Does he still love her?

LegacyUser

My partner of 3 years is currently in the process getting divorced., nothing to do with me they'd separated before we met. When we first got together it was all stops and starts due to the fact that he wasn't over his marriage break up, eventually this seemed to calm down and we've been very much together ever since. From time to time I have doubts that he's fully over the past, but for the best part I try to keep these to myself figuring that they're my issues, lately as the "divorce process" hurtles towards it's end he's been a different person, moody, irritable and I feel I can do no right, when I ask him if somethings wrong I'm told there's not and everything is peachy, it clearly isn't. His wedding anniversary was last month which is when the situation started, he told me he was going to get good and drunk that night to "celebrate" the last one as this time next year they're bound to be divorced.
He remains on friendly terms with the ex as they have children, this I have never had a problem with as it's nice for all concerned.
I'm not sure what I'm asking or looking for, but some opinions or even shared experiences would help, thanks.

Stheno

He could be worried about any issues that might be brought up by his ex in terms of joint assets or the children when it comes to going through the divorce courts, it could be that he's finally coming to the end of what is a long process, and there may be some residual grieving there on his part (even subconsiously)

Or it could be that he's never gotten over his marriage breakup, and now that divorce is looming, whilst it's never final here in that there is no clean break divorce, it is the most final ending to a marriage you can have here.

Or it could be that he's stressed about work, or about something else entirely unrelated.

Best advice really is to maybe cook a nice meal, or go out for a nice evening and just bring it up politely, i.e., is everything ok, you haven't seemed yourself recently?

Seperation/Divorce is not an easy process, even when both parties still get on, it's one of the most stressful things that you can go through, and it can be very hard to deal with when you are essentially uncoupling two lives and the results of them.

Good luck.

stackerman

nouggatti wrote: »

Seperation/Divorce is not an easy process, even when both parties still get on, it's one of the most stressful things that you can go through, and it can be very hard to deal with when you are essentially uncoupling two lives and the results of them.
.

I agree, bloody hard thing to deal with, esp with kids involved. I dont think you can expect him to be the same old guy during this time and to be frank i dont think he will really want heart to hearts about it (I've been there). Just try to understand the stress and pain he is in over a PAST relationship/family unit. He did love her once and therefore there will be a pain involved, but I dont think it is likely that he still loves her. Just be patient and give him some leeway, by the sounds of it it'll pass soon enough.

Time out

Yeah its tough to get thru it - it really is - I reckon its just the final bit of stress of getting out of the thing. You sound like you are pretty supportive so just continue as is and it will pass. Id be pretty sure he doesnot still love her or anything "out there" like that