Public Displays of Affection

LaFleur

[FONT=&quot]
[/FONT] Are you comfortable being affectionate with your partner in public?
Would you kiss or hold hands? More to the point would you do either on the street, or in a non gay venue? Just curious to know your thoughts were, going on the experience of two guys in a club that was mentioned in a previous thread here in the forum.

Goodshape

Yeah, I generally wouldn't have a problem with it around Dublin. I'd display as much affection as I think is appropriate for any couple. Happy to say I've never gotten any abuse for it.


In Donegal ('home'), on the other hand, I've had some asshat "accuse" me of being gay, look me straight in the eyes and tell me he wished I were dead for -- as far as I can tell -- no worse a crime than dancing to some cheesy old pop song or something. Thankfully that's only happened the once but it does stick in the memory somewhat.

LegacyUser

I regularly kiss my man in public and sometimes in the park we roll on top of one another and laugh we are human beings after all with needs and desires

Tight Jeans

I regularly kiss my man in public with little or no fallout. In the park we would roll on top of each other. We are after all human beins with needs and desires. Once we were in a shopping center and we were holding hands and a man shouted queer at us so to annoy him i kissed my man on the lips

mobius42

Tight Jeans wrote: »

Once we were in a shopping center and we were holding hands and a man shouted queer at us so to annoy him i kissed my man on the lips

It saddens me to think that people would actually shout at people in the street like that. No wonder so many LGBT young people struggle with depression; I'm socially anxious enough as it is without having people shouting at me. Good response by you though!

Tight Jeans

Thank you for your encouraging words. We are both not shy about displaying our affection for each other. I was very afraid to show my love in the past for previous bf and this was often the downfall of relationships which lead to long bouts of lonelyiness and depression. I need my sppon of sugar during the day

pcurls

i sometimes hold my girlfriends hand in the street but rarely kiss her and she has a problem with it. i dont have a problem with being gay. if i was straight i wouldnt snog the face off my boyfriend in the street either. on the other hand there are certain situations when i wouldnt hold my girlfriends hand which is sad but its just to avoid confrontation with ignorant w*ankfaces who insist on name calling and even throwing stuff. you see my problem is i wouldnt just smile and walk on i'd chase the ****ers and probably get into alot of trouble so i avoid situations like these, much to the better halfs annoyance!:(

Tight Jeans

pcurls wrote: »

i sometimes hold my girlfriends hand in the street but rarely kiss her and she has a problem with it. i dont have a problem with being gay. if i was straight i wouldnt snog the face off my boyfriend in the street either. on the other hand there are certain situations when i wouldnt hold my girlfriends hand which is sad but its just to avoid confrontation with ignorant w*ankfaces who insist on name calling and even throwing stuff. you see my problem is i wouldnt just smile and walk on i'd chase the ****ers and probably get into alot of trouble so i avoid situations like these, much to the better halfs annoyance!:(

Oh so true

unreggd

Tight Jeans wrote: »

In the park we would roll on top of each other. We are after all human beins with needs and desires

Needs and desires a lot of people dont want / need to see, regardless of the couple's sexuality

kabuk1

My girlfriend and I hold hands regularly when walking around Dublin. We also kiss occasionally on the street, but it's usually just a peck on the cheek/lips. There are parts of the city that we tend not to hold hands because of the frakers in the area.

I find that I show as much PDA with my girlfriend as I find appropriate regardless of being in a straight or gay relationship. I'm not going to make out with her in public, but that's because I don't want to see anyone else making out in public either.

prinz

mobius42 wrote: »

It saddens me to think that people would actually shout at people in the street like that. No wonder so many LGBT young people struggle with depression; I'm socially anxious enough as it is without having people shouting at me. Good response by you though!

Don't take it to heart pal, people get shouted at in the street for all sorts of reasons.

Jafin

Tight Jeans wrote: »

I regularly kiss my man in public with little or no fallout. In the park we would roll on top of each other. We are after all human beins with needs and desires. Once we were in a shopping center and we were holding hands and a man shouted queer at us so to annoy him i kissed my man on the lips

Thats the best thing to do, show them it doesnt bother you and they'll feck off speechless. Well most of the time...

KeyLimePie

PDA's are icky no matter what sure holding hands is okay, or a quick peck, but full on in there meeting for ANY sex is just innapropiate

BrotherBoniface

Jafin wrote: »

Thats the best thing to do, show them it doesnt bother you and they'll feck off speechless. Well most of the time...

