No Bridesmaids?

katetehblue

Thing is, I'm not really bothered about having any bridesmaids. My friends are mostly guys and I'm not really keen on asking someone I'm not that close (family or friends) to just for the sake of having bridesmaids. But my fiance, my parents, and his family all flinched at the idea of me not having even one. One of his sisters even called me a friendless loser.

My fiance and I are thinking of getting married next July and although our original intention had been to elope or to get married abroad inviting closest friends and immediate family only, we've started to consider a more "traditional" church type wedding.

Whatever we do we're going to have a very tight budget at most 5-6k, which is not the issue but it doesn't hurt to mention it. Needless to say this means we're keeping things small. So I don't get what the big deal is?

My fiance's best mate will be his best man. And just to clarify I'm not saying, I don't want bridesmaids so you can't have a best man or anything of the sort, and he doesn't at all feel like I am. He just says it doesn't feel right that I don't have any bridesmaids. I've tried to see it from his point of view but it just doesn't make any sense, and i now feel a bit selfish for saying it.

I don't know, is it a big deal? Is everyone else right? Should I just ask someone to do it and keep everyone else happy?

esharknz

I'm not having any at all. With 12 guests, there seems little point. It's also an additional expense too.

Don't ask someone for the sake of it.

Enii

You'll need to get someone to sign the register as witnesses to the wedding.

Your bridesmaid and best man normally does this.

The Big Red Button

I'm going abroad to get married. There's only going to be a few people there (somewhere between 10-20) and I don't want to be picking and choosing between these people for bridesmaids and groomsmen, as the reason I'm inviting them and only them is because they all mean a lot to me. Also I have three sisters, none of whom would really be interested in it, but I'd still feel bad about bypassing them for my friends. So we might just decide not to bother having any.

However if we do decide to have bridesmaids and groomsmen, my fiance will have his cousin and best friend as groomsmen, and I'm going to have my two best friends (one male, one female) as bridesmaids! (Or "dude of honour", as my male best friend is planning on calling himself!) Well I don't see why I shouldn't have him as my bridesmaid, when he's most definitely the best person for the job, just because he was born with a penis. And for the record, he's straight.

Basically my point is, it's your wedding, suit yourself! Ask one of your male friends if you're closer to them, or just don't have any bridesmaids, it's no big deal. And at least you won't have to worry about being upstaged by the bridesmaid!

Everyone else will just have to get used to it.

ecaf

Maybe your could have fiancé could have his best man, and you don't need to have a bridesmaid, but instead ask one close male friend to sign the register afterwards? Might be an honour for him to do this without having to get into any other fuss of dressing up and being up on the alter with you.

You don't need a bridesmaid really, now I had one, but it isn't vital to have one. Unless you feel you can't manage your dress or need help with something. I'm sure some one will help you do up your dress (if necessary).

prinz

Yup like others here there won't be any best man/groomsmen/bridesmaids at mine. Didnt see the point. It's going to be a small simple enough wedding so the extras were unnecessary. Had to appoint one of my friends "best man" because I was being constantly asked, but made it clear he had no duties whatsoever. You can get anyone to sign for you. It's your wedding, you decide and screw everyone else.

LimeFruitGum

You're only being honest, your prospective sister-in-law can shag off if she doesn't like it.
A girl's best friend doesn't have to be another girl; we can be friends with lads too :-)

tatli_lokma

I didn't have any bridesmaids or even a'best man' technically. We had a civil cermemony and had two friends act as witnesses. One of the witnesses undertook some 'best man ' duties such as paying people etc.

If you don't want to go down the bridesamid route then dont let anyone make you feel obligated. You could even get a parent or close family member who means something to you to sign the register. Having to make them a 'bridesmaid' and put them in a dress etc is not necessary, and they may prefer it.