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What should you ask your boss

  • 22-07-2009 8:38am
    #1
    3qsmavrod5twfe
    Closed Accounts Posts: 440 ✭✭


    You have one hour to ask your manager some questions (I do today). What would you ask?


Comments

  • #2
    That_Guy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    I'm unemployed.


  • #3
    raido9
    Closed Accounts Posts: 409 ✭✭raido9


    I had one of these recently. It would help if you told us what field you work in.


  • #4
    Pop's Diner
    Closed Accounts Posts: 423 ✭✭Pop's Diner


    Where's ze money Lebowski?


  • #5
    Kiera
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,130 ✭✭✭✭Kiera


    Is this a serious thread or are you looking for joke replies?


  • #6
    Cuddlesworth
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,012 ✭✭✭✭Cuddlesworth


    Tighty whities or boxers?


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  • #7
    Quazzie
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,308 ✭✭✭✭Quazzie


    Does your successful business acumen compensate adequately for your lack of penis girth?


  • #8
    Quazzie
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,308 ✭✭✭✭Quazzie


    Kiera wrote: »
    Is this a serious thread or are you looking for joke replies?
    C'mon Kiera, you know AH better than that.

    It doesn't matter what the OP wants, he'll take what he's given :D


  • #9
    3qsmavrod5twfe
    Closed Accounts Posts: 440 ✭✭3qsmavrod5twfe


    raido9 wrote: »
    I had one of these recently. It would help if you told us what field you work in.

    Medical Devices
    Kiera wrote: »
    Is this a serious thread or are you looking for joke replies?

    Anthing at all, I know what I'm going to ask, just want to see what people come up with, be it serious or just for a laugh. Its a slow day...


  • #10
    Quazzie
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,308 ✭✭✭✭Quazzie


    Anastasia Red Fairy wrote: »
    Medical Devices

    Ask him is there any medical device in the pipeline that will rival viagra.


  • #11
    Rabies
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,258 ✭✭✭✭Rabies


    Do I get your performance bonus plan?


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  • #12
    That_Guy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    Do you like cheese?
























































    'Cos I'm an easy single.


  • #13
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Can I go to lunch now?


  • #14
    Kiera
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,130 ✭✭✭✭Kiera


    Quazzie wrote: »
    C'mon Kiera, you know AH better than that.

    It doesn't matter what the OP wants, he'll take what he's given :D
    I'm sorry, i have failed AH :(


  • #15
    OldGoat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,638 ✭✭✭✭OldGoat


    Anastasia Red Fairy wrote: »
    Medical Devices
    ...
    Is that a sphygmomanometer in your pocket or are you just suffering from elivated blood pressure due to my awesomeness?

    I'm older than Minecraft goats.



  • #16
    That_Guy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    Is it, or is it not ok to ejaculate into the water cooler?


  • #17
    thomond2006
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 45,433 ✭✭✭✭thomond2006


    "So, if God has existed forever...you know, what did he do in his spare time, like, before he made the Earth and everything?"


  • #18
    jebuz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,771 ✭✭✭jebuz


    In the itchy and scratchy CD-ROM, Is there a way to get out of the dungeon without using the wizards key?


  • #19
    Wazdakka
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,467 ✭✭✭Wazdakka


    Do I need to swallow to keep my job?


  • #20
    brandon_flowers
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,657 ✭✭✭brandon_flowers


    Any chance of a BJ?

    Then rattle off

    "There is nothing on this earth sexier, believe me, gentlemen, than a woman you have to salute in the morning. Promote 'em all, I say, 'cause this is true: if you haven't gotten a blowjob from a superior officer, well, you're just letting the best in life pass you by."


  • #21
    cherryghost
    Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 17,137 Mod ✭✭✭✭cherryghost


    How do they put the figs in the fig rolls boss?


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  • #22
    CHD
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,956 ✭✭✭CHD


    Where can you buy those little plastic ends to put on your shoe laces?
    Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
    Why does sour cream have a use-by date?