More power to you

BrotherBoniface

kabuk1 wrote: »

My girlfriend and I hold hands regularly when walking around Dublin. We also kiss occasionally on the street, but it's usually just a peck on the cheek/lips. There are parts of the city that we tend not to hold hands because of the frakers in the area.

I find that I show as much PDA with my girlfriend as I find appropriate regardless of being in a straight or gay relationship. I'm not going to make out with her in public, but that's because I don't want to see anyone else making out in public either.

What is a fraker?

oneweb

I like the 'being caught'ness idea of it

One very recent Saturday, I saw 2 girls holding hands just before getting off the bus AND not just 1, but *2* guy couples holding hands at the front of Stephen's Green, that was great to see!

What's with the couples who love to shove it in everyone's faces?? Sure, a nice lil kiss is cool but a full-blown slushfest on a crammed Dart, yeugh! keep it til ye get to yer own place!

azezil

I've no problem greeting my partner with a kiss and on parting. If we're walking through a park or sitting by the quay we hold hands and cuddle just like most other couples would. Doesn't bother me and haven't had a negetive reaction to it.

Shellie13

Generally only in certain pubs/clubs. Usually I wouldn't even hold my girlfriend's hand in college despite being in a very open campus and being very "out". Not out of fear or anything- just don't like being stared at.

Ironically we were walking down the street a few weeks back and we see these really pretty lesbians stroling down the street hand in hand. We were like "awah isn't that sweet" especially when they turn around and gave each other a peck. Say anyone looking at us would've accused US of staring :cool:

Monkey61

I have no problem with it at all. I'd hold hands or kiss my girlfriend anywhere really, just the same as if I was in a straight couple.

Sometimes I'd feel slightly uncomfortable if walking past large groups of scummy kids, but I think that seeing same sex couples holding hands on the street might go some way towards normalising it for people who wouldn't encounter it often and that can only be a good thing.

Myself and my ex-girlfriend were approached by a group of about 7 kids on Camden Street one night who were beyond fascinated by the nature of our relationship. We were a bit drunk so we stopped to chat with them. Amongst the "ah but that's disgusting", they just genuinely had loads of questions and if us chatting away to them and not running away ashamed will open their minds a bit then brilliant and I am happy to do it!

Slightly embarrassing when one of them spotted me in the shop I worked at over Christmas one year and delightedly dragged his friends in to point me out and shout loudly enough to get all the customer's attention "Look, she's a lesbian. And she has a girlfriend! We saw them kissing!" It was pretty hilarious though!

LegacyUser

I kiss my bf in public, but it sort of makes me uncomfortable in case someone who doesn't know I'm bi sees. I usually have to be drunk, but I don't know which would be worse: saying "yeah I'm bi" or "No I was drunk". >_>

Jafin

Unregistered wrote: »

I kiss my bf in public, but it sort of makes me uncomfortable in case someone who doesn't know I'm bi sees. I usually have to be drunk, but I don't know which would be worse: saying "yeah I'm bi" or "No I was drunk". >_>

what about:
"Yeah, no Im a drunken Bi." ?

Anything that makes one stand out usually attracts both negative and positive reactions from people. This is not an exclusive experience of gay people alas, we all get it. Being gay you currently just have one more thing that attracts people to you.

If it bothers you then of course you will have to amend your ways to avoid it, but I agree with the people on this thread who feel it is best to just go ahead. You will never be fully comfortable unless you are being your natural self and I agree that it “normalises” it to some extent.

I currently have two gfs who also love each other very much so I experience what you mean vicariously through them. In the end however, anyone who gets to know them experiences them as little balls of harmless joy who have found love in this world and they celebrate that.

People need to start to realise that it does not matter who is feeling or expressing love, but that in this oft dark and painful world the mere fact hearts have found love is enough to celebrate. Every person you walk past showing nothing but love in front of is one step on the road to making that change.

shannone

i have no problem holding my gf's hand in public or not, depending on what she was comfortable doing.:) Extreme PDA's are gross, I really do not want to see other couples make out/grope each other in the middle of the street and I wouldnt want other people to have to look at me do it.
I had friends who were a couple and were nauseating to be around, constant PDA, it was enough to make u celibate!! :eek: :eek: