Lone hot looking girl in a pub

LegacyUser

Hi boys & girls,

I am looking for your honest opinion about the following story. I will not disclose my personal opinion, because I am looking for unbiased replies. This seems like the most appropriate forum to post this question, but do let me know if you think it's not.

It's a dull Sunday night. I'm an average looking guy and I head out alone for a pint or two to a popular pub & club in central Dublin. It's around 7.45 when I arrive. The pub is quiet and half empty. I sit down opposite a little stage and order a pint.

A little later a band starts performing on stage and the bar starts filling up. I enjoy the music and my pint. Suddenly this gorgeous looking woman (and I mean *REALLY* hot) comes into the bar. She looks exotic, South American I would say. Very short (almost non-existant) mini skrit, her hair pulled back and bound. She sits next to me, at a safe distance.

I continue to enjoy the music and my pint while she also orders a pint. A little while later a bunch of guys come in and crowd around the bar next to her. She moves closer towards me. Her legs are crossed and pointed at me. Her pint is on the bar behind my back, so in order to reach it she has to move her hand behind my back every single time. I continue to enjoy my the music and my pint.

She seems to enjoy the music and swings her left foot up and down to the rhythm of the music, she's touching my foot every time she swings in my direction. She's looking at her phone, reading texts. 15 minutes later she heads for the loos. When she comes back she again sits next to me.

Now I have to go to the loo. When I come back she's gone. I notice she's standing next to the exit, looking at her phone. No eye contact. 5 minutes later she's gone.

Guys and girls (especially girls), what's your honest opinion of this situation?

minidazzler

Two of the options I can see.

1/ She was in there waiting for someone just killing time before hand. (hence checking the messages.)

2/ She wanted you to chat her up.

There are literally hundreds of ways of looking at this, it depends on being there how we would read the situation I think/

Red Hand

Just a hot girl sitting next to me would be my interpretation if in that situation. No eye contact, so maybe she wasn't that aware of you?

opinion guy

lgiap wrote: »

Guys and girls (especially girls), what's your honest opinion of this situation?

Purple.

No honestly my opinion is purple.

My point is you can interpret this to mean ANYTHING when in fact it's inherently meaningless.

scarymoon1

I think she was waiting for someone by her texting on her phone. You could have just said hello or something though! Be friendly

e04bf099

I wouldn't have been able to say hello most likely. Thats not unfriendly. Some people are just easilly intimidated because they feel like everything would be the wrong thing and the easiest thing is just to do nothing.

It is easy to say you should've said hello. I'm sure she would've been friendly. If not, it would've been her issue, not yours. But still, I would've struggled to say anything.

scarymoon1

e04bf099 wrote: »

I wouldn't have been able to say hello most likely. Thats not unfriendly. Some people are just easilly intimidated because they feel like everything would be the wrong thing and the easiest thing is just to do nothing.

It is easy to say you should've said hello. I'm sure she would've been friendly. If not, it would've been her issue, not yours. But still, I would've struggled to say anything.

Ok this is boards - i need to be precise about what i say! I just meant he saw a hot girl in a bar - he thought she was into him by how she moved her leg! Now she is gone and he'll never know. I guess by friendly i mean - just be open to conversation or whatever and have no regrets. If you like someone - TRY to say hello at least. Didn't mean to offend anyone by my comment!

e04bf099

I wasn't offended, sorry, I should be more precise. I worry about coming across as rude a lot in these situations, which is why I said that. It just happens very often, and I get frustarted with myself. She probably wasn't looking to be chatted up, in fairness, but it would've been a natural thing for him to do.

scarymoon1

e04bf099 wrote: »

I wasn't offended, sorry, I should be more precise. I worry about coming across as rude a lot in these situations, which is why I said that. It just happens very often, and I get frustarted with myself. She probably wasn't looking to be chatted up, in fairness, but it would've been a natural thing for him to do.

No not chat her up - just chat. Unless he wanted to chat her up if im making sense haha.

e04bf099

Yeah, chatting, you're right.

krudler

Hooker?

Liam Byrne

Can a girl not go into a pub alone without being second-guessed ?

Or is the girl in question posting frustratedly elsewhere on boards about an average-looking yet hot guy that she shook her leg at but he didn't make a move ?

LegacyUser

krudler wrote: »

Hooker?

OP here. I'd say: bingo. That's the reason why I didn't make a move. Let me elaborate.

