Silly?!

LegacyUser

ok this maight sound really silly but i broke up with my ex at christmas, last few months he has been beggin me back and i resisted not that i dont want to get back i just wanted him to really mean it anyways wont bore u all with long drawn out details, we were together nearly two years........anyways he rang last friday he was going on holidays on saturday with some friends.......i have to admit i was pretty cold on the phone to him.........i havent heard from him since.......i learnt yesterday that a few of them had their stuff stolen and his phone was taken but surely he would know my number after 2 years?!!! This guy has been begging me back for weeks and now no contact at all..........i have it in my head that he has met someone else on holidays........am i being stupid? I know he will be at a birthday party we are both going to saturday night, if i dont hear from him how do i react?

Terodil

silly! wrote: »

ok this maight sound really silly but i broke up with my ex at christmas, last few months he has been beggin me back and i resisted [...] anyways he rang last friday [...] i have to admit i was pretty cold on the phone to him.........i havent heard from him since

Are you surprised? Seriously?

You broke up, you refused his attempts to get back together numerous times, you were cold on the phone... maybe he finally got the message and leaves you alone.

I don't know why you would want to react at all now. You two are on your own.

The Real B-man

OP He is probably keeping his Options open i mean if you are giving him the Cold shoulder Have you been with anyone since you split? Hes Human he may or may not have been with anyone but he is Single and you did break up with him.

Taltos

Hold on - let me get this straight - you broke up at Christmas?
That was over 9 mts ago....

Why are you playing these games? I mean it's not like we life for ever?
Either move on or get back - but after 9mts.

Just do not get it...

Am really hoping he has copped onto himself - robbery or no.

prinz

silly! wrote: »

i have it in my head that he has met someone else on holidays........am i being stupid?

What difference does it make to you if he did? . You can't win with some people. Seems to me you were enjoying the drama and attention of a guy trying to get back with you. It was probably a nice ego stroke for you, and now that it may be gone you're starting to worry where you're going to get that kick from now.

ManOfMystery

silly! wrote: »

ok this maight sound really silly but i broke up with my ex at christmas, last few months he has been beggin me back and i resisted not that i dont want to get back i just wanted him to really mean it anyways wont bore u all with long drawn out details, we were together nearly two years........anyways he rang last friday he was going on holidays on saturday with some friends.......i have to admit i was pretty cold on the phone to him.........i havent heard from him since.......i learnt yesterday that a few of them had their stuff stolen and his phone was taken but surely he would know my number after 2 years?!!! This guy has been begging me back for weeks and now no contact at all..........i have it in my head that he has met someone else on holidays........am i being stupid? I know he will be at a birthday party we are both going to saturday night, if i dont hear from him how do i react?

So ......

YOU dumped him
YOU have refused to get back with him
YOU were cold on the phone to him

So why do you care if he met someone else or stopped trying to get back with you? You've made it 100% clear to him how you feel, and also made it clear you don't want back with him.

Are you just enjoying the attention?

LegacyUser

i dumped him cos HE cheated.......i want him back i love him but i want to be sure, in the weeks leading up to him going away there was progress and we were taking things slowly.......he knows im just unsure but i DO want him back.......this isnt an attention thing

ManOfMystery

Silly?! wrote: »

i dumped him cos HE cheated.......i want him back i love him but i want to be sure, in the weeks leading up to him going away there was progress and we were taking things slowly.......he knows im just unsure but i DO want him back.......this isnt an attention thing

Well that changes things entirely, you should have said in your first post that you do want back with him, and the reason you split up is because he cheated.

In that case, then I agree he needs to make the effort. However, if he has genuinely lost his phone then you may have to give him the benefit of the doubt and let him explain in person why he hasn't been in touch.

For what it's worth, I've been going with my gf 2 years and don't know her mobile number by heart. I always just key in her name to my address book so I would have no reason to have memorised the number. I do know her home number though.

puglover

Silly?! wrote: »

i dumped him cos HE cheated.......i want him back i love him but i want to be sure, in the weeks leading up to him going away there was progress and we were taking things slowly.......he knows im just unsure but i DO want him back.......this isnt an attention thing

OK so you either forgive & forget and move on from it together. Or you break up and move on from it yourself.

I mean what are you doing? testing him? punishing him? playing games?

I wouldn't be surprised if he's gotten sick of jumping through hoops for you and wants at the very least a break from it while on hols, possibly if he has sense a permanent break from it

patftrears

silly! wrote: »

...

You are testing him for the past 9 months. Do you not think a mature adult conversation would have been a better solution.


How long are you going to keep testing him, say you get back together, if he does something to upset you in the future will you repeat the same process, do you think these childish games will make him respect you


It's clear that the relationship is unequal and you are trying to break him down so you can feel like you are on the same level.


How do you know he wants you back for who you are. And not because he can't have you and all the drama you are creating. You're actions are not the way to create a health relationship and you are setting yourself up for more heartbreak.

LegacyUser

This isnt a power trip im on here to see if i can break him down.
To clarify when we broke up, we broke up full stop because he cheated. It has not been 9 months of him trying to win me back, more like three. Before he went away the chat we both had i thought was indicating that we could get back together
I was cold because he lied about who he was going on holidays with. I think it is genuine that his phone has been stolen.
I may just have a weird head for numbers!!! I seem to everyone close to me's by heart so point taken about him maybe not knowing my number!
Surely though he is not on a deserted island, im fairly sure he would be able to access email somewhere

puglover

Silly?! wrote: »

This isnt a power trip im on here to see if i can break him down.
To clarify when we broke up, we broke up full stop because he cheated. It has not been 9 months of him trying to win me back, more like three. Before he went away the chat we both had i thought was indicating that we could get back together
I was cold because he lied about who he was going on holidays with. I think it is genuine that his phone has been stolen.
I may just have a weird head for numbers!!! I seem to everyone close to me's by heart so point taken about him maybe not knowing my number!
Surely though he is not on a deserted island, im fairly sure he would be able to access email somewhere

I'm sorry I'm not buying it. He is under no obligation to contact you while he is away, regardless of whether you indicated you would like to get back together or not.

He'll contact you when and if he wants to.