  • #23
    Wazdakka
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,467 ✭✭✭Wazdakka


    cherryghost wrote: »
    How do they put the figs in the fig rolls boss?
    I actually know the answer to this.
    Muhahahaha :p


  • #24
    Quazzie
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,308 ✭✭✭✭Quazzie


    Why do Doctors wash there hands before colon examinations?


  • #25
    Farls
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,785 ✭✭✭Farls


    Is your boss male or female?


  • #26
    cosmic
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,175 ✭✭✭cosmic


    Not so much a question, but...

    http://pushrod.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/modern-toss-work.jpg


  • #27
    DamoDLK
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 716 ✭✭✭DamoDLK


    Q1 - Is my job safe?
    Q2 - (depending on response) - how do they get the figs into the fig roll?:pac:


  • #28
    Silverfish
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,698 Mod ✭✭✭✭Silverfish


    Why is it called an asteroid when it's in the hemisphere, but a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?


  • #29
    Loomis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,692 ✭✭✭Loomis


    Ask them if they're happy.
    When they pause and look at you trying to figure out what you're doing, say

    Cause Lever Brothers will give you your money back.


  • #30
    WeeBushy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,572 ✭✭✭WeeBushy


    Wazdakka wrote: »
    I actually know the answer to this.
    Muhahahaha :p

    We all know it's magic so there's no point pretending otherwise.


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  • #31
    jonsnow
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 724 ✭✭✭jonsnow


    Why did you promote Tibor ahead of me!!!


  • #32
    ShooterSF
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,824 ✭✭✭ShooterSF


    What is the air speed of an unladen swallow


  • #33
    common_parlance
    Closed Accounts Posts: 49 ✭common_parlance


    ShooterSF wrote: »
    What is the air speed of an unladen swallow

    What! is your favourite colour?


  • #34
    Wurly
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,095 ✭✭✭Wurly


    Why were so many people let go in the job today?
    Am I next?
    How much do I get if I take voluntary redundancy?

    All questions I would like answered but guess i'll just have to keep enjoying the remainder of my Oz holiday until I can ask. Hard life.:)


  • #35
    cherryghost
    Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 17,137 Mod ✭✭✭✭cherryghost


    Given that God is infinite, and that the universe is also infinite, would you like a toasted tea-cake? :pac:


  • #36
    G_R
    Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 5,028 Mod ✭✭✭✭G_R


    off the top of your head, what is the square root of 1569518137


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  • #37
    Starmix
    Closed Accounts Posts: 48 ✭Starmix


    Do you know the way to San Jose..........la la la la la la la la la laaaaaaaa


  • #38
    soundsham
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,848 ✭✭✭soundsham


    whats your favorite position and why?


  • #39
    biko
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 81,220 ✭✭✭✭biko


    Who do I have to suck to get a-head in this company?


    Geddid?


  • #40
    monaghanbiffo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 129 ✭✭monaghanbiffo


    Ask him does he want a kick in the face!


  • #41
    LouOB
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,181 ✭✭✭LouOB


    Why do birds suddenly appear everytime you are near?


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  • #42
    Agent Smith
    Moderators, Regional East Moderators Posts: 21,504 Mod ✭✭✭✭Agent Smith


    "why are you sleeping with the mailroom boy?"


  • #43
    Ruu_Old
    Closed Accounts Posts: 36,634 ✭✭✭✭Ruu_Old


    That_Guy wrote: »
    I'm unemployed.

    Nice way to kill the thread, didn't work!:p

    When meeting with your boss, beat yourself up (see Fight Club for reference material).


  • #44
    Quazzie
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,308 ✭✭✭✭Quazzie


    "Does this look like its infected to you" whilst opening the fly on your trousers.


  • #45
    Local-womanizer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,798 ✭✭✭Local-womanizer


    soundsham wrote: »
    whats your favorite position and why?

    "CEO,because I get to fire people like you" will probably be the response.


  • #46
    Rabies
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,258 ✭✭✭✭Rabies


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NisCkxU544c


  • #47
    Porkpie
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 717 ✭✭✭Porkpie


    Do you know I look at Boards.ie at work?


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