Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

How can I gain confidence/be more secure?

  • 13-09-2009 7:59pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi all,

    I'm a 21 year old girl and I have come to a realisation that i'm quite insecure. I find it very difficult to trust people, I rarely open up to friends about things, particularly my past etc. In relationships with guys it takes me quite a while to open up at all and I find it very difficult to trust them. I'm quite insecure in relation to my body; alot of this is down to a previous boyfriend not being the nicest to me but I know myself I'm not fat and I don't have an awful body, yet I can't see myself as attractive despite knowing that I am.
    As a result I'm always thinking the guy I'm with is looking for someone else not me. It's gotten to the point where I'm just fed up with myself. I know I'm not ugly or fat, quite the opposite and i've been told this numerous times and I get plenty of attention from guys, in fact I could probably pick up whoever I wanted in a club if I tried. So how can I get rid of this insecure weird feeling that I'm not good enough for anyone? Why do I think every other girl out there is better than me?


Comments

  • #2
    Junior #8
    Closed Accounts Posts: 149 ✭✭Junior #8


    You'll find that most people are insecure, for one reason or another.
    It's your character type that some fellas adore, not showy and not attention seeking.
    Boys are pooh, but don't tar us all with the dic**ead brush....
    shouders back, you don't even need to worry about it.
    Ya gotta like who ya are before you like someone else it seems.


  • #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Hi OP,

    It might be a nice thing in a way to look at it like you do not feel you are better than anyone else, like your humble, but if you want to feel like a strong confident woman you have to believe in your good self more,

    also you have a good sense of self awareness, at least you can acknowledge when you want to change something about yourself, these are good traits to have, most times when people are insecure they have not been told enough what their good points are, if you sit down with a notebook- i have a lovely one i bought and i write in it a list of all the things i am grateful for, sometimes i write about my body if i am feelin insecure about it, the more you can notice and acknowledge all the amazing things about you the more your belief system will strengthen, outweighing the negative beliefs with new positive ones, I could tell you about my problem areas, my pot belly ! but i only realized this year that i had lovely skin, some told me i had nice hands! i was delighted and i remember all these good points now!

    I jave this saying that there is nothing more attractive than a strong confident woman, someone will notice you if you love yourself, the more you can value and love yourself the more people will see it, good luck xx


Advertisement