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Don't know what to do..

  • 19-10-2009 2:45pm
    #1
    Umaro
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,561 ✭✭✭


    'Emily' and I have been dating for 2 months now, been proper boyfriend and girlfriend for one month. We're 22 and 21.

    We get on really well, she laughs at my dumb jokes, we hold hands etc. etc. I care for her a lot.

    In January/February she is leaving for a semester abroad sort of thing on the other side of the world.

    I knew about the semester abroad thing when we started dating and when I asked her to be my girlfriend she told me she did not want to do long-distance if we were still together when she was going. I felt the same way, I really really don't want to do a long-distance relationship at all.

    But I thought that the 4 months or so we'd have together before she left would be fun, she agreed with me and we went official.

    Lately it seems she's changed her mind about the long distance thing and wants to do it. I'm still adamant that I don't want to do it. So now she's forcing the issue and it's pissing me off. I don't want to have to put my foot down and make it clear that this relationship has an expiry date, I like her, I like this, I'd rather spend the next few months happy with her than sad without her.

    I've known a lot of people that did long-distance relationships and I've only ever seen one that worked out. More often than not someone ended up hurt, or things did not work out. I don't want the responsibility of something like that, and the fact she'll be going for 5 months when we'll only have been together 4 makes it an even bigger commitment.

    Help?


Comments

  • #2
    squonk
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 10,299 Mod ✭✭✭✭squonk


    It's only 5 months... I know you're only together 4 but still, it's not like she's going away for a year on foreign study or whatever. I've known LDRs to work out, and they were proper LDR's i.e. going on for years.

    Why don't you relax and let things go as they will. It sounds like she's willing to stand back and see that their might be more to this from her part but you're not willing to do the same. You should end it now if that's the way you feel. Let her find someone who is open to the idea of being with her longer than 4 months. I think you're just killing time. It's not fair on her.


  • #3
    Black Swan
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,812 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    Umaro wrote: »
    I don't want to have to put my foot down and make it clear that this relationship has an expiry date
    Wouldn't this be more honest and fair to her?
    Umaro wrote: »
    I like her, I like this, I'd rather spend the next few months happy with her than sad without her.
    Have you shared these feelings with her?


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