A couple of months ago I was out with some friends in that some pub & club. We were dancing downstairs in the club when this girl started to attract attention. She had a guy with her that at first glance looked like her boyfriend, but she was trying really hard to get guys to notice her.

She wasn't really my cup of tea, but my friend was really into her and chatted her up. After a short chat her reply was "Sure, no problem, 250€ and I'll do whatever you want". Later that night my friend told me the story and I remembered a well known Irish escorting web site. I browsed through the pictures and lo and behold, there she was, advertising her services.

So the first thing that crossed my mind when that hot woman was trying to get my attention this Sunday was: she's a prostitute, you'll just get yourself embarrassed. And I froze up

peekyboo

krudler wrote: »

Hooker?

I was thinking this as well tbh. What girl goes in and starts physical contact with a stranger but a tiny, almost non-existant, skirt on?

finbarrk

krudler wrote: »

Hooker?

Most likely.

Eve_Dublin

peekyboo wrote: »

I was thinking this as well tbh. What girl goes in and starts physical contact with a stranger but a tiny, almost non-existant, skirt on?

Holy God...I´m not really reading this, am I?

If this girl was Latin-American, then they´d be a little more revealing in their choice of clothes and a little more outwardly flirtatous than us Irish women GENERALLY (I´ve been there). The fact that some men in here presume she was a hooker because she wears revealing clothing and brushes her foot against the OPs (big deal?) hardly makes her a likely candidate as a prostitute? If she was gyrating againist him and brushing her breasts against him every opportunity she could get, then you might be suspicious...or you might just presume she fancied the OP. As Liam Byrne said, can this girl not have a drink at a bar without being presumed as either a)waiting to be chatted up or b) A FECKING PROSTITUTE!!! I´m guessing she was having a drink at a bar, enjoying the music, was oblivious to the OP hence the banging him with her foot, reaching over him to get her drink and lack of eye contact.

This is pretty shocking stuff....some people in here with very old-fashioned views.

CDfm

e04bf099 wrote: »

I wasn't offended, sorry, I should be more precise. I worry about coming across as rude a lot in these situations, which is why I said that. It just happens very often, and I get frustarted with myself. She probably wasn't looking to be chatted up, in fairness, but it would've been a natural thing for him to do.

Most people don't like to be thought of as pushy or players.

So the decision is whether to enjoy your pint or engage but respecting a persons personal space and privacy.

An easy one liner would be - are you waiting for someone or would you mind my pint/seat while I go to the bathroom. Or its a nice band etc. Simple and chatty.

My opinion for what its worth.And it would seem she was comfortable around the OP and may have been thinking the same thing.

Blackpitts

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Holy God...I´m not really reading this, am I?

If this girl was Latin-American, then they´d be a little more revealing in their choice of clothes and a little more outwardly flirtatous than us Irish women GENERALLY (I´ve been there). The fact that some men in here presume she was a hooker because she wears revealing clothing and brushes her foot against the OPs (big deal?) hardly makes her a likely candidate as a prostitute? If she was gyrating againist him and brushing her breasts against him every opportunity she could get, then you might be suspicious...or you might just presume she fancied the OP. As Liam Byrne said, can this girl not have a drink at a bar without being presumed as either a)waiting to be chatted up or b) A FECKING PROSTITUTE!!! I´m guessing she was having a drink at a bar, enjoying the music, was oblivious to the OP hence the banging him with her foot, reaching over him to get her drink and lack of eye contact.

This is pretty shocking stuff....some people in here with very old-fashioned views.

+1

this thread shows how sexually frustrated are some irish people.

OP, you should have made a move, a friendly approach, something like "hey, are you enjoying the music?"...if you get chatted up, this is the best way to understand if someone is into you. there are no secrets, no "password" to unlock or else, this kind of "stupid" questions are just for breaking the ice.
If you get a cold look, then you move on and you keep enjoying your pint (as you did at end).
Next time try to be more confident but not sleezy, it's better than writing a thread on internet asking unknow people to sort all your doubts out.

To all others suggestijg she was a prostitute, are you for real?
I reckon someone of you will start a new thread one of these days entitled "why i'm 30 yo and I have no gf?"

LegacyUser

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Holy God...I´m not really reading this, am I?

