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The rough ending

  • 04-10-2009 8:41pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,190 ✭✭✭


    Had a girl that i was kind of friends with benefits with for a while. Was veering off into something unhealthy and one sided so cut contact and explained but she said i was too nice and that it would take her longer now to get over it. Should i have just gone all out asshole?

    In these situations should you try be an asshole to make things easier? I know to a certain extent it does make things easier if you don't act "nice" but how far in the other direction should you go? If you go too far accidentally then i figure it's just going to make the person more upset rather then a cleaner break, have the situation stuck up in their mind as a horrible experience.

    I can't say I've ever really been dumped before but i know that if i wasn't on good terms with someone it was a lot easier to part. Anyway it's probably safer to leave the situation as is. i think trying to send a message clearing things up on the asshole front will just make it dead messy... What's the best thing to do in these situations?


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,556 ✭✭✭MizzLolly


    The best thing to do is to be honest. Being nice was fine. The girl sounds like a bit of an attention seeker. Some people just love drama! Keep being nice and keep doing the right thing.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,163 ✭✭✭✭Liam Byrne


    As long as you were yourself.

    TBH, there's a "damned if you do and damned if you don't" vibe when it comes to a lot of women; if you're "too nice", they either don't want to get with you in the first place or don't want to get over you......


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 342 ✭✭phic


    there's really no nice way to dump someone! it doesn't matter if you do it like a nice guy, or do it like an asshole, telling someone you dont want them in your life anymore is still gonna hurt like fcuk!
    She'll probably just moan that you were an asshole not to dump he like an asshole anyway, so don't worry she'll still get her anger out!
    ok i'm kinda rambling, hope you get my point!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 15 secondchance


    Definitely better to be nice about it, ok she says it will be harder for her to get over you but I'd rather take a bit longer to get over a nice guy who "just wasn't that into me" (to quote the book!) than to feel bad for sleeping with a guy who turned out to be an asshole and start feeling used and bad about myself!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 28 Certi Layla!!


    Well i have been in this situation twice with an ex boyfriend who i was with for 2 years (the same fella the two times) it became and on-off thing. anyway first time it ended he was the asshole, it made me like him ten times more he used to just be ignorant and all... i thrived on it mad for him anyhow. after it settled down, it reoccured but once again it finished but he was nice about it and so was i.. we decided to be friends so after it all i got over him way quicker when he was nice about the whole thing.. never looked back. good friends now:D

    believe it or not nice is the way to go:D


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