GF in UK

LegacyUser

Hi I have been seeing my girlfriend for the past few months and she has moved to the UK. I am wondering how do I keep her interested in me while she is there?. I see here quite often as we are over and back, but I fear she will get bored of me being too nice by the same old texts and calls without me being there....I prefer to talk to her face to face as anything else are just words in my opinion. We are in our early 30s by the way.

Zaph

Skype is your friend. My girlfriend and I use it all the time, and while it's no substitute for actually being with each other in person, it's a definite step-up fromcalls and texts when you can actually see the other person. Oh, and it's free too.

Zaph

samsung22 Banned for a month

Contact between the UK and Ireland (?) is not an issue:

- Easy travel back and forth
- Time spent together is good quality (many couples who live together see little of each other apart from weekends)
- Phone & texts
- Skype (as Zaph mentioned)
- E-mail & other electronic messages
- Phone sex
- Date nights
- Cards & letters
- Meeting up in a third different location
- etc.

Your issue is that you "fear she will get bored of [you] being too nice by the same old texts and calls without [you] being there". This is understandable at the early stages of any relationship, but particularly in one which switches to long-distance-relationship at such an early point.

Don't let your insecurity get in the way of this. If you want it to work, make it work as many couples have done and continue to do.

And have a little faith in your girlfriend!

BraziliaNZ

try not to let it get you down, try and stay upbeat when you're talking to her etc, she doesn't want a mopey get on the other side of the phone all the time. It's easy to get there and back. Remember the ferries too, I used to drive/motorbike over and you're there in a few hours and it's cheap.

Madame Razz

If you are both committed to it then it's easy peasy as outlined by the various posts above. No time difference either, which helps enormously. My OH has been working abroad for the past year. We get to see one another once a month, but it takes him 14hours travel and 3 flights to actually get back here and when he's away we have a 5 hour time difference. UK is a cakewalk by comparison. These things are simple if you put your mind to them, all it takes is a little bit more resolve on both your parts. If what ye have is worth it you'll make the effort. Good byes are the worst, but you really learn to make the most of your time together.

Best of luck with it!

Madame Razz

Madame Razz wrote: »

If you are both committed to it then it's easy peasy as outlined by the various posts above. No time difference either, which helps enormously. My OH has been working abroad for the past year. We get to see one another once a month, but it takes him 14hours travel and 3 flights to actually get back here and when he's away we have a 5 hour time difference. UK is a cakewalk by comparison. These things are simple if you put your mind to them, all it takes is a little bit more resolve on both your parts. If what ye have is worth it you'll make the effort. Good byes are the worst, but you really learn to make the most of your time together.

Best of luck with it!

Yep, it took me 2 days to get over to my OH and there's a 9 hour time difference. I know it's not a competition, but the UK really isn't far away at all. It just seems that way cos there's no land or rail connection, but the flight isn't even an hour to most places and flights are normally very cheap. Yes it is a bit of an effort to get to the airport and so on but it's for you and your girlfriend to decide whether that hassle is worth it.

LegacyUser

eya i am in the same situation, oh in London me in ireland. It isnt as easy peasy to tell the truth, we are approaching two years and the first year wasnt too bad but it is getting real old real fast. here is what i have found/in my experience makes things easier:

#meals out and clubs and shows are loads of fun. plan exciting nights when you can (england is so much cheaper so it isnt too bad expense wise)
#although it is fun to be out and about and makes things exciting you have to have weekends where it is just you and your misus
#personally i could do with a few more texts from my oh, i like going to bed witha sweet goodnight text! (he doesnt send goodnight texts at all, only very rarely. could do with an extra few! )
#show her you care when you see her/come over, cook her her favourite dinner, with favourite bottle of wine and fire
#talk every day
#talk about the financial implications. things can get financially difficult
#you will have to compromise a lot, if you aren't from the same town, sometimes she is going to have to return to her family for visits instead of visiting you and having some "alone" time
#every six months maybe one weekend just you and her reconnecting, when talking on the phone we might talk 6-8 minutes a day, but when we are together it is a natural flow of conversation all day. You miss that intimacy and things can feel stilted, but you need to spend time alone to remember how you get on and remind each other why ye love each other
#think about what is going to be happening in the future (my oh is coming back but I was considering moving over) you have to contemplate someon having leeway. Long distance gets annoying and frustrating and it is great when you are together but after when you leave on the plane and are home missing them it gets lonely and upsetting
#if you are annoyed pissed off whatever you have to talk about it, problems can get bigger when you aren't around, itis better to wait until you are face to face but talk about any problems in a safe and controlled manner
#you might get paranoid being so far away but you have to put that aside
#be sweet and loving without closeted and suffocating, attentive but not overbearing, considerate and able to compromise, interested, if she mentions male mates dont get jealous, love her and let her know that,

Some people handle long distance better than others, it will affect you differently than other people so everything you feel/get annoyed about is natural for you. Best of luck!