If this girl was Latin-American, then they´d be a little more revealing in their choice of clothes and a little more outwardly flirtatous than us Irish women GENERALLY (I´ve been there). The fact that some men in here presume she was a hooker because she wears revealing clothing and brushes her foot against the OPs (big deal?) hardly makes her a likely candidate as a prostitute? If she was gyrating againist him and brushing her breasts against him every opportunity she could get, then you might be suspicious...or you might just presume she fancied the OP. As Liam Byrne said, can this girl not have a drink at a bar without being presumed as either a)waiting to be chatted up or b) A FECKING PROSTITUTE!!! I´m guessing she was having a drink at a bar, enjoying the music, was oblivious to the OP hence the banging him with her foot, reaching over him to get her drink and lack of eye contact.

This is pretty shocking stuff....some people in here with very old-fashioned views.

OP my flatmate told me pretty much the same story - he was out alone in a quiet enough bar - the only difference being that a bloke came into talk to the girl for a few minutes then left. She was a prostitute... the barman said that he's seen her once or twice - always on quiet nights too.

CDfm

Monafternoon wrote: »

OP my flatmate told me pretty much the same story - he was out alone in a quiet enough bar - the only difference being that a bloke came into talk to the girl for a few minutes then left. She was a prostitute... the barman said that he's seen her once or twice - always on quiet nights too.

Lets not stereotype all Latina's -she could have been a nun on a career break.There are lots of normal south americans and she was probably one.

Victor

krudler wrote: »

Hooker?

I think you are reading a bit too much into it.

By that estimation men who drink alone in pubs must be Joes / severe alcoholics / loners.*


* Any of these may be true, but they aren't definitely true.

Eve_Dublin

Monafternoon wrote: »

OP my flatmate told me pretty much the same story - he was out alone in a quiet enough bar - the only difference being that a bloke came into talk to the girl for a few minutes then left. She was a prostitute... the barman said that he's seen her once or twice - always on quiet nights too.

What has this story got to do with OP´s??????? Because your flatemate met a prostitute in a bar, that automatically means ANY girl that has a drink in a bar by herself is a PROSTITUTE??? How does your story relate to the OP´s FFS?

The OP would not question this woman´s "motives" (having a drink at a bar, I´m guessing) if she was a) male and b) Irish, so what does that make people who question if she´s a prostitute or not, do you think? I´m sure you can put 2 and 2 together yourselves. Think about it. These types of comments are an embarassment to the Irish population. I´m cringing beyond belief here...

And even so, what the hell is the issue here anyway?

opinion guy

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

And even so, what the hell is the issue here anyway?

I'm kinda wondering that too. Still I'll stick with my initial analysis - purple

So the first thing that crossed my mind when that hot woman was trying to get my attention this Sunday was

I'll bet she didn't even notice you were there

CDfm

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Because your flatemate met a prostitute in a bar,

I know its off topic but it says more about the flatmate and the type of places he goes to.

The OP would not question this woman´s "motives" (having a drink at a bar, I´m guessing)

I'm guessing she was thirsty.

e04bf099

Eve, you are over-reacting. The lad said he had an experience where a girl at a club was chatted up by his friend and turned out to be a hooker. So next time he was in a pub and a girl in a "non-existent skirt" came in and started brushing his leg... Maybe it isn't appropriate to assume so, but he didn't exactly accuse her of it, the thought just made him nervous. How does that make you cringe? I've been propositioned by working women in Dublin before. Lots of lads have. So it happens a lot and in that situation it was possible that it was a hooker. Hookers don't tend to proposition women so maybe you don't recognise how common it is. And as for being ashamed of the Irish, that is just meaningless. It happens in every city in the western world exactly the same. Prague is the worst. "YOU WANT MIDGETS? WE GOT MIDGETS!":D

As for a womans freedom to dress provokatively and go for drinks alone without being accused of being hookers, well, go right ahead. Just remember that there plenty of hookers around Dublin that do the same. Lads will not accuse you. But we will find it hard to tell the difference sometimes and the possiblility will make most of us feel awkward.

TBH, if a girl dressed like that and was just out for a drink alone, I'd have ignore her anyway, whether she was a hooker or not. I don't find slutty attractive. It is just desperate and attention seeking as far as I'm concerned.

e04bf099

CDfm wrote: »

I know its off topic but it says more about the flatmate and the type of places he goes to.

[I.e. any club in Dublin where lads go to pick up women. I know, I hate those places:rolleyes:.]

I'm guessing she was thirsty.

It is possible she was a hooker. It is also possible that she was thirsty, but the former is what made him nervous, not the latter.

CDfm

e04bf099 wrote: »

It is possible she was a hooker. It is also possible that she was thirsty, but the former is what made him nervous, not the latter.

