To ask or not

Jackobyte

I'm a fourteen yr old. I'm back frm Irish College two weeks now. There I met a girl who I really liked. She was attractive, very friendly and kind and best of all, she was easy to talk to. There was no awkwardness and our conversations never stalled. I've never experienced this before with a girl. After a while, conversations with girls usually titter out but not with her. I thought she liked me as well and I was planning to ask to "meet" her on last night (young way of saying shifting or frenching). But... I went home early due to a family funeral and never did:(. We swapped numbers, e-mails and bebos and we have texted every day since she came home.(Three days after me) I have talked to a friend about this and she encouraged me to ask her out but I'm worried that current relaxed atmosphere will be broken and conversations will become awkward. Also there is a distance issue. I'm from Limerick and she's from Kilkenny.

Sephiroth_dude

You should go for it,the distance might be a problem though.You'll never know unless you ask her.best of luck.

Firetrap

You should give it a go. You'll never know the answer unless you meet her again. The distance thing could be a problem at your age but maybe you'll find a way around it.

djcervi

I say go for it. You probably will (considering the Gaeltacht) end up eventually getting out of contact with this girl from the gaeltacht when you go back to school, your own lives, etc. I'm sure you can get a bus to Kilkenny (www.buseireann.ie) easily enough. Get your mini reunion going!

Coffee Addict

Give it a go, you have nothing to lose & everything to gain!
If you are afraid to meet up, then for the moment keep txting & emailing, get to know each other better & keep up the vibe you had while you were together.
But Kilkenny-Limerick is only a short hop......so give it a go!
Best of luck

djcervi

Coffee Addict wrote: »

Give it a go, you have nothing to lose & everything to gain!
If you are afraid to meet up, then for the moment keep txting & emailing, get to know each other better & keep up the vibe you had while you were together.
But Kilkenny-Limerick is only a short hop......so give it a go!
Best of luck[/quote

Yeah if you're afraid why not bring some of your mates along and she can invite some of her mates, preferably from Irish college . It makes things more relaxed. Even better OP are they any reunions between people planned from the Gaeltacht? you and her could go.

Jackobyte

djcervi wrote: »

Even better OP are they any reunions between people planned from the Gaeltacht? you and her could go.

There are and I had hoped to meet up with her there but her mother won't let her go claiming it is too long a trip...

EDIT:Reunion is on in Dublin.

Coffee Addict

Don't give up......keep txting, if her mum thinks that going there is too far will she think Kilkenny-Limerick is too far, if so invite her to your house so her parents know she will be looked after

Jackobyte

Coffee Addict wrote: »

if her mum thinks that going there is too far will she think Kilkenny-Limerick is too far, if so invite her to your house so her parents know she will be looked after

Thanks for the advice but I wouldn't really trust two teenagers overnight together under one roof if you know what I mean... Hormones are starting to kick in and teenagers are fairly horny. I know I wouldn't dream of it but there are quite a few people in my year at school (I'm going into 3rd year next month) who have lost their virginity. I mean like 10+ outta 150 if not more...

Ibrahimovic91

lol shes 14, ull forget her in a month

Jackobyte

Ibrahimovic91 wrote: »

lol shes 14, ull forget her in a month

Teenagers aren't as shallow as you think!!!

Sephiroth_dude

Did you get the courage to ask her yet?

Jackobyte

Sephiroth_dude wrote: »

Did you get the courage to ask her yet?

No problem with courage but her grandad died so I'm going to wait until after the funeral....

Sephiroth_dude

Jackobyte wrote: »

No problem with courage but her grandad died so I'm going to wait until after the funeral....

ohhh....good idea.

Ibrahimovic91

Jackobyte wrote: »

Teenagers aren't as shallow as you think!!!

i was your age 4 years ago i think i know a lil what im talking bout k.

Jackobyte

Ibrahimovic91 wrote: »

i was your age 4 years ago i think i know a lil what im talking bout k.

