Old Cat & New Kitten

Yenwod

We have a cat who's about 7 yrs old. We got a new kitten 2 months ago. They are both females.

As expected on the first few meetings, the older cat was none to impressed, did a bit of that low groaning/miaowing and would want to just get back out into the garden but they were gradually getting used to each other. If the kitten got a bit too playful, the cat would give her a few digs but always quite gently and with claws in. When they're out in the garden, they've a great time rolling around and stalking each other so I thought all was going well.

The past few days however, the older cat seems very grumpy. Brought her in today to sit on my lap, show her a bit of attention. The kitten arrived and the cat was hissing and scowling and at one point hit her with the claws out. We kept them seperated for the rest of the day and I let the cat sleep undisturbed on her favourite spot up in my room. When I went to put her out for the night, she hissed and angrily miaowed at me the whole way down the stairs. I think if I had have gone anywhere near her, she would have really gone for me.

We have had many cats in my life, introduced new arrivals etc but I've never experienced any cat getting angry with the owners...especially after seemingly getting used to the new arrival. Any ideas what could be up??

JKM

We are experiencing the same problem with our cat. The only difference is our original cat (a boy) is just a year old and the two new arrivals (a boy and a girl) are just turned 6 months. Just like you, the indroduction was nerve wrecking, but for the last good few months they have been best pals. It's only over the last few days the older cat has started to act out of character. I posted a thread here a few days ago to see if anyone had any ideas. One person suggested that maybe my older cat was beginning to feel territorial towards the younger male as he was just 'coming of age'. This made a lot of sense as, even though the older one was showing agression towards us and the young female kitten, it was moreso towards the young male. He also showed the most agression towards us when we were interacting with the young male. We have just had both kittens nuetered so we are hoping the issue will resolve itself soon.

Maybe, seen as both your cats are female, something similar may be happening. What age is your new kitten? If she is around 6 months you should consider spaying her as she could be coming into heat soon. This could be causing the older cat to feel like she needs to assert her dominance.

Hope everything sorts itself out. I kone how distressing it is when your pets are unhappy.

Rancid

Yenwod wrote: »

We have a cat who's about 7 yrs old. We got a new kitten 2 months ago. They are both females.

As expected on the first few meetings, the older cat was none to impressed, did a bit of that low groaning/miaowing and would want to just get back out into the garden but they were gradually getting used to each other. If the kitten got a bit too playful, the cat would give her a few digs but always quite gently and with claws in. When they're out in the garden, they've a great time rolling around and stalking each other so I thought all was going well.

The past few days however, the older cat seems very grumpy. Brought her in today to sit on my lap, show her a bit of attention. The kitten arrived and the cat was hissing and scowling and at one point hit her with the claws out. We kept them seperated for the rest of the day and I let the cat sleep undisturbed on her favourite spot up in my room. When I went to put her out for the night, she hissed and angrily miaowed at me the whole way down the stairs. I think if I had have gone anywhere near her, she would have really gone for me.

We have had many cats in my life, introduced new arrivals etc but I've never experienced any cat getting angry with the owners...especially after seemingly getting used to the new arrival. Any ideas what could be up??

As JKM mentioned, it could have something to do with the little kitten coming of age. She's probably around 4 or 5 months old now so that would make sense.

As regards the playfulness in the garden, I'm guessing it's more "neutral territory" than inside the house, and they're interacting only with each other out there, and you're not involved.

I'm very familiar with the situation you describe where you have the older cat on your lap and the younger new addition approaches and the hissing and spitting start. AND with the protests at being sent downstairs at bedtime! Serious anger and it was directed at ME every time.
I think it all came down to the original cat realising that she was not now the ONLY cat and she held ME responsible for this!
Sending her downstairs was the equivalent of taking away one of the only little privileges (of being the dominant cat) she had left.

Best thing you can do is get the kitten spayed as soon as you can and then give both of them time to adjust. Treat your older cat as the dominant one, perhaps feed her first each time, more individual attention when *she* wants it.
Hope it works out!