Well we are all broadminded and maybe the OP should have spoken to her. I think he should have for one.

Statistically - the possibility that she was a working girl is very small. Tiny.

In the words of the prophet - a nice evening and potential girlfriend - dodged

Try not to be so shy in future OP.

Bet you are kicking yourself now OP.

Blackpitts

e04bf099 wrote: »

As for a womans freedom to dress provokatively and go for drinks alone without being accused of being hookers, well, go right ahead. Just remember that there plenty of hookers around Dublin that do the same. Lads will not accuse you. But we will find it hard to tell the difference sometimes and the possiblility will make most of us feel awkward.

lol, I reckon 90% of the girls I see in pubs and clubs during the weekend would look like prostitutes into your eyes.
In my opinion most of the times this is just an excuse that some men create to avoid the real issue: they are to shy and unsecure to make a move.

e04bf099 wrote: »

TBH, if a girl dressed like that and was just out for a drink alone, I'd have ignore her anyway, whether she was a hooker or not. I don't find slutty attractive. It is just desperate and attention seeking as far as I'm concerned.

fair play to you, you don't like slutty look and I respect your opinion, but I don't understand why the thought of being approached by a prostitute would make a guy nervous.
Even if she was a prostitute, I'm sure there was nothing to be nervous about, I've been approached by them when I was travelling in Budapest, Riga and Las Vegas and when I said "no thanks", they just went away with no issues at all.

LegacyUser

She'd be a pretty penniless prostitute if she just sat around half-empty bars waiting for Irish men to approach her.

e04bf099

Blackpitts wrote: »

lol, I reckon 90% of the girls I see in pubs and clubs during the weekend would look like prostitutes into your eyes.
In my opinion most of the times this is just an excuse that some men create to avoid the real issue: they are to shy and unsecure to make a move.

I don't think 99% of women are prostitutes, but I don't chat to women that wear close that intimate the phrase "easy access". Even if they are actually smart girls and have lots going for them, there are enough dumb-asses that it isn't worth the effort. Nice dress sends a signal that they have more going for them than their "assets". Thats not the issue though. Most of the women you're talking about go out with their mates and are obviously not hookers. But this girl was alone, and d'other girl was with a lad(obviously not her gay best friend) but was obviously looking for attention. In those scenarios, it is more likely, even if it is still less than 50-50, that she is a hooker.

fair play to you, you don't like slutty look and I respect your opinion, but I don't understand why the thought of being approached by a prostitute would make a guy nervous.
Even if she was a prostitute, I'm sure there was nothing to be nervous about, I've been approached by them when I was travelling in Budapest, Riga and Las Vegas and when I said "no thanks", they just went away with no issues at all.

In fairness, prostitutes don't make me nervous. They're pretty funny usually. It is the indecision of not knowing that made the OP nervous. That would annoy me also.

You're partly right though. I am insecure about how to act in those situation, but I also just don't like hookers. Its simple.

Eve_Dublin

e04bf099 wrote: »

It is possible she was a hooker. It is also possible that she was thirsty, but the former is what made him nervous, not the latter.

Who said anything made him nervous? Would this kind of "behaviour" make you nervous? If so, you really need to get out more.

Reread his post. I don´t even know what his issue is here. If you think I´m over-reacting, then we´ll beg to differ. This woman gave no reason for anyone in here to assume she was a prostitute and people have let their own bigoted view cloud their judgement, which is simply not cool in this day and age. It´s that simple. Reread the Original Post. As a previous poster said, "She'd be a pretty penniless prostitute if she just sat around half-empty bars waiting for Irish men to approach her". This woman did NOTHING to deserve that label.

e04bf099

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Who said anything made him nervous? Would this kind of "behaviour" make you nervous? If so, you really need to get out more.

Reread his post. I don´t even know what his issue is here. If you think I´m over-reacting, then we´ll beg to differ. This woman gave no reason for anyone in here to assume she was a prostitute and people have let their own bigoted view cloud their judgement, which is simply not cool in this day and age. It´s that simple. Reread the Original Post. As a previous poster said, "She'd be a pretty penniless prostitute if she just sat around half-empty bars waiting for Irish men to approach her". This woman did NOTHING to deserve that label.

Reread my post. He didn't use the word "nervous" but the fact that he would have been embarrassed had he chatted her up to find out she was a hooker basically equates to him being nervous.

