spending problem - usually when down

nesbitt

I have been going through a long drawn out messy break up with someone who was v special to me. Still have not had proper closure so finding things difficult.

At the weekend went on retail therapy stupid fix. I maxed out my CC and it had been cleared to zero up to then. I am not flush financially so could not have done this at a worse time really.

I took tags off goods so cannot bring them back for refund. I will have to sit down over the next few days and work out a cash flow spreadsheet to spring 2010 to clear this madness..


Anyone else done this and overcome it. Thanks

dudara

I was going to say that you should take stuff back and get refunds.

Your next option is to sell the stuff - Try Adverts.ie, DoneDeal.ie or sell them on eBay. Recoup some of the money and use it to pay off the balance.

Ultimately, you are going to have to learn to recognise the triggers for a spending spree and do something else.

dublingal80

an ex of mine "borrowed" a small fortune from me. At the time I was on about 19k a year, renting for 400, had to pay bills, give him money and manage day to day. Giving him money had my credit card maxed out. It was a horrible situation I put myself into, but I just took it one step at a time and concentrated on paying off the credit card, as much as i could each month, and anything that was left over at the end of the month went off it too

Just be sensible with your money. Buy yourself the bare minimum for your weekly shopping. Shop around in lidl, aldi, and meat factories and get yourself some bargains.
When doing dinner, make a huge batch of it so you can bring it with you for lunch the next day, or its dinner for the following night.
Nights out arent too bad. Have a few drinks with friends before you head out drinkin (wearing all your fancy new clothes ) and only bring 60 quid with you for the night, including taxi fare.

Im saving for a holiday in the summer and its gotten to the stage where I really dont want to spend money. If i see something on sale, even in pennys, for a euro, that was 13 euros, i would stand there and ask myself, do i really need it? answer is usually no and i just leave it

Just be strict with yourself over the next few months, which i know will be hard with xmas and new years coming up.

Many switch your credit card to a 0% interest for 6 months one, and it just means your money will be actually paying off the credit card, not just the interest.

Best of luck!:D

nesbitt

Good advice.

I will indeed watch out for triggers that sets off this behaviour in me.

I do realise that I should not have gone for spending spree on Sat, really wish I had just gone for a walk on the beach instead. I had good nite out with my friends Sat nite so not as if I'm at a loose end. Some of it was wanting an image change due to my ex (or soon to be ex!) making comments about me being a bit of a skinny jeans and top person and how good I would look in a dress and great shoes etc. This is shallow I know but it kinda cut me up a bit as my image is due to not much of a budget for new clothes. So that was the trigger this time around.

So now I have great new wardrobe that I will be paying for over the next 5/6 months at least. Mind you I wont have much of a budget to spend on actually going out!!

I go through months of being sensible and grand and then have a blow out of this type and it is just kinda crappy situation to be in.

I spoke to a friend yesterday and she said I should try doing some DIY, Cleaning, Clear Out or some such when I'm like this.

So wish I did not go on this spree, could have had a foreign holiday with what I spent. Jaysus I should know better.

dublingal80

ah dont beat yourself up over it! we all do stupid things we regret

When you get your Credit Card bill, stick it on your wall in your room, so you can see every single thing you bought and you can see how you maxed out the Card, and it might help, next time when you think you want to do something like that, seeing the situation it left you in the last time.

Deffo get your ipod next time and just go walking or running to get your frustration out. I think blaring music and cleaning cleanses the soul

pickarooney

How does this work exactly? Are you conscious while you're shopping that you're in the process of ruining yourself financially or do you go into some sort of trance until you get home and realise you've spent thousands of euros you don't have? This is a genuine question as I don't see how giving advice on scrimping and saving is going to help if you're just going to go out and spend a few more grand the next day.

dirtydress

This happens to me too...more often than i care to say unfortunately. I dont go on huge binges but I definitely spend way more than i can afford. I actually cancelled my credit card recently because now if i overspend then I just have to do without other things like lunch out or credit at the end of the month. If you're someone who does this as a way to feel better (like I do) then I would highly recommend cancelling your credit card.

Alternatively I would try bringing back the clothes, you never know they might accept them? Or start doing what I do and leave the tags on until you actually wear the item so you know you're definitely happy with it, it will also make you realise when you have items you havent even worn in your closet that you're spending a bit too much.

Dont beat yourself up, these things happen and you will pay it off gradually...even if you get a loan to cover it then you wont be paying huge interests and can spread out the repayments. Its not the end of the world!

Novella

I maxxed out my credit card too and then I just got rid of it, paid back the grand or so in one go when I got paid one month and then had to live for those four weeks on pretty much next to nothing! It taught me a lesson though, not to spend what I don't have! I also cancelled my overdraft last month so now I just have available to me cash that is actually mine, there in my account.

I often get urges to go on spending splurges when I've had a bad day so it's great now that I've no credit card etc because these spends affect me immediately. I suggest you cancel your credit card as it makes shopping sprees more difficult and less fun so you're less likely to do it.

Look into the underlying issue, what makes you feel the need to spend and try and sort that out as opposed to putting yourself under financial strain. Also, don't beat yourself up too much about this. It is not the end of the world and you will be able to pay it back.

nesbitt

pickarooney wrote: »

How does this work exactly? Are you conscious while you're shopping that you're in the process of ruining yourself financially or do you go into some sort of trance until you get home and realise you've spent thousands of euros you don't have? This is a genuine question as I don't see how giving advice on scrimping and saving is going to help if you're just going to go out and spend a few more grand the next day.

I thought about this aspect too. Yes it is like a trance like state where you are in a kind of denial at the time. Yes is is really freaky and stupid.