I'm 32 - Should I be thinking of settling down??

LegacyUser

I'm 32, single and enjoying it. Lukily enough most of my friends are single and we go out regularly and often go on weekends away, weeks in the sun etc. To be honest I like being single at the moment and in many ways I am having the time of my life.
However most of my family and work colleagues think I am pushing on and should be looking to settle down. I haven't had a girlfriend in 6 years and am not particularly looking for one although I have been with women on a faily regular basis.
Is it time for me to quit this partying lifestyle and find myself someone to settle down with?
If I leave it any longer will I be too old for all the available women??

Loopsie

i hear ya! im 29 and think about settling down all the time, thought i had met 'the one' turned out not to be true........find myself going wild again, waking up on sunday mornings with raving hangovers and then the fear because i feel like im behaving like a f*ckin muppet and i should grow up and start acting my age...............in all truth i think everyone will settle down at some stage and there will be one person who will make you very happy to do that!!!

Dankoozy

no. why would anyone settle for such a boring life?

Kids
Parent's Association
Mortgage
Dinner parties
Peugeot 807, Toyota Avensis
Being stuck in one place
Sex twice a year

if that lifestyle actually appeals to you then go for it. but don't do it because other people are saying you should. if you enjoy your freedom then you should continue to do whatever the f*ck you like. nothing bad will come of not settling down, just because it's the done thing doesn't mean it's for everyone.

Oh The Humanity

Ah, don't mind 'em.

There is no 'right time' to settle down. If you're not done partying then carry on.

When people first 'settle down' they can be very evangelical about it promoting it endlessly to all around. The novelty will wear off eventually!!

Do your own thing. Living to a timetable is not going to make you happy!!

puglover

Dankoozy wrote: »

no. why would anyone settle for such a boring life?

Kids
Parent's Association
Mortgage
Dinner parties
Peugeot 807, Toyota Avensis
Being stuck in one place
Sex twice a year

if that lifestyle actually appeals to you then go for it. but don't do it because other people are saying you should. if you enjoy your freedom then you should continue to do whatever the f*ck you like. nothing bad will come of not settling down, just because it's the done thing doesn't mean it's for everyone.

Dankoozy settling down isn't for everyone, neither is they party lifestyle, certainly neither of the two are boring! Who are you to belittle anyones lifestyle choices?

I could write a similar list for the party lifestyle but I'm not so niaive as to believe that just because I can find a lists of negatives that it there isn't a list of positives twice as long.

OP do whatever feels right for you. Don't worry about what people think is right for you.

modest_marie

Hey Op,

Nope you SHOULDN'T do anything that you don't want to do.

Do what you feel is right for you. Continue meeting new People, going out enjoying yourself.

When you're ready to settle down you'll either have gotten tired of your lifestyle, or you will have met someone that has swept you off your feet so much that you want to have their Kids!

Go with the flow. Don't worry about pressure from everyone else. What's right for everyone else, isn't automatically right for you.

TheZohanS

Unregistered wrote: »

Is it time for me to quit this partying lifestyle and find myself someone to settle down with?
If I leave it any longer will I be too old for all the available women??

1. No it's not. When you stop partying you grow old, party for as long as you can.
2. The beauty about life is that there'll always be available women. You might have to settle for someone a bit younger than you but with the proper support from your friends I think you'll be able to manage!

Keep going 'til you drop!

Firetrap

No. You don't sound like someone who wants or is ready to settle down just yet. So keep going with the life you're enjoying. Perhaps if you meet Miss Right you might change your mind. Settling down is something to do when it suits you, not other people.

Wibbs

I agree with both Dankoozy and puglover. Dankoozy's list is likely to happen if you make the decision to settle down with the next woman in your life, just for the sake of settling down.

It's all about the person you're with. If its good and healthy and mutually satisfying then it will be good, like puglover suggests. You may have downs but the ups more than make up for it. That could happen and you could find that at 18 or 60. The thing is it has to be the right person for you and you have to be the right person for each other. You're kinda putting the cart before the horse. If you haven't found the right person for settling down with, don't settle down(or for) the wrong one.

