IS IT ALL JUST TOO MUCH

LegacyUser

Just reading through a few topics here as I was looking for ppl in a similar situation to me. Been through a real bad situation last few months, worst ive ever had to be honest with you.
It seems that there is so much pain to do with relationships, make ups break ups, arguments cheating trust issues etc. etc. etc.

I think im really beginning to lose faith, after the last episode i feel maybe im destined to be alone, in nearly 30 never really had a "proper" realtionship.....i know right,
Have had many offers, but never really felt IT, anyone i do like i seem to either blow it by coming on to strong or they just never feel it, or i waste too much time doing ground work etc. Imean its just like every time i mess something up i learn what i did wrong don't do it the next time but do something else instead....

I admit im not the best when it comes to the ladies, but i am told im very handsome but i suppose this is subjective, I have a good job, nice family, not trying to sound like a big head or anything but i do think that i have alot going for me....

I don't know really just looking for something to give me hope i suppose,

LegacyUser

OP don't give up. I am mid 30s and have just split up with other half in the most painful of circumstances. TThe love is there but for other reasons things can't work out.

The one thing keeping me sane is that old saying of 'What's meant to be won't pass you by' - perhaps you haven't felt the real deal yet, but when you do think of how amazing it will be, and hope that as you are 30 you will be that bit more mature and better able to appreciate it.

Keep up the hope!

Peggypeg

Don't give up but at the same time relax about it. Stop looking for a girlfriend, just look for friends, that way you won't come on too strong and things will progress naturally. Also, there's nothing wrong with being single. Big hugs to you

Jood

You sound like me about 3 years ago. I had a very bad break up and really went into myself and decided that I wasnt going to bother with men anymore and that I was just going to rely on myself cos I wont dissapoint me. Guess what, fast forward 3 years and I'm not that person anymore, I'm not in a relationship at the moment and while I'm not looking for one, I'm open to romantic encounters, I no longer hate men, and although the past will always be with me, i've let go of the hurt, blame and bitterness, put it down to experience and moved on!! Give it time, go out with friends, relax and enjoy yourself, you'll start to feel better soon. And remember this board is for people with issues, thats why it all seems to be hurt and pain, there are happy people in love out there too, they just dont have issues at the moment

VaioCruiser

losing-hope wrote: »

Just reading through a few topics here as I was looking for ppl in a similar situation to me. Been through a real bad situation last few months, worst ive ever had to be honest with you.
It seems that there is so much pain to do with relationships, make ups break ups, arguments cheating trust issues etc. etc. etc.

I think im really beginning to lose faith, after the last episode i feel maybe im destined to be alone, in nearly 30 never really had a "proper" realtionship.....i know right,
Have had many offers, but never really felt IT, anyone i do like i seem to either blow it by coming on to strong or they just never feel it, or i waste too much time doing ground work etc. Imean its just like every time i mess something up i learn what i did wrong don't do it the next time but do something else instead....

I admit im not the best when it comes to the ladies, but i am told im very handsome but i suppose this is subjective, I have a good job, nice family, not trying to sound like a big head or anything but i do think that i have alot going for me....

I don't know really just looking for something to give me hope i suppose,

Hi OP. I am sorry you are feeling so down right now. Don't let it last ! because life is too short to waste it feeling sorry for ourselves :rolleyes: ok ?

Look. If you go to a hospital you see sick people. if you come to a problems forum you see problems :-) It says nothing about what is going on out there in the world where many people are happy and working away at life.

But where does it say that life is going to a smooth ride to happiness ? Life is about the journey. It is about the struggle to learn about people, love people, succeed and fail and succeed again. if you only look at it with blinkers on then you only see the failure. Step back and look at the big picture ok ?

As to your own struggle, I sympathise.. but you need to tell us more about what has been happening in your relationships that has caused them to fail ?

Also just because a relationship ends.... it does not mean it was a failure. Each relationship is an adventure. Enjoy it for however long it lasts and then seek out another one when it ends.

All the best

RossFixxxed

The single biggest fallacy these days is that we are entitled or capable of being happy all the time. That's not to say AT ALL that we should be miserable but the expectation fo being in a happy relationship with a great job, healthy kids and a huge car is just insane. It's forced down our throaths. I'm in a happy one as it happens, but the journey of life is entirely up and down and up and down.

OP Don't rely on ANYONE else to bring you happiness.