How do i fix this??

josh90

Hi guys, me and my girlfriend have been seeing eachother about a year now. On saturday night i was out with mates and she was out with mates, as i was going into the club she was just leaving and we chatted/kissed for a few mins. I was quite drunk at this stage and was suggesting some things to her about going on dates etc. Next day i txt her and she was being very blunt, same again yesterday, so i asked what was wrong and she said i was being weird the other night, being pushy and she didnt like the way i was acting, i apologised several times and said can we forget bout sat night and i will not act that way again, she said ok.
Havent heard from her today now, im getting kinda worried, i really like this girl and dont want to ruin everything over a drunken night. What can i do to remedy this situation, should i txt her? give her some time?
thanks Josh

kittenkiller

Phone her and ask.

Admit that you were drunk and ask if there's anything you're not remembering about the meeting.
Maybe she's just busy.

Only thing to do is call her and talk about it before it's blown up out all proportion.

josh90

I told her last nite, that i was drunk and sorry for the way i acted, i didnt realise i was doing it and it wont happen again, and i also said can we just forget about sat, she said ok i guess....i dont know whether to let her calm down for a bit or txt her again.

secondchance

Maybe she didn't want to just "forget" about Saturday night, maybe she wants to talk about it and discuss why she's upset rather than just ignoring the situation. Forget texting anyway, definitely not the right medium for discussion! Phone her, maybe say something like "Do you want to meet up and have a chat about Saturday night, I know I was a bit of a drunken mess and I'm really sorry".

Lollipops23

erm, am i the only person who finds it weird that she's never seen you drunk in a year...???

it was a one off where you acted a bit out of character, if it's the reason she's ignoring you she's a tool tbh. you don't end a year-long relationship over a bit a drunken banter.

secondchance

Who said she'd never seen him drunk before? Clearly it wasn't "banter" if she's upset by it. Obviously someone isn't going to break off a one year relationship just on account of seeing their partner drunk but if that drunkeness caused hurt/embarassment to her then it's definitely something that needs to be discussed. Drunkeness isn't the problem (I assume as this is an Irish forum!!) but behaviour towards your partner while drunk can definitely be a problem if it causes them hurt... just my opinion anyway!

Wibbs

I'm kinda with Lollipops23 on this one, but I'd go further. OK you screwed up. Badly in her eyes. Try to not do it again. She gets in a huff over this. Grand her prerogative as your actions have upset her. Firstly you should have rung her, but I understand how a text seems like a good plan, but in future speak to her or any other woman you're with.

Now this is the part where I go further and what I would do in your situation. You've apologised. More than once. Stop now. She either accepts an apology or she doesn't. End of If she's in a strop now, she's either got other issues with you, she's testing your resolve or she's doing it for some daft leverage. Lets face it you were hardly ringing kittens necks in front of her so one apology should be enough.

OK that's her outa the way. Next look at yourself. Do you apologise to her just to "keep her sweet" or avoid hassle, without resolving not to do things again? If so then you need to work on that. I've worked on myself long enough that now my apologies mean something so if I fcuk up(and everyone fcuks up) I apologise clearly and unequivocally but only the once. If I get too much static after that I won't apologise a second time for the quiet life. Say what you mean and mean what you say and then you should only have to say it once, because people will know that about you.

Call her, tell her clearly that you apologise for any discomfort you gave her from your actions or words. If she goes off on one, let her get it out, that's cool, she may well need to if all you've talked about is through txts, but don't let her make you feel more guilt than you should. If she does continue or escalates it, quietly and calmly say OK maybe it's best if we leave this subject and come back to it again. Say goodnight or whatever we'll talk tomorrow. Hang up or walk away. The balls in her court then.

josh90

Well i txted her this afternoon saying i hope everything isnt ruined over one night etc and that we need to sort it out when your ready, she txted back saying that she would txt me after college. She does be finished at 7 but she never txted me. Now i am really confused!

Wibbs

Honestly? Maybe I've little patience for this stuff anymore, but I wouldn't be the one confused in your shoes. As you said, if she is willing to screw over a years relationship over something minor, or because she likes to play the martyr card, well then let her, but don't wait by the phone for her. As I said, the balls in her court now. IMHO Dont try or apologise any more. Or you'll be apologising for many more things in your life together. Hell I know guys and gals who've married this type of behaviour(if this is indeed what shes up to).

martdalto

You're going out together roughly a year and still can't "speak" to each other.

There's something a miss.

You asked a few times should you text her. You were told a few times to ring her.

You texted anyway, she's not really replying.

It's much harder to ignore someone when you are actually speaking to them. If you want to know what's going on you are going to have to pluck up the courage to talk to your girlfriend.

Ring her.

hollis12

mate you dont need to fix it, just your attitude that you need to fix it, you might have gotten too drunk everyone does it unless your a alcoholic that shouldnt kill a relationship if it did then really its the girls loss, and i would consider it a bullet dodged!