound coming out of these keyboards when you put
    your ear down real close?"

    2. "Who put decaf in the wrong pot?!?"

    AND THE NUMBER ONE best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your
    desk........

    1. Raise your head slowly and say, "...in Jesus' name, Amen."


    A professor was giving a lecture on "Involuntary Muscular Contractions" to first year medical students.

    Realizing that this was not the most riveting subject, the professor decided to lighten the mood slightly.

    He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, "Do you know what you're a-hole is doing while you're having an orgasm?"

    She replied, "I never thought about it before, but he's probably drinking beer at the bar with his friends."


    My husband, being unhappy with my mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods.

    We've discovered that when I'm in a good mood, it turns green.

    When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead.

    Maybe next time he'll buy me a diamond.


    A lady opened her refrigerator and saw a rabbit sitting on one of the shelves.

    "What are you doing in there?" she asked.

    The rabbit replied: "This is a Westinghouse, isn't it?"

    To which the lady replied, "Yes."

    "Well," the rabbit said, "I'm westing." :o


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