Rancid

JKM,
How's Ollie getting on with the kittens now?
Any improvement yet?

JKM

Hey Rancid,
He's definately improved a bit. We've been paying him loads of attention. The bedroom has always been his favourite place so we've allowed him be in there on his own without the kittens. He seems to appreciate this, and to be honest it's the only way he'll stay indoors at the moment.

We have went back to using some of the tactics we used when first introducing them. Letting the kittens into his space when he's out (I think you suggested that), not forcing them to be together. I found Oscar and Ollie curled up together last night, so just left them at it. We must be doing something right!

Thanks for all your advice, you really seem to know your stuff when it comes to cats. Who knew we would have to take on the role of peacekeepers when we brought new cats home! It can be very stressful. They are totally worth it though.

Rancid

JKM wrote: »

Hey Rancid,
He's definately improved a bit. We've been paying him loads of attention. The bedroom has always been his favourite place so we've allowed him be in there on his own without the kittens. He seems to appreciate this, and to be honest it's the only way he'll stay indoors at the moment.

We have went back to using some of the tactics we used when first introducing them. Letting the kittens into his space when he's out (I think you suggested that), not forcing them to be together. I found Oscar and Ollie curled up together last night, so just left them at it. We must be doing something right!

Thanks for all your advice, you really seem to know your stuff when it comes to cats. Who knew we would have to take on the role of peacekeepers when we brought new cats home! It can be very stressful. They are totally worth it though.

Good to know they're settling down a bit for you. Now that the kittens are over the op, peace should be restored, somewhat.
If Ollie and Oscar are snuggling up together, that's a very positive sign.
Keep going... you're on the right track, definitely!

Yenwod

Hey guys, thanks for the advice. The older cat (Jessie) was a lot let hissy today...maybe she was just hungover and grumpy yesterday I just got quite freaked out because none of our cats have ever gotten aggressive with us and Jessie was always such a good natured cat.

I think Mixie (the kitten) has learned from yesterday to be a bit less mental as she approaches Jessie and so is slinking around the place, it's very funny. Hopefully realtions will further improve when we get her spayed in about 2 months or so.

Thanks again!

Dixie Chick

I kind of have this situation as well. I have an older tom and recently a new stray girl has adopted me. They seem to get on okay in fairness but he goes from licking her head to biting her neck to licking her head and I am not sure what to make of this. Also she is kind of meek and he is super energetic and I dont know what to think. Are they getting on or what.

Himself is spayed since the begining of the year and I will get herlself done as well soon, I kind of suspect she is pregnant already though cos she came to me quite fat but her belly has shrunk but she doesnt look like she is nursing.

Rancid

Dixie Chick wrote: »

I kind of have this situation as well. I have an older tom and recently a new stray girl has adopted me. They seem to get on okay in fairness but he goes from licking her head to biting her neck to licking her head and I am not sure what to make of this. Also she is kind of meek and he is super energetic and I dont know what to think. Are they getting on or what.

Allowing the established older cat to show the new-arrival who is boss seems to be working well in your case, as long as real war doesn't break out between them. I think he's accepting her while putting her in her place all at the same time.
I've always noticed that if the older cat is male and the new arrival is female the trouble seems to get sorted out more easily, two males being the most difficult.

Oh.. and do get her to the vet to get spayed asap.

Rancid

Yenwod wrote: »

I think Mixie (the kitten) has learned from yesterday to be a bit less mental as she approaches Jessie and so is slinking around the place, it's very funny. Hopefully realtions will further improve when we get her spayed in about 2 months or so.

Thanks again!

Mixie is learning who's boss! That doesn't mean they'll live happily ever after but it's a good start.

Dixie Chick

Rancid wrote: »

Allowing the established older cat to show the new-arrival who is boss seems to be working well in your case, as long as real war doesn't break out between them. I think he's accepting her while putting her in her place all at the same time.
I've always noticed that if the older cat is male and the new arrival is female the trouble seems to get sorted out more easily, two males being the most difficult.

Oh.. and do get her to the vet to get spayed asap.

