Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Is this odd?

  • 09-09-2009 1:25pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Been seein a girl for a while now, gone out on a fair few dates together.

    Odd thing is we usually go the whole night until the end without being very touchy feely or kissing? She just doesn really seem interested in it. Apart from that however we get on great

    Is this odd?


Comments

  • #2
    wexford202
    Closed Accounts Posts: 350 ✭✭wexford202


    In a word 'YES'


  • #3
    ManOfMystery
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,394 ✭✭✭ManOfMystery


    I would say 'No'.

    Some people just aren't touchy feely, not until they get to know the person better. If you've only gone on a few dates then she may be a bit reserved until you've spent a bit more time together.


  • #4
    Faith
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,662 Mod ✭✭✭✭Faith


    Depends what type of date it is. On my first few dates with my boyfriend, we were rarely touchy-feely early on. It was mostly shyness. I'd be dying for him to kiss me, but I'd never make the first move. It got better with familiarity. If you're sitting across from each other at a table (pub, café, dinner), it can be hard to be intimate.


  • #5
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    where is she from ?
    some cultures alot less willing to do the whole p.d.a. thing than others i find


  • #6
    Gyalist
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,537 ✭✭✭Gyalist


    unregified wrote: »
    Been seein a girl for a while now, gone out on a fair few dates together.

    Odd thing is we usually go the whole night until the end without being very touchy feely or kissing? She just doesn really seem interested in it. Apart from that however we get on great

    Is this odd?

    In a word, NO.

    I've highlighted where you said "we" aren't touchy-feely then later you blame her by saying "she" doesn't seem interested.

    I think that she is taking her cue from you. If you are uneasy with touching she will respond likewise.

    Be a man and lead the relationship. If you want to touch her go ahead and do so - you don't have to wait for her explicit permission. If she isn't comfortable with your touch she will let you know.


  • Advertisement
  • #7
    Darthhoob
    Closed Accounts Posts: 339 ✭✭Darthhoob


    i'd say no...it's not odd. least not to me lol. it sounds like me tbh

    not all women are touchy feely, especially in public, and i'd say alot of women dont like to show too much affection too soon. (not saying it is too soon but it could be for her)
    plus take into account some people have itimacy issues, or hypersensitivity...lots of things could be the reason

    i'm sure if she wasn't into you, you'd of been told by now :)


  • #8
    shellyboo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,883 ✭✭✭shellyboo


    If it's only been a few dates, I'd imagine she's trying to seem cool and unclingy and the rest! I think you might have to take the lead in the touchy-feelyness, starting with holding her hand and working up from there!


  • #9
    Jood
    Closed Accounts Posts: 269 ✭✭Jood


    shellyboo wrote: »
    If it's only been a few dates, I'd imagine she's trying to seem cool and unclingy and the rest! I think you might have to take the lead in the touchy-feelyness, starting with holding her hand and working up from there!

    I sooo agree with this, I'm not into touchy-feelyness myself, so when I find myself in the position where I want to be I dont know how to!! Like Shellyboo said start by holding her hand or touching her knee when ye're chatting and see how she responds, chances are shes like me and shes dying for some cuddles but she doesnt know how to start it!!


  • #10
    SarahSassy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,145 ✭✭✭SarahSassy


    Faith wrote: »
    Depends what type of date it is. On my first few dates with my boyfriend, we were rarely touchy-feely early on. It was mostly shyness. I'd be dying for him to kiss me, but I'd never make the first move. It got better with familiarity. If you're sitting across from each other at a table (pub, café, dinner), it can be hard to be intimate.

    + 1

    If you are any way shy it can be hard to be touchy feely at the start


  • #11
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Thanks for the responses

    I do take part blame for it of by the way!

    Maybe i do need to take the lead a bit more, guess i was just afraid of scaring her off!!


  • Advertisement
  • #12
    lifelonglufc
    Closed Accounts Posts: 73 ✭✭lifelonglufc


    My advice: chill about it all, lead the way and go with the flow...if she's not comfortable she'll let you know! Then you know from there on...


  • #13
    Sineadg
    Closed Accounts Posts: 36 ✭Sineadg


    Definitely not odd. I find it really hard to be intimate with someone early on, just doesn't feel right for me until I know someone well. Maybe its my age...Im mid 30s...but the thought of kissing someone I met an hour earlier is just impossible and I was definitely not like that in my teens! But yeah I think its up to you to initiate some physical contact and see how she responds, as if she is like me its the last thing she would do although she might have been at home all day thinking about kissing u!


Advertisement