To Ask His Help Or Not?

Kintarō Hattori

Myself and the girlfriend have been talking for the last few years about buying a house but with the silly prices that had been in place we held off. In about 6 months we'll be finished renting our current place and we've decided that if we can help it we'd really prefer not to rent again.

We've spotted a house in a location that we like and it's reasonably priced at just under €200,000. We have about half the deposit saved but we would need help with the rest. We'd need to raise about 10k and the only person I know who would be able to lend us this would be my father. I really really don't want to ask him for help but it would mean the difference between getting the house or not and renting for yet another year. I've always tried to be independent and in my adult life I've never asked him or my mother for anything so it would really be a dent in my pride to have to do this.

We could most likely pay it back within 3 years. I know lots of people get their parents help when buying their first place but I don't know if I should ask. I'd feel it would be arrogant/rude of me to do so. So what would you do if you were in my shoes. Should I ask or not?

spurious

I would ask and if I were your father I would be glad you asked, rather than get yourself into debt.

shellyboo

I say go for it - you sound like you have your head screwed on, and if you've been independent all your adult life, your father might even be glad to help you out.

Your looking for a loan not a hand out.
That is different entirely, I don't see whats to be ashamed of.

Otis Driftwood

Moonbaby wrote: »

Your looking for a loan not a hand out.
That is different entirely, I don't see whats to be ashamed of.

+1

The vast majority of my friends that have bought their own place have gotten help from their folks.Its very hard to try and save anything meaningful while renting,never mind a deposit for a house.

iguana

There is an extremely, extremely high probability that house prices will fall quite a bit more. It is also a certainty that interest rates will rise in the next few years. I would honestly recommend waiting another year or two to buy. Take a look at the accommdation/property forum or www.thepropertypin.com and seriously reconsider buying right now.

Kintarō Hattori

iguana wrote: »

There is an extremely, extremely high probability that house prices will fall quite a bit more. It is also a certainty that interest rates will rise in the next few years. I would honestly recommend waiting another year or two to buy. Take a look at the accommdation/property forum or www.thepropertypin.com and seriously reconsider buying right now.

Thanks iguana,

I've read up and heard that prices might continuing downwards as much as 10% but there is talk that they'll pick up again in 2011. To be honest the place we were looking at is in a good location and it's very reasonably priced so I think now is a good time to do so.

ChewChew

nothing wrong with asking at all. I'm sure you're father would really like to help. I know mam said she would help me cause she knows how difficult it was for her when her and my dad were buying. and both my parents come from large families of 10+ siblings so their parents were never in a position to help! but I would say go for it deffo! I asked my ma a few weeks ago for a bit of help and am currently awaiting mortgage approval! so do it!

Lollipops23

if your dad is in a position to help then i'm sure he'll have no problem doing so. at the moment anyone who is vaguely in a position to buy should be trying to get on the property ladder, as prices will soon be going back up.

explain the situation, but could you manage to pay him back as well as manage the mortgage?

Kintarō Hattori

Lollipops23 wrote: »

if your dad is in a position to help then i'm sure he'll have no problem doing so. at the moment anyone who is vaguely in a position to buy should be trying to get on the property ladder, as prices will soon be going back up.

explain the situation, but could you manage to pay him back as well as manage the mortgage?

We can indeed pay him back. The mortage would be significantly lower than what we're paying at the moment for renting. Even when the interest rates go back up it won't be a problem as we're really quite boring feckers. We don't drink very much, smoke or head out that often so while we're not millionaires we'd manage.

Saucey-Susie

if you parents can absolutely 100% afford to give you 10k and not be stuck, and be ok to wait 3 years till its paid back in full, then you might as well ask

Personally, i hate asking people for money. even for a loan of a fiver. id rather do without than to ask someone for help. I wouldnt ask my parents for help when it came to buying a house, as i dont think they could afford a lot, and im working, so i should be able to do this myself. If they offered anything towards it or helped fit it out, thats differet but i personally just couldnt ask for help

Kintarō Hattori

I would be much like you Susie, I hate asking for anything and would prefer to do without. This situation though affects the girlfriend as well as myself and she has been talking for years about a house and a garden in which to grow vegetables.

My father has always been careful with money and is a good saver. Even though he's been retired many many years he's still taking home more than me even though I'm working!
Whether he'd be prepared to wait 3 years to be paid back in full, well I don't know but I guess the consenus from the thread is ask and find out.

ChewChew

You know what would be a good idea. . . if you had a little payment plan typed up and ready and when asking your dad just tell him that you both have thought long and hard about it and that you can afford to pay X over X amount of years etc. I really think you should go for it, and realistically, 3 years isn't too long compared to the length of your mortgage

Jo King

You should behave like an adult and wait until you can do it on your own. I know people who got help from their family and it only led to grief. The people who lent the money started dictating how the house should look and expected gratitude and homage for years afterwards.
Whilst repayments might appear to be lower than rent at the moment that will not be the case very much longer. The banks are anxious to beef up the margins on their loans and at the first opportunity they will do so. Also the ECB will start lifting its base rates next year. The result will be a doubling of some mortgage repayments. Rents are now dropping and will continue to do so. The math will be very different in a couple of years.

what2do

Many parents have helped their children out in recent yrs and for most this is something they are proud to have been able to do.

Re people talking of prices dropping - if you wait a yr the house needs to have dropped by the amount you have paid out in rent for it to be worth waiting for (if this makes sense!) and if you've found one you really want I'd say go for it as opposed to waiting and then getting one that will do.

niceoneted

I would personally wait and save up all of the deposit and more. What is to stop you making an arrangement with a landlord to be able to have a veggie patch in the back garden. It might be an asset to him for the next renters. It also shows you will have pride in where you live.
You say the place is very reasonably priced but will you say this in 12 months if it has reduced again by 10-20%.
I am an avid watcher of the economy for years and think things are going to get a lot worse yet here. Interest rates are going to start going up come late spring next year.
Also while your dad might be willing to lend money or even give you the money he may not be so willing for your girlfriend. He may see that you not being married is a problem in lending the money. So thread carefully there. While you think you can manage on your budget now there is a lot of hidden expense in a house so you need to factor this in.