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Sigh...another tale of heartbreak

  • 19-10-2009 11:35am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi Guys,

    Sigh, another break up thread. I'm sitting inw ork now trying to hold myself together so I won't go into too much detail for fear I start crying!!

    I was going out with my bf for 5 years, we broke up 2 weeks ago. There were plenty of warnings signs so while I'm not in shock, I am heartbroken. He told me that he loves me but somehwre in him he knows I'm the wrong girl for him. He told me he fins me irresistably sexy and that makes it so hard for him to walk away cause he fancies me so much but realises that's not enough.

    I may get slated for this, but I need to be honest with you all if I'm gonna get some straight up advise. I looked at his emails (I looked at his emails). The reason I did this was because I wanted to see if there was really another reason he eneded, was he cheating, was he using me etc. I was in a frantic upset mood last night when I did this.

    There wasn't anything to incriminating, but there were messages to girls on facebook just syaing hey, I like your profile picture. Things like that.

    This to me is in the same vein as cheating. he may not have cheated, but he had intent to cheat in my book.

    He is 32 and I am 27. I really loved him and really wanted this to work out.

    I feel absolutely awful and just thought writing it down might help. We have agreed to not have any contact which is tough cause we used to talk everyday and email too.

    How do I re-adjust and just cut ties after giving 5 years of my life to this man.

    How can he just walk away and why was he messaging random girls on fb while he was with me:(

    Feel so f*cking blue


Comments

  • #2
    Peggypeg
    Closed Accounts Posts: 578 ✭✭✭Peggypeg


    Hey Sweetie, I'm 27 too. A five year relationship ended for me 3 & 1/2 years ago, I'm with my current boyfriend 3 years now and I love him more than anyone else in the world. I know it feels like you've wasted time but you haven't, we're still young and believe me there are plenty more fish in the sea. Keep your chin up, it'll get better over the next while. There's not really much you can do as you didn't make this decision. Big Big Big hugs to you, best thing you can do at the moment is get some choccy, call the girls round and watch some romcoms.


  • #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Hi there.

    I got dumped by my bf of five years when I was 27 and he was 32 as well.

    And it was horrific. Waaaay worse than I ever thought being dumped was going to be. Took a year to get over it. I wouldn't worry too much about a few girls on facebook, he was probably think more along the lines of settling down with you or not and he probably had to make the decision not, probably because at both your ages things start get serious and it really is a case of in or out. As you already know, it probably wasn't easy for him to walk away either. He probably hasn't forgotten you or stopped loving you, he is just making the best decision for both of you. Better now than in a few years time. I'm afraid you'll just have to go through this pain but the good news is that its not going to last forever. And when you come out of this you'll be a sexy 27/28 year old which is the best thing in the world to be and you WILL fall in love again. In many ways I'm glad the relationship I had didn't last 'forever' because I grew so much in the years that followed. You're at the end of one thing but at the start of a new adventure.

    Best of luck.


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