Cancer diagnosis

Hermy

I just got word today that a member of my family is very ill with cancer.
Any thoughts or advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks.

Deki

I'm so sorry Hermy. When my oldest brother was diagnosed he was very young.The night he came to tell us I refused to believe him. I just couldn't. That was one of the worst nights of my life I think.
They said he only had three months as it was in his lymph system but he's still here and it's well over five years (more like 20) with no reoccurences, so there is always hope.
I don't know of any good way to deal with it. Just try to be supportive of whatever treatment they decide on and take it one day at a time. My thoughts are with you and your family.

Vyse

Really sorry to hear this. Happened to me about two years ago with my dad. Couldn't believe it. I though that cancer was something that happened to somebody else.

The important thing is to stay positive as this can make a big difference to everybody invoved. Cancer is a very treatable condition now. My dad pulled through it and hopefully whoever is close to you will too.

Miaireland

My Mom got diagnosed with Cancer and I completely understand how frighting it is and how upset you feel.

May I suggest you get in touch with http://www.arccancersupport.ie/index2.html. They really are wonderful in offering support to family and friends of people diagnosed with cancer. I found it great to talk to someone who understood and could give me information that I didn't want to ask my Mom and Dad.

tbh

LTI Forum is here for you if you need it Hermy. good luck.

Hermy

Thanks tbh.
I only hope this is longterm.

dublingal80

Im so sorry to hear that. All you can do is be there for them and help them through this any way you can.
Maybe on days they get some treatmetn or the day after, go over to their house and look after them, make them dinner, whatever they fancy as they have to eat. If they are tired, tell them to go to bed. Let them know they dont have to push themselves too hard. They need to listen to their body and do what its telling them.

LegacyUser

I think the thing to remember here is that most of the time cancer is not as bad as people think. One in three people get it. One in three don't die from it. The changes for recovery are good and improving every day. Cancer research is making huge progress at the moment and survival rates are improving all the time.

Don't get too down about it - your relative needs to firstly get their head around the diagnosis themselves & then get into a frame of mind where they can fight it. You're role should be to help them do that.

All going well - you'll both look back on this as a time when you gave them support when they needed it & they'll be only too willing to repay you whenever you need a dig out (hopefully not of the same sort but you know what i mean).

Millions of people have beaten cancer - I'm sure you know some yourself - take heart from that!

Hermy

Thank you all for your replies. They really help.
In the meantime all we can do is stay positive and hope and pray that all will be well.

leesmom

very sorry to hear this.
my advice would be to treat the person as youve always treated them. they are still the same person, yes they are ill with something extremely scary(for want of a better word:rolleyes:sorry) but the person has not changed just because they are ill. i say this from first hand experience of my mum being ill with cancer. people tended to be almost scared to talk to her for fear of upsetting her but normality as much as possible is best.
its no doubt a long and hard road to recovery and i wish your family member the very best and pray that he/she makes a full recovery.

newbie2009

I think just being there for the person and offering a shoulder to cry on or a supportive word will make all the difference in the world and show them that they're not alone