Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Advice please

  • 22-08-2009 12:26am
    #1
    adviceplease1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1 ✭


    I know this *should* only be over in the Adoption section but I am really stuck for some advice and figured that this section would get alot more traffic.. thanks in advance.

    Okay, going to really cut a long story short here. I am nineteen and I've known I was adopted since the start, it's all grand.
    A few months ago I registered myself on www.iwasadopted.com, it was one way of being able to passively "search" for my biological parents without having to engage in the emotional rollercoaster that going through the state would be. I was resigned to not finding anyone and had forgotten about it really..
    Then just a few days ago I got notification of a message to the profile. There's a man in England claiming that he could be my father. He isn't sure of exact dates but from what he saw, place and general timing worked out.. Now I have the name of who could be my mother.. and all that.. I really don't know what to do. Should I trust him? Should I act on it? Is it really fair to get in touch with a woman who may or may not be my mother..
    Any advice is highly appreciated.


Comments

  • #2
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Exercise extreme caution with any1 you meet online!


  • #3
    Anna Molly
    Closed Accounts Posts: 502 ✭✭✭Anna Molly


    Eek,
    I guess just ask yourself whether you actually want to know who they are.
    Also, remind yourself that they might not want to know you, they might not actually be your biological parents.
    That's all I've got, sorry.
    I know nothing about adoption.


  • #4
    herya
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,571 ✭✭✭herya


    I think it's hard enough to track your biological parents through the state, are you sure that you want to expose yourself to additional turmoil and stress by going the unofficial route? People who contact you might be mistaken or they might be so keen on finding their adopted children that they can manipulate you and mess with your head.

    From what you write this is already happening. If you want to follow up on this wouldn't it be better to go through the official channels to try to confirm your parents identities? I wouldn't trust somebody just contacting you on the interwebs when there is so much emotion involved. Or possible scams, who knows!


  • #5
    Antilles
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,183 ✭✭✭Antilles


    OP, I've no idea how legit that website you mentioned is, or what criteria they use for validating people. Have you tried the Adoption Board's contact register? http://www.adoptionboard.ie/preferenceRegister/index.php If fact, maybe the Adoption Board would be able to help you validate that these people (or at least, your potential mother) are who you hope they are.


Advertisement