Making new friends again

Blusher

hi all,

I just finished college and i had to move home because i couln't get a job in my choosen career. I had great friends in college and we still meet up although most of them live 4 hours away.

I went to college knowing nobody and all my school friends went together and are now even closer. We have really grown apart and we dont really have anything in common now. I still try to meet up and invite them places but they are usually "busy", they never invite me to anything they are doing!

I want to make some new friends, have girly nights out, go shopping, like back in college but i dont know how, everyone i work with is 35+ and i'm only 20. I know most will say join a club, but i HATE sports, so whats left??

I hate being stuck in on a sat night when i want to be out with friends!

Anyone with any advice?

LegacyUser

Hey, Im really sorry to hear that, dont know if its any consolation but im 21 n in a similar predicament so youre not the only one! There are plenty of legitimate reasons i know but i hvnt got any easy answers. I can only give you the advice Ive got which is if yr not into sports-become part of something else that interests you, what do you like? Would you be up for voluntary work, able to change jobs, move out of home n share with
some new people? Check the paper or the internet for events n fun stuff thats going on, it might be ages away but at least your scattered friends will have plenty of notice to avoid that 'busy' excuse. Are they really good friends tho if they never invite you to stuff? I really really hope you make new friends soon! And sorry im not the best one to offer advice!

Blusher

thanks for the reply......nice to hear i'm not the only one in this situation.

I cant move out because im working a crap job with awful pay so i need to be a home until i can get a job related to my degree.

I was thinking of maybe doing a first aid course, it maight add to my c.v and i could make some friends along the way.

I googled clubs and soc's for my area but alot seem to be for teenagers, i dont know where to look really. Its tough starting again and i am a quiet person until i get to know someone or i click with someone.

It's sad that i don't get on with my school friends anymore, they went into the indie cool scene and im a big girly girl so you can kinda guess why we drifted, although i did try to make an effort to stay in touch.

I never though i'd see myself in this situation at this age, it's really awful, i wouldn't mind if i'd been nasty or was a mean person but there is no point in getting myself down over it, i just need to find something to do or join so i can make new friends!

LegacyUser

It is just crappy circumstances. Well done on being pro-active bout it n looking up things to do tho and for making the effort to keep contact. At least you cant say you didnt try? I guess just recognize that its a rutt and it WILL pass. The first aid course is a great idea and september seems to be a starting month for things to join so maybe try then? Best of luck!

LadyMayBelle

I'm sorry to hear you feel so blue. I've been in similar situations and I know many other people here have too. Sometimes getting out there and joining a club (someone had to say it!) is the best thing. The first aid course sounds great but might that only be a few days long? Go for it for sure but think about some other ways to meet new people. Depending on where you are in the country people might be able to make some suggestions. I'm in Galway if you need to PM me for some info on what to do.

But it is hard, but you've decided to do something and that's fantastic. Good one you.

ladyofthelake

Have you ever thought about a Church? Now, it depends if yours just has 80 year old in attendance then you're outta luck but, if there is one that is halfway decent then they probably have some kind of young adults group.
You'd be surprised that many regular young church goers are not bible thumpers. Have you thought about joining a free online dating service like plentyoffish.com? You'll meet people and guys - some that are a real catch!

Blusher

Im not too sure on the whole meeting people on the web and church idea, but thanks for replying.

I'm almost putting my life on hold here at home in case i got a job in my choosen profession and have to upsticks and move!I'm telling myself to start something new but living in the country there isnt that much and i can be really shy which most people interpret as being sn:eek:oby!