the rat race.. give it up?

doubtfir3

Hi all,

In a bit of a quandry here..

I've currently got a job where I get a high salary, and used to get great kicks out of it.. I've always worked exceptionally hard and tend to fall into the "kill myself for work" category.

Basically, over the last 6-9 months, work is no longer fun, I'm not enjoying it and have been thinking about leaving it and becoming self-employed (IT industry).

My girlfriend and her son were living in another part of the country and so we put a lot of the "stress" and unhappiness down to all the travelling I was doing and thought it would pass.

They both moved here about three months ago and we have gotten on famously, we moved into a new house and have coped excellently with the initial trials of moving in together and in getting the house in shape etc, and always planned on holding on to the house for perhaps 5 years, and spoke about my remaining in my job for about 5 years while we got a chunk paid off the mortgage.

After this, we were intending to look at relocating and that I would relax somewhat.

But, I have found that as time is going on, I'm thinking more and more about giving up my job, and going back to being self-employed - which I used to always enjoy much more in the past.. I was my own boss, admittedly made a lot less money that I do now, but I was happy.

And that I think is the key for me.. I've found myself looking at friends who earn much less, but seem much happier.. they get up go to work but come home and relax..

They work to live as opposed to living to work.. which is where I seem to be.

I would be interested in peoples thoughts and comments.. I have more details but don't want to lengthen the post any more.. I know its a common thought from people but was just wondering about other peoples thoughts...

Thanks

kmick

Question is can you support your partner, kids, house via contract/self employment? If the answer is yes then I think you know the answer yourself. Make sure to discuss it with your OH but remember most OH's including mine dont like the idea of the unknown so you ma need to provide facts and figures to back up your ideas.

ManOfMystery

I think you're on the right track with your thoughts above.

Life is all about balance. Too much of any one thing is never good - be it drink, drugs, work, laziness, food, etc. The happiest people I know aren't those who make millions from working all hours, but have no personal time ........ but neither is it the people I know who are living on benefits and seem to have no worries in life - they also have no ambitions and no focus.

The happiest people I know are the ones who have struck the right balance; a 9-5 job which challenges them (it may not make them millionaires, but it pays enough for them to be comfortable) and enough free evenings and weekends to spend quality time with friends and family and maintain a good outlook on life.

In this day and age it's common for people's main focus in life to be as successful as possible; and most people equate their bank balance with that success. I'm guilty of that also, but I'm trying to get out of that way of thinking as it inevitably involves many long hard evenings. Work doesn't scare me, but what's the end goal - will I actually be any better off mentally?

We all die eventually, and when my time comes I don't think it will matter one iota how much money happened to be in my bank balance at the time, or how high I climbed up the corporate ladder. I'll still be in a box somewhere. Someone will only have replaced me in the job, and my money will likely have been spent or donated. It's more important to me that during my time on Earth I made my family happy, my friends happy, and that I also made my partner happy and gave her the life she wanted. And although I don't have kids yet, I hopefully will in future - and I'll die proud if I know they grow up happy and well adjusted.

iguana

An important thing to bear in mind is that the country is not the same place that it was a few years ago. So if you want to return to being self-employed don't assume that things will be the same as they were when you were last working for yourself. Do a LOT of research into the market for your skills and how much you can expect to earn and be brutally honest in your assessment.

Also work out your outgoings, what you will cut and how you will cope in relation to unavoidable increasing outgoings, such as property tax, rising interest rates, water charges, carbon taxes etc.

I don't mean to sound very negative, but now may not be the best time to leave secure employment, especially as you own property.

PeakOutput

read the 4 hour work week

even if you ave no intentions of starting your own business it has great chapters on escaping the work to enjoy your life later mentality

LegacyUser

iguana wrote: »

I don't mean to sound very negative, but now may not be the best time to leave secure employment, especially as you own property.

I would agree with this. Sometimes you hear great stories about people who opted out of the rat race and found their calling in another lesser paid job, but I personally know two people who did this and are struggling to get by on a quarter of what they used to earn.

Have you thought about taking up an interest outside work? If all your energies and efforts are going into your job, and you're not very happy in it, then it's going to affect your whole life.
Having an interest/doing a course/hobby outside office hours or at the weekend gives a balance. It means that your job is your job and you're still in the 'rat race' somewhat but but it's not everything, your happiness does not depend on what you do 9-5.

doubtfir3

ManOfMystery wrote: »

The happiest people I know are the ones who have struck the right balance; a 9-5 job which challenges them (it may not make them millionaires, but it pays enough for them to be comfortable) and enough free evenings and weekends to spend quality time with friends and family and maintain a good outlook on life.

...


We all die eventually, and when my time comes I don't think it will matter one iota how much money happened to be in my bank balance at the time, or how high I climbed up the corporate ladder.

