orientation week has just awakened terror inside!! eek!!

LauraLoo

hi guys,

the orientation week for trinity is this week and i was in yesterday for the first time... the thing is, im ready for the academic stuff- im dying to get into the books- the part im finding scary is the socialising.

Everyone was chatting for most of the day and I just dont know how to do it. im a bit of a wall flower. I am comfortable in my own company. I dont see the point in making idle chit chat. But at the same time, I'm feeling a little lonely. I had expectations of myself, that I would come out of my shell but i just went further into myself when I walked into the room... I didnt feel like I belonged (my entire feeling through school). I have become a confident and secure adult (I work in training and speak in front of large groups) but just walking into the lecture hall evoked old feelings of shyness, clumsiness, fear and feeling left out/un-likeable/ social retard...

Its actually effected me so much I dont want to go in today...

anyone else feeling this way? how does one overcome this?

mickstupp

You can start by saying hello to the people beside you before class starts. And after class ask them what they thought of the class. Talking about the class means it's relevant and not the idle chit chat that you don't like, and at the same time you're interacting and maybe slowly getting to know people. It helped get things rolling for me last year. Bear in mind, you're not the only one feeling this way. Chances are, half the folks who look fine are just as nervous as you and will welcome someone saying hi.

Larianne

I was there yesterday and this morning and I understand how you feel. I was very shy at school and it's taken me years to be the person I am today. It can be easy to fall back into that way but I said to myself before going in to just start talking to someone. I went in, sat down beside a guy and said "What course are you doing?" and chatted for a while. Then on the break I spoke to another lady just asking her "It's all a lot to take in" and we chatted for a while before going back into the lecture hall. I met another guy while on lunch and we did the sports tour and book of kells together. Just chatting about everything - how we're feeling about returning to college and how we'll fit in etc. Joining societies etc.

You have to realise, everyone is in the same boat and everyone's nervous. For the rest of the week it's broken down to the course/subject area you're on so you should probably meet people from your course. Although that shouldn't really matter. I still haven't meet anyone from my course yet and my orientation week is finished already.

Just something I observed when I went to the Info Day a few months ago. While on one of the breaks, I saw a girl sitting on her own with her arms folded and a bit of a face on her. In fairness, no one would go talk to her. Your body language will either attract people or repel them. So come across open and friendly. A friendly hello with a smile is all that it can take.

I hope you went in today and just get stuck in there. What's the worst that can happen?!

Edit: I do know it's easier said then done.

Edit 2: Also, think about joining the Mature Student Society and go to the Ceili they're having on the 24th in the Russell Court Hotel. Not really into Ceili's meself but I'm planning on going to just to meet others. Like Simone from the student union said yesterday, just to have someone to have a coffee with, it's worth joining a society.

LauraLoo

thanks for your advice

i went in today and just made myself talk to people... i met someone from my class so it was good to get into further discussion about something other than "idle chit chat" :;)

i think that jut writing it down helped me move on

Larianne

Good to hear. So the rest of the week shouldn't be as daunting! It's next week that's gonna be a shocker!

LauraLoo

eeek!! deep breaths deep breaths...

doctor evil

Is orientation week more for full time first years or everyone new?

LauraLoo

this week's is a mature student orientation week, next week is freshers which will be for all undergraduates (mature and fresh out of schoolers)

IM0

yeah I know what your going through and it sucks :pac:
but it'll pass, especially after freshers week, and the giddy 1st years have settled down a bit...yeah that'll happen :pac:

They wont bite though, but can infurriate :pac: (all the D4/LA speak - oh my Gaaaawd how annoying is that). walkin around campus is the worst though, the kids havent learned that its 'ok' to be seen outside your clique on your own
its a different world for sure, and you would never imagine the world is in 'crisis' in there..its so FRESH, let some of that rub off on you.

theres only afew dozen people in my year, so I have a much 'closer' 'personal' contact with the class, most courses like arts and engineering/science you can get lost in the numbers and blend in.

Do the Mature student societies do T-shirts?
I need one, I look young like a Postgrad, but in my sports gear/shorts (which I wear alot) I could easily be mistaken for a 3/4yr student who should have mates around him at most times, and certainly shouldnt be seen eating a sandwhich on his own, in a cafe..at luch...and taking up a comfy sofa!

tip: most mature students sit up the front..in a row. you can spot them cause there is usually a wide age range 'block' of them...maybe you'd prefer chit chat with them? but TBH Id rather leave the news talk at home