Well maybe we're not all as shallow as you were.....

Rosita

It seems a bit odd to a 14 year old who is presumably not in a positon to travel independently on a regular basis discussing something like this.

I went to the Gaeltacht a few times during my teens which was before the era of ubiquitous mobile phones and I often wonder at how the ability to remain in contact with people changes the vibe. It was a heightened experience in those days in the sense that people became your great friends for three weeks and then you never saw them or heard from them again......ever......and this informed the atmosphere.

It is strange knowing that you can keep contact technically at least but all your common reference points are gone once you leave the Gaeltacht. In my time these things fizzled out naturally and while there is a certain sadness thinking back on people you knew back then and wondering where they are now, but there is also the realisation as you get older that the whole experience was ephemeral and is probably better that way.

The sensible advice would be at 14 to forget about mad stuff such as a trip from Limerick to Kilkenny. There is of course a possibility (probably an outside one though) that the counties will meet in the All-Ireland Hurling Final which seems an opportunity to meet up.

But it seems an awful lot of work for a "shift" to be honest.

And it is also a reality that people's views and attitudes change massively very quickly during the teenage years though of course it never seems that way until it happens. What seems hugely important at 14 means squat at 16/17, but learning that is all part of the process I suppose.

Dublinstiofán

If you really like her arrange to go to the same gaeltacht as her for the next couple of years. 3 weeks fun in the sun. I'd forget about her until then. Won't work with long distance in my opinion expecially at 14yoa.

Drop her the odd txt and it will be no time until next summer rolls around again.

Monkey61

To be honest Op the chances of any kind of long distance relationship set up even getting off the ground at 14 are slim to none. Neither of you are going to have the money or the means to travel to see each other often and I very much doubt that the parents of any 14 year old girl are going to let them skip off down across counties to hang out with a guy that they barely know without a lot of hassle of meeting you and your parents and such. Even then it is unlikely.

Why not stay in email contact, chat on MSN and just leave it at that. Realistically dude there is no point in having a girlfriend that you will never get to see, she may as well just be your friend as she is now. She will be meeting lots of guys and you will be meeting lots of girls during the school year and it would be unfair of either of you to expect that not to happen to the other.

Work on enjoying your own life as it is now. Keep in contact anyway and maybe next summer you will be back in the same Irish college together.

Jackobyte

Rosita wrote: »

But it seems an awful lot of work for a "shift" to be honest.

Do you really think I'm that desperate for a shift???

Getting a shift... Easy
Finding a girl who you're comfortable around, who you enjoy talking to and who enjoys you're company... Bit harder

Rosita

Jackobyte wrote: »

Do you really think I'm that desperate for a shift???

Getting a shift... Easy
Finding a girl who you're comfortable around, who you enjoy talking to and who enjoys you're company... Bit harder

It's not a question of your level of desperation for a 'shift' at all, it's just that at 14 I fail to see how it would be more than that.

Jackobyte

Rosita wrote: »

It's not a question of your level of desperation for a 'shift' at all, it's just that at 14 I fail to see how it would be more than that.

TBH when I posted this I didn't mean a relationship where we traveled up and down every weekend to see each other. What I meant really was an affectionate "electronic" relationship...

Rosita

Jackobyte wrote: »

TBH when I posted this I didn't mean a relationship where we traveled up and down every weekend to see each other. What I meant really was an affectionate "electronic" relationship...

Well hopefully that should hardly be a problem in this day and age.

karlog

Jackobyte wrote: »

TBH when I posted this I didn't mean a relationship where we traveled up and down every weekend to see each other. What I meant really was an affectionate "electronic" relationship...

What you mean like, with a robot.

Jackobyte

karlog wrote: »

What you mean like, with a robot.

Ya, with a robot... Did I forget to mention she was a Furby???:rolleyes:

GirlatdRockShow

i think you should just go for it!you seem to have gone to a good bit of effort already,might as well follow it through.