J.S. Pill

I have absolutely 0 intention of settling down or moderating my partying anytime soon. I was kind of freaking out a bit for the last week or two, thinking that maybe I should have been concentrating a bit more on career/relationships and such like. Then someone said to me this week, you've got about 40 years until you retire. That put everything in perspective for me.

prinz

Dankoozy wrote: »

no. why would anyone settle for such a boring life?
Kids
Parent's Association
Mortgage
Dinner parties
Peugeot 807, Toyota Avensis
Being stuck in one place
Sex twice a year

Hmm, you know you can 'settle down' with a person without any of that baggage right? I believe the OP is talking about looking for a relationship, or relationships, which in time may lead to something not signing his life away. And as it happens most of the above are just as likely for a single person in this day and age tbh.

TheZohan wrote: »

No it's not. When you stop partying you grow old, party for as long as you can.

Funny thing though, if you look at the stars who are known for their party lifestyle they all age much worse. Go out in Dublin some weekend and get chatting to a few girls..( for some reason it affects girls much moreso than fellas ) very few actually look their age tbh. The drinking, partying etc all adds to premature aging...

Dankoozy

prinz wrote: »

Hmm, you know you can 'settle down' with a person without any of that baggage right? I believe the OP is talking about looking for a relationship, or relationships, which in time may lead to something not signing his life away. And as it happens most of the above are just as likely for a single person in this day and age tbh.

it might be possible alright but so many say it won't happen to them but so many end up living the mundane suburban lifestyle that it must be quite hard to avoid. 'settling down' by definition would imply a far less exciting kind of lifestyle.

Beruthiel

Unregistered wrote: »

If I leave it any longer will I be too old for all the available women??

You know, 60 yo get married too.
There will always be available women.
When the right one comes along it won't feel like 'settling down' it will be something that will come naturally because you want it to.
Until that happens, party on dude.

However most of my family and work colleagues think I am pushing on and should be looking to settle down

Do you want to live your life by their standards and expectations, or your own?

ManOfMystery

There is no perfect age to do everything. Simply do it when it feels right. Some of my friends are in late 20s and settled with kids, others are still partying like no tomorrow. I'm 31 and have a gf, but no children around (and not planning any either for a while) and am quite content as I am for now.

Do what feels right for YOU, regardless of your age, friends or what society would have you do.

Liam Byrne

Unregistered wrote: »

I'm 32, single and enjoying it.

To me, that indicates a "no".

And Wibbs is right - "thinking of settling down" when you haven't found somebody suitable/appropriate is guaranteed to fail.

When you find someone that makes you think about it, THEN there's a decision to be made; until then, there's no basis for even considering it.

Amy33

I'm a 33 year old woman, so you can imagine the pressure I'm under from family and friends to settle down! The truth is that I don't agree with marriage and have absolutely no intention of ever marrying anyone. Family and friends don't want to hear this of course, and I constantly have to listen to "It's okay to be alone now, but what about when you're 50"? It makes me laugh that they all think they are still going to be happily married at 50, when the reality is that as soon as they reach 40-45, their husbands are going to be on the lookout for younger models - for affairs of course..

Liam Byrne

trish990 wrote: »

It makes me laugh that they all think they are still going to be happily married at 50, when the reality is that as soon as they reach 40-45, their husbands are going to be on the lookout for younger models - for affairs of course..

I have to object to the above sexist generalisation, trish....it incorrectly paints all guys as cheating b***arts, while simultaneously implying that women are whiter-than-white.

WAY off the mark from "reality".

ladylouise

Loopsie wrote: »

i hear ya! im 29 and think about settling down all the time, thought i had met 'the one' turned out not to be true........find myself going wild again, waking up on sunday mornings with raving hangovers and then the fear because i feel like im behaving like a f*ckin muppet and i should grow up and start acting my age...............in all truth i think everyone will settle down at some stage and there will be one person who will make you very happy to do that!!!

i am the same as you i though i found a nice guy but he wasn,t.i feel old for my age.
most people are married at 25 + up