lesbian sex advice

LegacyUser

I am not quite sure how to phrase this question. I have very little sexual experience. I am a lesbian and have started seeing my first girlfriend recently. Everything is good between us....except for the sex. She is not very experienced, and as I have said, neither am I.

We have tribbed, and general humping gets me off. I however don't seem to like fingers at all. The idea of fingering myself has never been that appealing to me during masturbation and everytime my girlfriend tries to do it to me I have to ask her to stop. I wouldn't go as far as to say it hurts, but it is uncomfortable and not at all pleasureable.

Is this normal for some women to just not like fingers in their vagina? She has been quite shocked about my discomfort about it, but has been understanding and supporting. But honestly it is making me start to dread doing anything sexual because I know I wont enjoy it. I am really scared and worried that I am abnormal. Please help. Many thanks.

LegacyUser

relax, as if you dont relax you wont enjoy anything. what you and your girlfriend should do is light some candles in the bedroom, put on some soft music and use massage lotion on each other take your time massaging. kiss and touch each other slowly everywhere on the body and be open minded to explore! see what ticks you and her off and talk about it and the rest will come ;o)

Good luck!

LegacyUser

Well to be honest any kind of penetration, if you aren't used to it, can be uncomfortable. I found it agonising at first due to being very tensed up I presume and just not comfortable with the idea. I think a lot of it was a mental block though as well as a physical thing. With my first girlfriend I absolutely hated it, but I think now that a lot of that was down to her technique and also the shape of her fingers. I had a very drunken one night stand after that relationship and suddenly it felt amazing and I realised how good it could be.

After that I think I was less nervous about it. I still find though that depending on technique and person it can either be amazing or totally uncomfortable and painful. You need to be very turned on though and be quite gentle at first. You could google a few techniques as well so that you both know what you are doing. But....with so many other things to do, there really is no need for you to ever be doing it if you don't want to.

Have her use her fingers on your clitoris instead, try oral etc. A lot of people don't come from penetration anyway so it isn't the be all and end all, it is just another optional part of the process.

shoegirl

A lot of gay women like performing oral sex or having it performed on them. Some don't - its just a preference.

This book was rather popular a few years back.