You decide

hyperone

Everyone has their ups and down’s,
But it is how we get through it,
That turns you around.

You can stand up or lie on the floor,
You can decide to push things away,
Or want them some more.

Events are happening in your life,
And you start noticing things,
You can choose to ignore or accept them,
And see what changes they will bring.

Will it bring happiness or strive,
You decide what you want in your life!
Believe in the power of the mind,
It’s a hidden quality we have inside.

When you believe, you will achieve,
What your heart desires.
You can decide, to turn a blind eye,
Or you can ignite the fires.

The fires are your soul,
Telling you to grab what life has to hold.
To live out your dreams, to reach out to your desires,
You always have a choice,
So what is it to be?
Well it is your choice,
So you decide!

atoms

I love this.
It sang on the very first read!

hyperone

Thanks Atoms for your swift reply. This was my first poem I posted. I had to make a difficult decison last year so I decided to write about it and it really helped me decide what I wanted in my life

pickarooney

Just on the first verse, you switch from 'everyone' (third person) to 'we' (first person) to 'you' (second person) and from 'ups and downs' (plural) to 'it' (singular).

You start off with a kind of meter in the first two stanzas and then discard it for the third, which reads like straight prose.

In other words, aim for more consistency in your next draft of it.

hyperone

Hi there,

Thanks for your comments, there are noted:).

hyperone

Hi Pickarooney, can you please explain to me what you mean by "You start off with a kind of meter in the first two stanzas and then discard it for the third, which reads like straight prose". I am new to this, thanks

pickarooney

Read your poem back to yourself, out loud if needs be. Notice the rhythm of it; you should be able to tap a foot as you read the first two verses. Then notice what happens in the third one.

hyperone

Many thanks, I will try this and see what happens