Paying ex €90 a week no proof

LegacyUser

Hi Guys,

looking for some advice on how best to approach my ex with regard to signing something to say that I give her €90 per week towards my 4year olds up keep. For the last two years I have been paying cash... big mistake!!! At one stage she was lying to the social saying that I was giving her €40 pw and they came after me for an extra €30 pw.... this has since been sorted but I am worried this could happen again. I want her to sign something that will cover me for the last two years (over €9,000 in payments not including extras!) and also any future payments I make. Any Ideas on how to word it????

Also i don't mind paying for my daughter (far from it) but i do have her 3days pw. Should I have to pay €90 pw it seems a lot since I only earn €400 pw and a house to pay for.


Cheers

DamagedTrax

ask her for a signed receipt every week. if she refuses then suggest mediation with an external 3rd party. if she still refuses then tell her you will be going to the family courts to apply for a maintainance order.

the family courts will look at both of your incomes and expenditure and decide on a fair amount that allows both of you to be as comfortable as possible.

if they decide on a figure that you feel is a little low (after all it is your daughter) then you can offer more,

i would advise the court route. i was originally in your situation until it ended up in court due to neither side being able to agree on a figure. and while it was initially messy for a few court visits its now sorted and i have piece of mind about it.

if you do end up going to the courts remember to keep up your payments in the meantime. it will stand better to you in the courtroom because as impartial as the judges are meant to be.. they really arent.

the family law courts are free aswell and you can also represent yourself as it's mediation with legal binding rather than trial.

good luck

Oh The Humanity

Pay her by cheque. Always leave a paper trail !

metrovelvet

Shes probably worried that if she has anything down in writing she could be caught for welfare fraud.

If there were some way you could guarantee her that you wont report her or that she could get caught then she would probably document it for you.

If not then take it to court and that way you will have it in writing.

SassyGirl_1

If she's got a bank account, why not set up a standing order to automatically transfer the money in to her account from now on?

Keep the bank statements as proof.

Overheal

Cheques with the Memo underneath. Further to that you can use Registered Mail, but thats a bit costly for 90e a week. Its usually I only ever see on eviction notices and the like.

If youve been making the withdrawals in 90 euro or even 100 euro denominations you can argue that. If she is claiming 40e a week, there would be more 40e withdrawals than 90+ withdrawals on the account. Thats inconclusive, but helpful. Check your records. Always file statements away somewhere.

For my car payments (im getting personal financing through a family member) we've done a standing order in which the bank cuts a paper check at the end of every month. Its paper trail+++

seamus

Cheque with a memo or a standing order and then carefully file away your bank statements.

If she doesn't have a bank account, then go with cheques and carefully make a note on the memo of what it's for. And file away those bank statements.

Although the court route will formalise any payments, if she turns around and says that you haven't been giving her anything, the court might take her side on it.

helimachoptor

Standing order is the way to go here buddy.