That's exactly the thought I'm arriving at myself.. I've seen several friends (older and around the same age) who worked as hard as me, and some are now "crocked" from not looking after themselves (now 50+ years old), others have worked hard and constantly tell me to look after number 1.. family and life balance.

I see friends who worry somewhat about the future, but are more concerned about maintaining their work/life balance now. They jog, fish, surf, work on cars etc etc etc.. I do none of that, I get up each morning at 6:30, work through from 7:30 to 6pm (or later), and pretty much constantly on call, work during holidays, never relax and am shattered by 8pm falling asleep on the couch.

Its not how I planned things!

iguana wrote: »

I don't mean to sound very negative, but now may not be the best time to leave secure employment, especially as you own property.

This is another important aspect.. I have done this in the past, and know that I can pull in probably 40k of work per year, and live reasonably comfortably on perhaps 30k. If I push for work, I can pull in more that that as I have a lot of contacts from previous work.

Nothing is guaranteed, and I absolutely realise that I would be taking a drop in salary of about 90k. A huge drop, but I do wonder (in an entirely non-romanticised way) if it would all be worth it.

Less money, and my partner has gone back to college to study screams at me that it is madness to even consider this.. but I can't help but see the overwhelmingly positive elements it will bring to my life which leaves it firmly at the forefront.

doubtfir3

Something Else wrote: »

Have you thought about taking up an interest outside work? If all your energies and efforts are going into your job, and you're not very happy in it, then it's going to affect your whole life.

I have started working on bits and pieces around the house alright which I do greatly enjoy.. I get to work on my garden, some DIY in and around the house (hello DIY forum! ) which I enjoy, but I guess that the *spark* I had in the past has now fizzled out.

We have discussed it at length and it won't be decided in the space of a day or two by any means... its time to start some number-crunching and see how we get on!

dudara

If you choose to go down the self-employed route, then you will no longer be a PAYE worker and the rules are very different wrt PRSI/benefits.

Make sure to investigate all this carefully.

But I do like your sentiment. Life is too short and too precious to be stuck doing something you don't enjoy and are not passionate about.

Ishindar

i was in exactly the same position as u OP 6 years ago.
i decided i would hang in there and work towards freedom.
we lived moderately, saved hard and paid off the mortgage bit by bit.
then last year the recession struck and i was made redundant and got a nice package, the timing was perfect.
I now have a minimal mortgage and unfortunately unemployed still but life couldnt be better. with the roof over our heads all but paid for we wont be worrying much about money.

The_Conductor

OP- IT contracting is going through a major drought at the moment- I'd be very hesitant to advise anyone give up a fulltime job to go contracting (even if the rates are pretty good). Most of the consultancy firms (Accenture, HP etc) have given their contractors significant reductions in pay. Be very careful and carry out your research properly before taking the leap.

Lots of people are deeply unhappy with their jobs at the moment- we're all getting pay cuts- and as people retire or move on- no-one is being replaced. IT is always high stress- but even moreso at the moment.

Be careful you're not jumping from the fryingpan into the fire......

jollygood

I gave up my extremely well paid job in august...hated it for 7 yrs and people couldn't believe I finally jacked it in in the middle of the recession. I just had to, it was making me ill. I got rid of all my debts first though and also don't have a mortgage which helped.
Since then, I am freelance. I am my own boss and am so much happier as a person. Admittedly I do have an amazing boyfriend as a safety net, if it was to come to that, but since I did leave my salaried job, work has come to me every week, different jobs in my field here and there.
I have the odd day off as well which is good, and I don't miss the rat race one bit. I LOVE not having a boss.
Life is too short, believe in just going for it. What is the worse thing that can happen? Will you starve?
Obviously my experience is very personal to me but I really regret wasting a whole seven years hating something which really was pretty much taking up my whole life....
Hope you work stuff out...

LegacyUser

Hi OP,

Myself and my BF are feeling the same, with all the stuff going on in the news you can feel like another cog in the machine, Our plan is to move to the country from dublin and build a simple life, slower pace, and enjoy the environment and space and start a family.


I was reading a book lately called 'a whole new mind' by daniel pink, he was speaking about how the world is changing from left brain thinking to right brain thinking and so is the future regarding business. Anything that can be outsourced and automated will be to Asia and done for a lot cheaper, it is the right side of the brain that will rule the future according to him, because it is the more creative, innovative side, design, story, symphony(big picture thinking), empathy, play and meaning. A good example is the ipod, it is something that we all didnt know we needed and now everywhere.

We really can open our minds up to believing another way of being is possible, who says you will earn less if you do leave your job, maybe for a transitional period, but money and the lack of it is always focused on too much, emphasis should go on how much there is out there and how plentiful it is.


If anyone can change their life for the better it should be attempted as much as possible.

unhappycamper

Do not let the R word stand in your way. I started my new business in Jan, I rent a premises etc... I am doing just fine.