Oh thanks for that post, he is kinda setting out whose boss so but in a non violent way, well non too violent way. I am not sure if she is pregnant, I am actually going to have to get a cop on but she is such a nervous wee thing who only now has trust for me that I am slow to force her into a carrier and a vet.

Yenwod

Rancid wrote: »

Mixie is learning who's boss! That doesn't mean they'll live happily ever after but it's a good start.

Yeah definitely a good thing because Mixie is one of the most confident cats I've had, from day one she was all over the place. No nerves at all. I wouldnt like the older cat to start getting nervous of her playful ways and becoming submissive.

Trubertq

I posted a while ago about the same situation. Our older cat Eddie is 11 and the kitten in 20 weeks now, the situation has not improved one iota!! Eddie won't come in, hisses and spits at ME(Whats that about!!) eats outside, and is generally very peed off, he has more or less moved next door to MIL! WE've had the kitten since August. So I guess we'll have to wait another while for peace to reign....maybe I should get Hillary to call while she's over!!:)
Anyway, I got the kittens jabs today the ones for leukaemia and cat 'flu she is looking very sad on tha armchair this evening, wuld this be a normal reaction to the jabs?

Karmella

Hi, glad i found this thread (with the search function down I wasn't able to look) ... We have a two year old female and last weekend took in a very young kitten (3 months maybe?) and all hell broke loose!! The older cat is the queen of her domain and has the run of the whole house (this is our own fault as we totally spoilt her and allowed her to sleep wherever she liked )

Anyway, we left the kitten in a room with litter and food and slowly introduced her to the cat. Initially they sniffed and touched noses but then the weirdest thing happened - the kitten was more aggressive and was really squaring up to the cat!! Couldn't believe this really. So we'd have to lock her up again so the cat could have some peace. Everytime she was let out then the same thing would happen again - she would just drive the cat mad. Anyway we've put it down to the kitten being really hyper and just wanting to 'play' all the time. For the first few days our cat was really put out by the kitten, so much so that she would just leave the house in a huff. The kitten just will not leave her alone, she attacks her the whole time, and follows her around. Now the cat fights back aswell mind and has given her some good wallops (but never claws) and the kitten just bounces back and jumps up at her again. The kitten has even made the cat just run out the cat flap to get some peace!!

So we think that once the kitten calms down a bit they may get on OK, but that won't be for a while yet!! WE have been trying to make the cat feel comfortable by feeding her first and petting her and not petting the kitten, but she's still pretty upset with us. We have been separating them in teh mornings aswell, so that the cat can sleep in her spot upstairs. OUr next step now is to introduce the kitten to the garden, although she's still a little small to use the flap. I hope that when they can both come and go as they please that things will calm down.

I suppose my question is ... do cats ever get along? especially 2 females? I really hate upsetting our cat, but it would make me feel better I guess if I knew that they would get better. Has anyone any other tips on how to ease the settling in process?

JKM

It will get better (not a promise, but it's fairly likely). You only brought the kitten home last weekend? If so, just give it a bit of time. Slowly introduce them. Always give both cats the opportunity to get away, i.e. don't force them to be in the same room with no escape route. When the older cat is gone out, leave the kitten into the other cats space. One good tip I got that worked wonders was: take a towel or something and rub down the older cat with it, then rub the kitten down with the same towel. The older cats smell will transfer to the kitten and mean that the she will smell more familiar (cats are highly perceptive to new/strange smells). Bringing them both to the garden is a good idea as it is somewhat nuetral teritory.

Don't worry about the aggressive behaviour. The kitten is only testing boundaries (young and foolhardy!) while the older cat is asserting her authority and dominance by swiping at the kitten. She's just letting her know who's boss.

In my case I introduced two kittens to an older male. The first good few meetings were disastrous, then after just over a week, the older cat just seemed to give in and get over his sulk. It won't always be rosy though, they get stroppy every now and then. Our older cat is being very moody at the minute. They are just like humans really. We have our good and bad days.

Hope it gets better for you soon.