Like him so i shouldnt see him again?

Labs

Met a good guy about a month ago and we have had 3 dates. third date went well even though i think i was a bit nervous cause i knew i didnt want to wait any longer about sleeping with him, and it was great he we had fun the chemistry in bed was great and he stayed until about 2-3pm the next day now this might seem crazy but i think i cant see him again he is going to australia end of september. (he says he will be back around january but hasnt booked a return ticket)

Since i will be starting a a masters in september which is stressful enough i dont think i can handle growing to like this guy in the 5 weeks before he leaves and then having to deal with him being gone! Also i have been burned before and im worried im just getting used before he goes and then will be forgotten about.

Is this just mental? im sure some ppl will just tell me to relax and see how it goes but trust is a big issue for me and if i dont really have enough time to build that trust should i just not see him again and say i do like you though so give me a txt in 5 months when you get back from australia haha?

anyone out there think we have any chance?

VaioCruiser

Labs.... it sounds like you had a great time.

I think this is about your philosophy of life.

If we go through life with the point of view of being defined by what other people think of us, then when a relationship breaks down we define it as having 'happened' to us, and we 'have been used'.

If we go through life with the point of view that we are in control of our life and we do things because we want to and we enjoy things because we chose to... then when things don't turn out - we got what we wanted from the relationship, we had a nice time and were happy with that person for however long it lasted.

You sound like you had a very very nice time with this guy. It doesn't sound like you were 'used'. Every time we enter any kind of relationship we take a risk. We risk being hurt. What is the solution ? The only way to 100% avoid being hurt is to stay in our room for the rest of our life.

If you stay away from this guy then you will guarantee 100% that this relationship will end. Is that what you want ? or do you want to give it a chance ?

If you think it has a chance then you have to take a risk. Not for HIS sake or for HIS pleasure but for YOU. If you spend time with him before he leaves and build something special it is surely more likely that he will return than if you don't ... yes ?

If he does not return, have you really been used ? No. You made choices, you took the risk for a good reason and maybe it didn't turn out for the best.

Be positive and don't let life slip through your fingers out of fear.

All the best

Beetlebum

I agree with Valo and think they are wise words...

A few years ago I met a guy at Electric Picnic. We instantly clicked and had an amazing few days together. I was going to Australia for a year in December meaning we only had 2-3 months together before I left. We decided to keep seeing each other and both fell madly in love. He booked a flight and ended up coming to visit me for 3 months of my trip. We stayed together even while I was gone but unfortunately broke up a while ago. Recently we have gotten back in tocuh and are onve again falling for each other. it can and does happen.

Take the risk or as valo said it's over anyway. At least if you try there's some chance of it working out. Fortune favours the brave so go for it. If it doesn't work out at least you tried..

Labs

thanks guys appreciate the encouragement will just have to see how it goes and try to be brave!