She wasn't accused or labelled a hooker. He didn't stand up and shout it around the bar. It just occurred to him and made him embarrassed. As I said, it happens. Neither him, nor me, is a bigot. But the fact that it is hard enough for some people to pluck up the courage to chat up women + the prospect of her being a hooker, and it is prefectly normal to be embarrassed by this, added up to him taking the easy way out by not chatting to her.

Btw, Eve, are you saying it was definitely NOT a hooker? If so, that is naive.

Blackpitts

e04bf099 wrote: »

Btw, Eve, are you saying it was definitely NOT a hooker? If so, that is naive.

and maybe that guy over there is a perv, how do you know he isn't? or maybe that girl there is crazy, i don't know her or her family so it can be!

I think that's simply paranoid! would you wonder the same if she was irish and pale?
if I see a hot south american girl alone in a bar I would first thank god for giving me this present and then I would think she is new in town and she hasn't many friends yet. There are chances she could reject me, but if not....i'd be the happiest man in town.
no wonder why it's so difficult to make friends in Dublin!

e04bf099

Those are bad examples for two reasons.

1) because they have no context
2) people don't care. They don't worry about whether people are pervy or crazy unless those aspects of a person infringe on their intentions and projects.

But if you were a teacher or a parent at a playground and some man was loitering around by himself then you'd be concerned that he might be a threat. I don't mind talking to a "crazy" person. I'll assume their just a person at first and if they do something that makes me particularly uncomfortable I'll start to drift away, like most people.

Now, this girl could have been a hooker. Nobody would accuse her of it though until she began hooking. So there was no bigotry involved here.

If you wear a clown suit be prepared to be suspected of clowning.

Blackpitts

e04bf099 wrote: »

If you wear a clown suit be prepared to be suspected of clowning.

as you have just said, it depends on the context.
If i wear a clown suit for halloween nobody will suspect that I'm an actual clown.
That girl was wearing what 90% of girls wear on a normal weekend night in the city centre and you calling us naive because we don't suspect she is a hooker.

Eve_Dublin

e04bf099 wrote: »

Reread my post. He didn't use the word "nervous" but the fact that he would have been embarrassed had he chatted her up to find out she was a hooker basically equates to him being nervous.

She wasn't accused or labelled a hooker. He didn't stand up and shout it around the bar. It just occurred to him and made him embarrassed. As I said, it happens. Neither him, nor me, is a bigot. But the fact that it is hard enough for some people to pluck up the courage to chat up women + the prospect of her being a hooker, and it is prefectly normal to be embarrassed by this, added up to him taking the easy way out by not chatting to her.

Btw, Eve, are you saying it was definitely NOT a hooker? If so, that is naive.

It´s really irrelevant to me whether you agree with me or not. This is how I feel. I´ve gone into many a pub in Dublin for a drink and or to watch a gig alone with no ulterior motive, something I never felt I could do in other countries I´ve lived in because I believe the Irish have a slightly more progressive attitude than of men in other countries I´ve been to. I find some of the attitudes in here disappointing. It´s a step back instead of a step forward.


I´m not at all niave. I´ve been around the block, travelled in and lived in enough countries (including Latin-American countries),met enough people to have a slightly more open-minded view of people then this. I´d be more willing to give people the benefit of the doubt.

No, I´m not saying anything is definite...how could any of us know what the hell she does based on what the OP wrote and this is my point...I´m reacting to those who said she WAS when I can´t see any evidence that this is the case. They would not have drawn these conclusions if she was Irish (the OP is not even sure where she was from). That really wasn´t the first thing that popped into my mind. If he was embarassed by her very, very harmless actions without actually knowing who, where or what she does, then he´s obviously led a very sheltered life and I´m very sorry for his troubles. My solution? Get out more and open your mind.

Someone banging her foot off his or reaching for a drink over him in a bar is not the actions of a prostitute or at least an on-duty prostitute. If the woman WAS from a Latin-American country (yet another guess by the OP), then they would be more comfortable showing flesh than us Irish ladies. It would be the norm in most Latin-American countries to wear skimpy clothes. I´ve seen it first hand. Even a lot of the Latin-Americans AND the Spanish here in Madrid dress in a very revealing way during the Summer because they´d be more comfortable showing their flesh than we would and have a less conservative attitude to sex than us. I for one would love that kind of bravery and comfort with how I look...but I´m not sure some Irish men are ready for that yet, evidently. Conservative Ireland is far from dead and gone, it seems.

JohnThomas09

why didnt you jsut chat to her.rather than sit there like a zoombie.

Victor

I'm not seeing the same issue as the OP here. Thread closed.