Runaway

LegacyUser

This is going to sound so crazy but really need advice and there is no one I can ask.

A guy I was with on and off for 6 years has decided to sell up and move to USA and has asked me to go with him. Its been a couple of years since we were together and it always seemed inevitable that we would end up together except that he got married last year.
No surprise to anyone that the marriage isn't working out and they are ending it.

He says he loves me, should never have married this other person, etc. I love him and I really want to be with him but am I mad in the even to consider moving a few thousand miles with him???

Terodil

Don't do anything rash! You're only going to hurt yourself.

If you two are really destined to be together then try to stay in contact and start out cautiously in a LDR. Take it slowly and prudently.

But running away with him to be his first aid kit... no. That's madness.

flibbertyjibbet

Before you up sticks and move thousands of miles away with this man I think you need to work out the problems which caused you to keep breaking up over a six year period. All the best!

LegacyUser

Let him move over first & then you could go and visit him to see how you get on and how you like where he is living. It's a huge move for you and you need to think it through properly. Give yourself time to work this out carefully and then it might have a chance of working.

Sarah W

Depends. What ties do you have here? A job, a mortgage, debts, prospects? If you don't have any valid reason to stay then I would say go for it! Of course you need to sort out residency/visas etc but what is the worst that can happen? You come back older, wiser but with another view on the world.

VaioCruiser

Leavin on a jet wrote: »

This is going to sound so crazy but really need advice and there is no one I can ask.

A guy I was with on and off for 6 years has decided to sell up and move to USA and has asked me to go with him. Its been a couple of years since we were together and it always seemed inevitable that we would end up together except that he got married last year.
No surprise to anyone that the marriage isn't working out and they are ending it.

He says he loves me, should never have married this other person, etc. I love him and I really want to be with him but am I mad in the even to consider moving a few thousand miles with him???

In a word YES. 100%.

Tell him fine, that's great, I'm happy and maybe we can have a future. But running away is no solution or path to happiness. Tell him to stay here and let's see how things go.

All the best.

tanyaog2007

go for it , if it works out good and well, if it donsn at least u tried , you olny live once so grab happiness with both hands

dreamers75

go for it worst thing in life seemingly is regret.

Mr Benevolent

Don't bother. He's already considering cheating, you have a patchy history, so it's not going to end up working out. If you do go you'll obviously need a green card etc, so it's not as easy as it seems. Go because you want to move countries, not because of him.

FC2009

Hi!

If you love him and trust him and if it feels right then I say def go!!! Life is too short! If it doesnt work out, it doesnt work but only you know what he is like and if you love him enough. How did you feel when he got married? How will you feel if he goes with out you?

Best of luck with whatever dicussion you make!

x

LegacyUser

Thanks for all your replies.
I've decided to go out there for a month about 2 months after he goes and take it from there.I figure he should have settled well into his new life at this stage and I should be able to decide whether or not I fit into the picture.
I probably sound like the saddest person ever but I think I'm just looking for my happy ever after!

VaioCruiser

Unregistered wrote: »

Thanks for all your replies.
I've decided to go out there for a month about 2 months after he goes and take it from there.I figure he should have settled well into his new life at this stage and I should be able to decide whether or not I fit into the picture.
I probably sound like the saddest person ever but I think I'm just looking for my happy ever after!

There is nothing sad about you or your situation in the least. We are all looking for the same thing. We have different obstacles in our way and we deal with them in our own way. I wish you all the best. Your choice of action makes a lot of sense.

All the best.

Gemini Sister

You've not said - how is it that he knows you on and off for six years and is only married to someone else one year?

But if it was me - I'd still go for it!

The States is great fun. Even if you and him doesn't work you'll still have fun and meet lots of interesting people. People are a lot more open than here and its easier to make friends.

Do it.