Sexually frustrated

LegacyUser

Need advice and opinions please.

I'm female, in my late 20's and have been happily single for some time. Threw myself into work and that is where my priorities are. Have no time for dating. As of lately I have become sexually frustrated - masturbation just isn't enough for me anymore. Thats where my problem is - I need sex.

Have considered going to a male escort. I would have no problem paying money for such a service. Not sure if I could do that because if someone I know found out it would cause problems. My parents are very backwards in the way they think as are some of my sisters.

Decided to try a different approach. Created a profile on a dating site looking for no strings attached fun. Have got plenty of replys and really took to one particular guy. He didn't message me like a thousand times like the others who are pretty much begging for it. He's in a similar situation as myself. So a meet up is possible. I want to meet him. But again if anyone finds out I'd be considered as a whore and a slapper.

Has anybody been in a similar sitution? Has anybody here ever met up with someone they met online for sexual reasons. If so, how was it? How did you feel about it? Did it feel strange meeting just for sex? And advice would be great.

spitfireIRL

not that hard to get sex, go to a club,pub, seduce someone.. i presume its casual sex you're looking for?

oh right didnt read the whole thing. Dont tell anyone

LegacyUser

Im in the same boat 28 male, work has always come first for me and I feel I have missed out and would like some no strings attached fun. But would hate for anyone to find out

shellyboo

Go for it, OP... absolutely no shame in indulging yourself, as long as you keep it discreet. As you say, your only hesitation is in what others will think - but there's no need for them to know! It's your business alone

Go for it, enjoy it... and be safe!

LegacyUser

I think you should go for it... there is nothing wrong with wanting sex. You have chosen a guy that you like and feel comfortable with. Meet up for some drinks to break the ice. You'll feel more relaxed then. I wouldn't just meet in a hotel room and jump straight into bed cos it will feel awkward. Have a date and chill with a few drinks and dinner if ya like and then have some fun!

I'm 30 and single and not a fan of one nighters but have occasionally had casual sex, just because I wanted to. Ive met guys online and just had a one nighter. Don't take it too seriously and have fun. Obviously, condoms are essential and if you feel uncomfortable at all, then just leave. Trust your instincts and be careful, as you would when you meet any guy. You're a modern woman and you're being responsible and having fun. Nothing wrong with that!

Skinfull

nothing wrog with it at all. a friend of mine has done it.

personally i prefer the "friends with benifits" approach as Id be wary about meeting some random off the net for sex.

Victor

Stay safe.

Karmafaerie

Don't know about the whole dating site kinda thing, but I have "met" with women I met online.
Usually from social networking sites.
Or friend of a friend type of things.
If all both of ye are looking for is something casual, then it's perfect really.

I don't see an issue with it to be honest, it's the exact same as meeting somebody in a pub/club/cafe.

The most important thing is just to not do anything unless you're fully comfortable, but once again, that goes for anything really.

LegacyUser

Yes, I've thought about it when single! I had no problem pulling any time I wen't out but I got fed up with it and plus it is a bit dangerous bringing back strangers.

I made a conscious decision to stop pulling strangers for personal safety reasons. I did strongly think of getting a male escort but it would have just been too expensive, plus I don't know if I would have the balls. And if its €200 a time sure you would be bankrupt!

I would love to hear from anyone who has done it though. I've met someone in the meantime thankfully but I would never discount using a male escort in the future.

The thoughts that you are not taking as many risks as in a club pull or are you?

Its not easy to find a reliable FB, someone you fancy and will be available.

castle

You are not a slut whore as you said people might think, this is 2009 people do speed dating,have shag buddy's etc.
Just make sure you meet in a public place first, if all seems good then go enjoy yourself.
There is also another option, single women are always welcome to swing party's
Single women similar to yourself come along and feel safe as they are in a group,can be anything from 16-30 people there.
If you have any questions feel free to PM,
This is not an advert by the way,

Piste

Why do you think meeting a stranger off the internet is any less dangerous than a stranger in a club?

Also would you really enjoy sex with an escort knowing he may be forced into it by a pimp, or that he's hating every minute of it?

Vasco

Most male escorts are bi sexual and the vast majority of their business is from men around 90% apparently. Very few of their clients are women. Just something for you to consider.

LegacyUser

Go for it OP, why not aslong as its safe and fun? Its just a date really, you can can make your excuses and leave at any point.

dny123456

wouldn't think u need to pay an escort to be honest. U should have no problem. Don't be ashamed, its perfectly natural to have sexual needs.

Enjoy

LegacyUser

Go for it, but on your terms. Feel no shame, there are loads of people who would love to get it on with a confident woman in her 20's!

Novella

No one is gonna think you are a slut for wanting sex. It's completely natural and nothing at all to be ashamed of. As other people have advised you, stay safe and have fun.

Katgurl

I've done it once! it was great and far preferable to a one-night stand because they usually occur after a skinful. I think the reason i enjoyed it was because I was thinking rationally, i genuinely liked the guy and i promised myself I wouldn't feel obliged to go through with anythign if it didn't feel right.

Be very careful, get a picture of him & inform him that you've sent it to a friend. Meet him in a public place. if you're going to his, get address first & send to a friend. if he's coming to yours, make sure he knows a friend is expecting a safety check-in from you. Better yet, go to a hotel room.

i don't think i'd make a habit of it, but that's just me, i'd miss the romance aspect. Enjoy!

shellyboo

Novella wrote: »

No one is gonna think you are a slut for wanting sex. It's completely natural and nothing at all to be ashamed of. As other people have advised you, stay safe and have fun.

That's nice and all... but not really true, Novella! Plenty of people out there think women who have casual sex at all are sluts - evne though it IS completely natural and nothing to be ashamed of.

That's why it's so important to be discreet. Though she won't be doing anything wrong, not everyone will see it that way. And in order to properly *enjoy* casual sex, you need to not be worried that you're going to get "found out" or judged. Keeping it quiet is part and parcel of the whole deal, for smart women

LegacyUser

...body ... no body is gonna say DON'T do it ! but remember ,

This is something you want to keep secret. And be discreet about.
You probably will meet someone great and have a great time , and maybe even have great sex , but is that ALL you want ! ?

scanlas

Not only is it a good idea for you to be discreet, it's a good idea to find a guy who'll be discreet who won't go off bragging to everyone.

OS119

Hi OP,

if you want discreet, and i understand why, just go elsewhere - Belfast, Dublin, Glasgow, Edinburgh, Manchester, London etc... get cheapie flights, book a hotel room, and either sort out an escort or just go to a club and pull.

i'd advise having a whole weekend planned out, so if its crap, or you don't pull what you're looking for, the thing wasn't a total waste of time.

if you're independent, with bottle and don't have a face like a bag of spanners, then you'll pull to some degree - if your hot, then you'll get all the offers you want, but do remember this is about getting getting laid, not meeting 'him', so get laid, and don't worry if he wasn't the man of your dreams.

good luck, have fun, don't get drunk, and stay safe.

LegacyUser

Don't attempt the escort route, apart from the expense involved, and as a previous poster said many are bisexual and downright risky. The real issue you may have is that there will be a record of you contacting said escort - phone,or e-mail and it will be held for minimum 2 years. Now just imagine if said escort or agency falls foul of the vice squad (they do still exist, believe me and are currently very active on the human trafficking front) and a little bit of checking is done on Mr. Escort then the s**t will hit the fan for you.
Book into a good class hotel any week night (week nights are best) and you will meet plenty decent guys who are "on the road" salesmen etc etc and if you fancy one get chatting and have a few drinks and bobs your uncle.